Hey there, darling BEttyJ. YOu are alive. There is no point in passing these days, months, years you have in front of you in crying. You are ALIVE. Smile for that fact alone right now. This is all worse for you having seen your mother die but I am SURE you have much much much more life in you yet.
Hoist your skirts for the battle. SMile to beat down the demons.
Know that we at least are ALWAYS but ALWAYS there for you.
A life of tears is not so much worth living. Think about that and accept what you cannot change and change for the better everything you CAN change
Sending you lots of courage and love
Irismarie