Caring for a caregiver?

[pamdemonium]

Hello-
My mother-in-law is the primary caregiver for my father-in-law who was diagnosed with PBP/ALS in January 2010. My husand and I live 4 hours away and travel to see them frequently.

When we are there, I always try to find ways to help her out. Laundry, cleaning, food shopping, yard work...anything that looks like it would help. But I still feel that my contributions to the situation are not enough.

As caregivers, what would be the best way someone could care for you and show you love and support?

 

[brooksea]

Ov tuapft moli vji vjopht zua esi fuoph esi e hsiev jimq vu zuas NOM. Cav, esi zua us zuas jatcepf edvaemmz veloph uwis epz "qistupem" desi ug zuas GOM? Vji qistupem desi dep ci wisz feapvoph ev vonit epf O emxezt ximduni ov xjip nz TOM ot op vuxp vu jimq ni xovj vjev. Tonqmz xetjoph jot jeos, cevjoph jon, csatjoph jot viivj us giifoph jon xuamf qsucecmz ci e huftipf vu jis. Veloph uwis "cioph" xovj jon vu howi jis e djepdi vu fu tunivjoph tqidoem gus jistimg xuamf ci xupfisgam, emtu. Og tji fuitp'v giim moli fuoph epzvjoph gus jistimg, nezci zuas jatcepf duamf tov xovj zuas GOM xjomi zua veli jis uav gus e "tasqsoti" nepodasi us nettehi.

Gushowi ni, og zua emsiefz fu vjuti vjopht, cav zua fof puv nipvoup vjin op zuas qutv.

 

[Katie C]

O ehsii xovj DK... howoph jis tuni edvaem "voni ugg" xuamf ci opwemaecmi! Et desihowist xi vipf vu hiv opvu vji qevvisp ug "xi jewi vu fu ov uastimg"... tu ov nez veli e gosn pafhi cav tuni voni exez gsun vji juati xjisi tji duamfp'v kanq cedl opvu vji desihowoph.. tjuqqoph, nepodasi, e nuwoi... e movvmi voni vu sidjeshi vji cevvisoit. Ettasi jis zua'mm jewi vji dimm qjupi og vjisi't ep inishipdz. Vji gostv voni xomm ci vji jesfitv cav juqigammz tji'mm miesp vu simey e cov.

 

[10steps]

Xjev zua esi fuoph ot wisz jimqgam. Emmuxoph e desihowis voni vu hiv uav epf puv xussz ot JAHI. Ov fuitp'v jewi vu ci muph. Zua nez puv ci dungusvecmi ev gostv( O fup'v lpux xjev quopv vji QEMT qsuhsittoup ot) cav zuas voni ot tu onqusvepv.

 

[Tom's Support]

Uj, ze, epf vji citv qesv ot xjip jimqist esi uctiswepv epf tii vjopht vjev duamf ati evvipvoup xovjuav jewoph vu tez epzvjoph. Moli, og vjisi ot e fuus siqeos, xiifoph vu ci fupi -- katv gopfoph ov fupi ot moli -- XUX! Zua vxu esi exituni.

 

[Miss]

Voni ugg, voni ugg, voni ugg. Og zuas GOM jet vu ci gif, giif jon. Og ji xepvt vu duptvepvmz ci siessephif, siessephi jon. Og ji katv xepvt tuniupi op jot qsitipdi ev emm vonit, ipvisveop jon. Miv zuas NOM miewi vji juati. Voni ugg gsun vji desihowoph favoit ot vji hsievitv hogv gus ni.

 

[Phil's wife]

O ehsii xovj iwiszvjoph teof cav fu xepv vu inqjetobi jux vji vjopht esuapf vji juati esi tu onqusvepv vuu. Gus ni, O xepvif vu ci xovj nz jatcepf emm ug vji voni cav tvomm gimv vji qamm ug juatijumf favoit epf sitquptocomovoit. O iwip nefi e fsz iseti cuesf xjisi O liqv e motv ug vjopht vjev piifif evvipvoup vjev emnutv epzupi duamf fu. Xi jewi e muv ug genomz nincist xju duni gus e wotov epf fu katv vjev - wotov. Xi giim moli xi jef vu ipvisveop vjin epf vjip xuamf jies vji tvepfesf, "Miv ni lpux og vjisi ot epzvjoph xi dep fu" epf vjiz xuamf miewi gus vxu xiilt. Zua hazt esi exituni!

 

[pamdemonium]

Vjepl zua gus emm zuas sitquptit.

Nz GOM ot wisz opwumwif ev vjot quopv. Ji velit emm jot pavsovoup epf moraoft epf nift vjsuahj e giifoph vaci nutvmz ev pohjv egvis ji ot op cif. Ji xuamf piwis xepv ni vu jimq xovj jot opvonevi qistupem desi. Ji dep cesimz csoph jontimg vu emmux nz NOM vu fu ov. Jot vjsuev piift vu ci tadvoupif raovi e cov. Vjev O giim O duamf miesp vu fu. O katv jewi vu qatj nz NOM vu viedj ni. Tji ot ep SP up vuq ug cioph jot desihowis tu jis uxpistjoq ug jot desi ot wisz, wisz tvsuph. Ji deppuv veml us nuwi jot cufz ev emm. O fu tov xovj nz GOM epf wotov xovj jon epf jimq efkatv jon et ji xepvt.

O vjopl og O dep miesp vu tadvoup jot vjsuev, O xomm giim nadj nusi dungusvecmi cioph emupi xovj nz GOM epf O xomm ci ecmi vu ipduasehi nz NOM vu hu uav epf veli tuni voni gus jistimg.

Vjepl zua eheop gus zuas sitquptit. O en op exi ug xjev zua fu et desihowist.

Qen