Paraprosdokians

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bkite

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PALS
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US
State
Washington
Have you ever heard of Paraprosdokians?

First time I heard about paraprosdokians, I liked them.
Paraprosdokians are figures of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected and is frequently humorous. (Winston Churchill loved them).

1. Where there's a will, I want to be in it.

2. The last thing I want to do is hurt you ...
but it's still on my list.

3. Since light travels faster than sound, some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

4. If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong.

5. We never really grow up -- we only learn how to act in public.

6. War does not determine who is right, only who is left.

7. Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.

8. To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.

9. I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.

10. In filling out an application, where it says, "In case of emergency, notify..." I answered "a doctor."

11. Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.

12. You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice.

13. I used to be indecisive, but now I'm not so sure.

14. To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target.

15. Going to church doesn't make you a Christian, any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.

16. You're never too old to learn something stupid.

17. I'm supposed to respect my elders, but it's getting harder and harder for me to find one now.
 

wishmobbing

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Dec 5, 2017
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Love these!
 

Angiegal

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Me tooo!

Angie
 

MarieLaure

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May 16, 2018
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Loved one DX
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10/2015
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FR
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Ile de France
I’ m thinking of using these as a fun exercise for my pupils. I’ ll give them the beginning and they must imagine an end that is Grammatically correct but doesn’t make serious sense.
Thanks a lot
Great fun
 

Chincoteaguer

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Dec 21, 2017
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12/2017
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State
Virginia
Our good man Winston C. said:

"The United States has the worst gonernment in the world.

Except for all the rest."

Anonymous:

"Your car will run better with a Champion Spark plugs,

Than without any at all".
 
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