For care Givers

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Geo

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Joined
Aug 24, 2007
Messages
500
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DX UMND/PLS
Diagnosis
12/2001
Country
US
State
Florida
City
Ruskin
The reason a care giver is a caregiver is first of all they Care for that person . Maybe sometimes TOOOO Much so that you become an Enabler ,Enabler is Like for Alcoholics
You actually enable them to carry on as usual ,instead of them taking charge and working with you ,they use you as a crutch . Beware of this . Keep in mind the patient has to help themselves as well . Hope this can help someone . Geo
 

olly

Extremely helpful member
Joined
Jan 10, 2008
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2,732
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PALS
Diagnosis
11/2007
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uk
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uk
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uk
have you and your wife been having a disagreement geo,only kidding lol.
i do agree with your point though.
the carer has to let the patient do what they are able so that they dont feel completely useless or worthless.
i like to try to do things myself even wash the dishes sometimes,my son can get annoyed if i want to do them.
he helps alot but sometimes i have to bite my tongue if its not done as well as i would have done it.
its very frustrating for both sides .
take good care.
caroline:-D
 

Geo

Senior member
Joined
Aug 24, 2007
Messages
500
Reason
DX UMND/PLS
Diagnosis
12/2001
Country
US
State
Florida
City
Ruskin
OLLY LOL No we are still friends LOL . What i was getting at is some caregivers here are here because the patient they represent is unwilling or claims theyre not computor Savy . Well im not computor savy either ,But i wasnt getting any answers from my health care providers ,so wehat do i do sit in a corner and cry or do what i said GET UP AND GET GOING . We use to have a saying Do Something even if its wrong ,This means Show an interest at least . as my father got older he would mention something and i would say ,what did you do about it ? He would then say Nah wont do no good . Thats an excuse for being not willing to try something . Like a Caregiver who is helping a parent on this disease, who is unwilling to go to Appointments or take the neccesary Meds and the caregiver is crushed and frustrated . Because of care for this individual who is doing nothing to help themselves . By the way Connie works all day so i vaccum and load the dishwasher and keep the house straightened . Might take along time but i geter done .
Im not the kind of person that would use my caregiver for only what i wanted . After all this person is going out of their way to help me . She use to go with me to my Doc visits but she has to make a living and save for her retirement . So i can do that myself . Im not going to be a burden on my wife if i can help it . Im not the easiest guy to get along with but i'll try . I say what i need to . Love Geo
 

olly

Extremely helpful member
Joined
Jan 10, 2008
Messages
2,732
Reason
PALS
Diagnosis
11/2007
Country
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uk
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uk
geo

i only got into computers after i got ill,before i would not even know how to turn one on lol.
i have found lots of hobbies like sewing,gardening but that has sadly got too difficult over the last couple of years.
also the dreaded jigsaws and crosswords lol,i am old beyond my years.
i do some light housework when i can,still cook but don,t have the strength to push a hoover thats one of my sons jobs.
you and your wife sound like a great team,she does well going out to work with you not well.
i am sure you are a very agreeable man to live with,well as much as any man can be lol.
take good care.
caroline:razz:
 

sral

Distinguished member
Joined
Sep 15, 2007
Messages
289
Reason
Learn about ALS
Diagnosis
n/a
Country
CA
State
ontario
City
toronto
Geo thanks for your concern. I get the message.

We actually have had a turn around and she did go to her appointment. The appointment went well and she is feeling more positive. She even went as far as saying she was willing to try new things that may help her. My mom does everything herself ... house cleaning, cooking, she is totally independent for hygiene and dressing. The only thing she is stubborn and unwilling on is seeing her neuro and trying new things. She believes the neuro visit does nothing. As proven correct yet again today. It was the pain specialist that actually helped her deal with her symptoms. And as for the trying new things, she's tried so much to no avail. I guess this is where I need to step back and respect what she wants. Maybe this is not a sign of "giving up" but rather "acceptance" of this is the way it is.
 

Geo

Senior member
Joined
Aug 24, 2007
Messages
500
Reason
DX UMND/PLS
Diagnosis
12/2001
Country
US
State
Florida
City
Ruskin
OOOOH I forgot to mention ,i Swifer the Tile floors , those things are COOL . She wont show me how to do Laundry though, Drat . I can still bathe myself (shower ) Im slow but sure . And to Vaccum isnt too bad its kind of tricky ,i have to move to one location keep my balance and let the arms reach out ,move to the next local same thing . its a slow process but it gets done . Is the Glass half Empty or Half Full ? Some days its very close to Empty . Being im in a warm climate i can do Gardening ,Puts around in my Shop /Garage / Shoot some Pool . at the Clubhouse . Im my own Caregiver for the Most part ,but then the Boss gets home and cooks for me . Geo
 

sral

Distinguished member
Joined
Sep 15, 2007
Messages
289
Reason
Learn about ALS
Diagnosis
n/a
Country
CA
State
ontario
City
toronto
Geo I love your spirit.

By the way, the climate makes a huge difference. My mom was a prisoner of her home last winter when we had storms almost 2x per week. She definitely got out alot more in the summer and now Fall is at our heels.
 
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