Chewy302
Member
- Joined
- Jan 29, 2017
- Messages
- 10
- Reason
- Loved one DX
- Country
- US
- State
- Arkansas
- City
- Little Rock
Hello everyone,
I haven't posted very much, but I need to vent a little today. My BF was officially diagnosed with ALS Dec 2016, but had symptoms for at least a year prior to that.
Now that he is becoming less mobile, I find it very frustrating that he is not taking steps to make arrangements for finances, arrangements, etc before he is no longer able to do so. We do not live together and both own our homes. His house is not in great condition and will be hard to sell. Sometimes I feel like he is being selfish and stubborn and not thinking of his family (his parents are 80+) and me who will be responsible for things when he can no longer care for himself. When I try to bring up these subjects he doesn't want to talk about or gets upset and then I feel guilty for ruining his day. I feel like he is still in denial even though he knows the diagnosis is real. For example, he says the extra mucus and throat closing up is due to allergies and doesn't even consider the possibility that his ALS is progressing.
Also, he has lost roughly 40-50 lbs since December because he does not eat the way he should--never has. BUT what really angers me is he stopped taking the appetite stimulant because he "thinks" it was interfering with his sexual performance. It may be my priorities, but that would be one of the last things I would worry about if I had ALS. And he isn't maintaining very good hygiene because it takes too much energy--even though he has a shower stool and grab bars. He still tries to stand in the shower and fell a few weeks ago. Am I wrong to feel like he should just use the stool!?
I am starting to feel resentful and have thought of leaving the relationship on several occasions but always feel guilty that I would be "abandoning" him.
I haven't posted very much, but I need to vent a little today. My BF was officially diagnosed with ALS Dec 2016, but had symptoms for at least a year prior to that.
Now that he is becoming less mobile, I find it very frustrating that he is not taking steps to make arrangements for finances, arrangements, etc before he is no longer able to do so. We do not live together and both own our homes. His house is not in great condition and will be hard to sell. Sometimes I feel like he is being selfish and stubborn and not thinking of his family (his parents are 80+) and me who will be responsible for things when he can no longer care for himself. When I try to bring up these subjects he doesn't want to talk about or gets upset and then I feel guilty for ruining his day. I feel like he is still in denial even though he knows the diagnosis is real. For example, he says the extra mucus and throat closing up is due to allergies and doesn't even consider the possibility that his ALS is progressing.
Also, he has lost roughly 40-50 lbs since December because he does not eat the way he should--never has. BUT what really angers me is he stopped taking the appetite stimulant because he "thinks" it was interfering with his sexual performance. It may be my priorities, but that would be one of the last things I would worry about if I had ALS. And he isn't maintaining very good hygiene because it takes too much energy--even though he has a shower stool and grab bars. He still tries to stand in the shower and fell a few weeks ago. Am I wrong to feel like he should just use the stool!?
I am starting to feel resentful and have thought of leaving the relationship on several occasions but always feel guilty that I would be "abandoning" him.
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