Is Your Pals Ready to Die?

[LornaDoone]

I'm not sure how to handle it when my pals is ready to die. I will miss her terribly when she passes.. so selfishly, I still want her around regardless of her condition. Selfishly, I do not care what condition her body or mind is in, I want her to live.

She has very clearly told me of her wishes and seems to be very firm on them. She is getting more and more depressed. Her ALS has been pretty slow moving and she is concerned about prolonged discomfort. She sees her doctor regularly to monitor her depression and is on meds. We get her out quite a bit for fun. I am quite happy to say that up until recently, she has totally still been living her life regardless of her condition. Now she seems to be waiting patiently to die.

I'm not so sure I can be supportive of her wishes like I feel I should be. I have discussed this very thing with her and it's brought up some really good conversations.

I really dont want to add more stress to her life than she already has. She is an adult and can make decisions regarding her care all by herself. She is of sound mind. Do I really want to encourage her so strongly to live? Or do I want to embrace any decisions on her care and life that she makes?

 

[joelc]

I really don't know how to advise you. Some people can accept and live with this disease, others can't. If she is going to fight you and is not happy then your life will be miserable and I would advise you to honor her wishes. If she can get past her depression and be happy then that will be a different story.

I hope you can make the right decision and things improve.