My baby is so weak

[rosec]

Barbie, you and your DH are in my thoughts.

 

[scaredwifetx]

My thoughts and prayers are with you and you family.

 

[scaredwifetx]

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

 

[poppies]

Barbie you are all in my thoughts and prayers.

 

[Gembead]

Hugs for you Barbie, hope you get the rest you need to see you thru this tough time.
Love Gem

 

[maryhahnward]

Thoughts and prayers for all of you Barbie!

 

[Barbie]

so last night I thought he had rallied for a bit. he slept all afternoon and woke up about 7:30 last night. I got him out of bed and he ate dinner and then watched TV without his bipap until 11:30. he even smiled! I thought what is this? the boy is better!

this morning he got out of bed at 8 and seemed good. we had coffee, and I could hear his voice. but within a half hour his eyes started to cross and his voice became weak. his O2 was at 90. he asked for an Ativan and the bipap and is now drifting in and out of sleep. I know the Ativan makes him sleepy but I don't think that is all that is causing this.

I am sitting here watching him sleep and all teary eyed, something that hasn't happen in a very long time. I feel very alone physically, but emotionally I feel full. I appreciate all of you, and so many other friends that are texting me to check on me. I am sad, because my children are afraid and are not here with us, yet I know they can not stop their lives right now. we don't know how long this can take, and they need to go on. they cant be sitting here, waiting and waiting. it could be today, it could be tomorrow, it could be next week or next month. we have lived with this for 8 years, can't really grasp that it could be ending sooner rather than "some day" I had wanted us to all be here for him at the end. but I suspect it will be just me. scared.

 

[Nikki J]

Oh Barbie. Sending you both a huge hug. Know each of us is there with you in spirit. I believe he will go as he wishes- with just you or with the kids there or even alone as you step away for a minute. My mom clearly waited until my sister and niece were there. I had been there all week and she was just going along then they came over and she went peacefully but oh so quickly! And I have seen the opposite when someone surrounded by family slips away when they leave the room. It will go as it is meant to. Prayers for strength for you

 

[Atsugi]

Barbie, we hear you and we're here for you. Of course, your children love their dad and would be there if they could. Remember that just the two of you started living as one years ago before your babies were born, and you are still together as husband and wife now. Bless you for your unwavering love. --Mike

 

[Nuts]

Barbie, I'm glad you can feel the love all around you. I know your sweetheart feels your love also, and that that gives him peace. You have been such an incredible wife and caregiver, and now, perhaps, comes the hardest part. I like what Mike wrote--that you started your life together with just each other. If his last moments are just with you, you will have come full circle. Peace and love.

 

[Jeanau]

Barbie, you've handled so much with grace, humor, and love...I hope you feel some peace in knowing that you've always been there and continue to be there for your love. God bless you both!
Audrey

 

[lgelb]

Barbie, Nikki is right -- as long as you are there with him, helping him however he asks, he will find his best way. He knows how the kids feel, and you. They do not have to be there for him to know. But he probably has a pretty good sense of timing and you could ask him about if/when he wants them summoned. Just be direct with him, as you have always been. The most hurtful death is words unsaid.

The only thing to be scared about, if you think about it, is pain, and it sounds like that is not a factor. And if things change, that is under your control. I would have liquid morphine tucked away, if you haven't. Otherwise, everything is there that he really needs.

All the best,
Laurie

 

[4tloml]

Your love has brought you so far and through so much. It is rare, wonderful and well-earned, and I hope it comforts you both now. Thinking of you at this hardest of times.

 

[anderkling]

Barbie, I join the many others here in prayer for you at this darkest of times. Whether the kids are there, whether you are alone or with a friend, whether it be day or night, now or in a few days or weeks, prayers are with you that it will be "right," the right time, the right way, peaceful and without fear for either of you. May you experience strength and grace to carry you through, to both hold and to let go, to still cherish him while he is here, and when he is not. Love to you, Barbie, with tears.
- Charlene

 

[skipper66]

Barbie,
I haven't been on much lately. I just saw your post. I am so sorry to hear that your husband is having such a hard time. I wish I could do more to comfort you. I will keep you in my prayers. Love and hugs to you, Kim

Paulette,
I am also very sorry to hear that you are having some very rough days as well. I will keep you in my prayers as well.

All of you: You are in my thoughts and prayers. Kim