Is it FTD?

[Raeann]

I am so worried that my PALS is developing FTD. I have read up on it lately and it seems llike it to me. It isn't as extreme as some of the stories that I have heard, but I think it is starting. He was diagnosed in October of 2011, but for over a year before that he was running around with women that he met on the internet a LOT. There were 6 women that I know of for sure. We had been together for 5 years and he never ever cheated on me until then. Since his diagnosed he has lost all compassion for anyone who doesn't have ALS. He has always been kind of hateful at times, but lately he has been downright mean. He feels he can say and do anything to anyone, even stangers on FB who are trying to be nice to him, and that it's OK because he is dying. His VA benefits has doubled what he was making when he was working and he spends spends spends. He does put some away, but he likes to blow his money on him and him alone. He says he deserves it cause he is the one dying. On a saturday I was the love of his life and he couldn't wait to do the things that we had planned and on the following Monday he was done with me and I haven't heard from him since. He doesn't return his mother's calls or her texts and that is not like him at all. I don't know if this is realy something serious or if it's just his way of dealing with the disease. I know he won't have anymore tests done, he says "I have ALS and that's that" So I really don't know where to turn from here. Any suggestions?

 

[sadiemae]

Welcome Rae, I have no advice on how to make a stubborn man admit he has a problem. Up until lately, it was thought that the mind was not affected except in severe FTD cases(about 5%) That thinking is now changing, and there are meds to help control it, but he has to accept he has a problem first. Just like an alcoholic. HUGS Lori

 

[Katie C]

OK here's the deal with FTD: "executive function" leaves so they no longer are CAPABLE of realizing that their behavior is hurtful. Honestly he sounds pretty textbook to me: hurtful, me first behavior. excessive spending (there are a number of us that could share credit card horrer stories) Impulsive sexual behavior with no concept that it isn't acceptable. Does your PALS neuro have an e-mail address? It's a great way of informing the doctor of what's going on in advance of an appointment. Otherwise write it all down and slip the note to the receptionist when you go to your next appointment. You passing on information and concerns does not violate confidentiality. Many find that just getting the diagnosis is a relief.. that there is some kind of reason for the bizarre behavior. Things he said to me, our son, our son's girlfriend... very creepy stuff. But at least we knew why and were able to do some things to work around it.

 

[brooksea]

If he has FTD, you will probably not be able to convince him. Can you email the ALS Clinic with details of his behavior? They can most likely tell you if they think he may have it. Our clinic was going to set up for a questionnaire to evaluate my husband during a regular clinic visit, as they felt my description of his behavior pointed towards FTD. That way it wouldn't have been like going for just an FTD eval and it would've been slipped in with the rest of the routine. But, my husband decided he didn't want to go back to clinic, so I just dealt as best I could.

On a saturday I was the love of his life and he couldn't wait to do the things that we had planned and on the following Monday he was done with me and I haven't heard from him since. He doesn't return his mother's calls or her texts and that is not like him at all.

Are you saying no one knows where he is? This might be serious! It sounds like his lack of judgement could get him into big trouble.

 

[brooksea]

Katie, great minds...

 

[Katie C]

Yup CJ... great minds that travelled the same road. E-mail is a life saver!

I agree that the no contact is very worrisome. Glen got himself into some scary situations... driving on the light rail tracks, getting hit by the descending arm at a railroad crossing... I would certainly consider a call to the local police if you guys don't know where he is!

 

[LizT]

Seems strange that if he has been in no contact with anyone in days and days, why havent the police been called? Especially if you truly think there is a FTD issue... Does his Mom think this may be a problem too?

 

[Raeann]

Thanks everyone for your advice. He has been heard from and he is fine. I can not contact his neuro because we are not together anymore. Also there is a snitch on here too (as well as the closed groups on FB) who has told him everything. So I will be deleting this thread. Thanks for the help though.

 

[sadiemae]

Rae, you will not b able to delete the head, but you an close it. Go to the blue bar at the top, click thread tools and close it.

 

[Raeann]

How do you delete this thread?

 

[sadiemae]

It can only be closed, not deleted. Hit the "thread tools" in the blue bar above and his close thread.

 

[Raeann]

it doesn't say close thread. Just show printable version, email or subscribe. O well he already knows what I wrote and I just won't be writing anything else.