Rant or hysterically funny?

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KimT

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So, I've been having issues with my Bio Bidet 2000. I bought it in November 2016 so it's less than a month out of warranty (no big surprise.) The water in the holding tank no longer heats and the stream is about 1/3 as hard as it used to be in two out of three settings.

I unplugged it, turned off the water, drained the holding tank, cleaned the nozzle (I've cleaned the nozzle many times before but this time I really cleaned it and used a toothpick to make sure there wasn't a hard water buildup.) Still didn't work properly.

This afternoon I decided to give it another go so I completely removed it and disconnected all the hoses. I re-cleaned everything, made sure the hoses were clear, then put it back together and turned the water on. Same problem.

By then I was getting mad at myself for not just calling the company but I decided to see it first hand. I put my hand on the "occupied" part of the seat and pushed the "feminine" button. The nozzle came out and it sprayed weakly into the air, practically a drizzle. I'm not sure why I did the next thing but I did. I pushed the enema button and it gave me an enema right in the face. :LOL: I quickly took my hand off the occupied space and turned off the water. Well, that part worked fine. My glasses, hair and face were all drenched with TOILET WATER. All I could think of is thank heavens I didn't have my eye surgery yet because I do think some of the water went into my left eye. Of course I flushed my eyes out with water and I'll probably put a drop of antibiotic in it, too.

After that happened I called the company. They said I could send it in and they wouldn't charge for examining it even though it was out of warranty. They said they would give me a break on the repair cost. As I was talking to the manager I told him another issue I had and that was blue water coming out of the holding tank for a couple of seconds before clear water came out. I don't use chemicals, especially blue ones in my bathroom and the inside of my toilet tank has clear water. He had never heard of this before but he said he would see if he could solve the issue.

Meanwhile, I saw they had one on Amazon for $150 off so I just ordered it. I'm sure I can install it myself since the mount is still on the toilet seat and the rest is pretty simple. At least it'll have a three-year warranty.

I hope it arrives before my surgery on Monday. I really got used to the bidet.

Next up is my ice maker. The refrigerator is only three years old and the ice maker broke. The Samsung man comes tomorrow. My last Samsung refrigerator only lasted five years but I loved it. I'm hoping this will be a quick fix. I don't mind buying a new ice maker as long as it works correctly.

Next life I'll probably come back as a plumber.
 

KimT

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Just don’t hook the ice maker up to the toilet. 🤣
I'm already spoiled by the heated bidet seat. 😂 Although, when I was trying to heal the fissure, I tried ice for the pain. It didn't work :LOL:
 

KimT

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The new bidet came today. I left the old hoses on and hooked it up. It worked fine but not before I stood up from bending over (I can't squat) and banged my head on the cabinet hard enough to see stars.

I can't wait until Monday to get my right eye done. Too many close calls with my eyes. I'm done with the plumbing and handyman work here. As I was packing up the old bidet I banged my knee and about dislocated my already sore kneecap.

I keep having dreams about my eyes and vision.
 

affected

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oh hon, I hope that ends the dramas and it works like a charm from now on forward. 💗
 

beauty4everyone

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That's the problem with toileting , toilets and bidets -. There's no "end" to it. B.;)
 

KimT

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I got the new bidet and put it on. Works like a charm. Glad to have my warm water back and I'll start saving again on TP. Had I known the value of this piece of equipment, I would have had one years ago.
 

Narrowminded

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So sorry about your recent troubles. Sending prayers.
 

affected

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so very glad it is working Kim PHEW!
 
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