Shifting Sands...

I don't think the picture came through. So I'll do links this time...


Elise - Day 8 The cup gives you some reference for their small size.
https://imgur.com/2s0MJIN


Elise - Day 12 See the heart on her side? That's from Elsie!

https://imgur.com/yEvSGN6


Elise - Day 16 Nestled between her two brothers
https://imgur.com/rlj12bj

Dear Jim, hugs back to you. It's a true challenge for both PALS and CALS to live one day at a time. Thinking of you both.

V

Jim,

I'm so glad to hear your son is with you and Darcey. You are both in my thoughts and prayers.

Jim what a wonderful update. So happy that things are in a better place for a while, and that your son can be with you. Sending those hugs right back to you.

When those of us that work in IT make one of those boo boos it is extra inflating, don't I know it!

Thank you Jim, I know you are very high in my thoughts so the update is so appreciated, yet I don't want to take your time away from Darcey.

Sending more strength and love your way my friend xxx

Thanks for the puppy pics. I love getting a puppy fix .

Hugs to you and Darcey.

Jim, Thank you so much for the update. We all appreciate knowing how you both are doing. I'm so happy that Darcey is getting something into her for nutrition. That can be tough with the swallowing issues and general lack of appetite. Yay for mashed potatoes! Really enjoy the visit with your Son. I feel like I've been rejuvenated when my babies come home to visit. I hope the same for you both. Hang in there Jim. Your both doing great! Hugs to you both.

BTW....what a beautiful little baby your pup is! Lucky dog.

Thanks for the update Jim. Glad to hear things are a little better right now. Enjoy your son's visit! And that Elise is one cute little girl!

Just a quick update...


Darcey's attitude and mental disposition improved significantly while our son was here. He left for home, yesterday, and Darcey began the morning with a multitude of snide and snipping remarks. I didn't respond to them and did our morning routine with a gentle smile affixed to my face. I'm sure much of it is due to missing both our son Jim and his cat Gray (who has been with us since mid-December). Once downstairs, with teeth brushed and coffee in her, her attitude has steadily improved... to even include a few "thank you's".


During Jim's stay, she tried eating small amounts of things by mouth and had at least one Jevity each day. I can't convince her to do any more than 2 in a single day. But that's better than her determination to quite nourishment entirely.


We have a puppy due to come home at the end of March. As of today, she is 4 weeks old. I'm hopeful that the prospect of the new puppy will give Darcey something more to look forward to.


Thanks all!


Jim

Been thinking of you both Jim.

That low number of calories will affect her mood a lot. It will be much easier for her to feel 'down' because she is fuelling everything by burning her own body up now.

I say this in the hopes of helping you a tiny bit each time Darcey snips and snaps because it's not you, and it's not her, it's the damned monster.

Many hugs man, I hope that puppy represents joy and hope to you both xxx

Thanks, Tillie!


I know that it isn't the gal she was before ALS. But even though my head knows that, it still hurts the heart. Often, it is silly stuff. For example...


Last night, before bed, Darcey asked to me to look out the window to see if it was snowing when I got up at 5AM to use the bathroom. The instructions were, "If it is snowing, open the window and wake me up so I can see it." I don't get up precisely at 5AM every night, but I do typically get up at least once and move her around before putting myself back to bed.



I tend to watch 30 - 60 minutes of YouTube, Netflix or Prime, with headphones in, before calling it a night for myself. Last night, just shy of 1AM, I checked the hourly weather forecast. It was calling for no snow, only rain, and a minimum low of 36 degrees F. So I saw no sense in setting an alarm for 5AM and, instead, decided to just check when I woke up. Of course this was the night that I slept through and didn't wake until 9AM.


I explained that I'd checked right before bed and knew that it wasn't going to get any colder than 36 degrees and would only continue to rain. I explained that I'd planned on checking when I did my nightly potty run but had instead slept soundly through the night. I also verified with her it never got below that same 36 degrees all night. Didn't matter. She informed me that I was inconsiderate, did not care about her wishes and only cared about myself... yada, yada, yada, yada.


So yeah... the head knows... but the heart still gets bruised.


Thanks for your comments.


Jim

Let's remember to add the CO2 issues in as you tell yourself how this is not the real Darcey.

I just so identified with that story. While it may not snow here, that whole scenario totally resonated.

I suggest you vent as often as you need to however you need. You might remember I used a little strategy to vent pressure - as I would walk along the hallway in the house I would pull really awful horror movie type faces, really exaggerate them, and wave my hands up in the air like I was drowning or being attacked and shake my head.
It became a game for me how horrid a face I could create, and how close to the end of the hallway I could keep it up for, and then instantly transform to 'normal' with a pleasant smile on my face, and a calm easy lilt to me walk.

What this did for me was really release actual physical tension as well as emotional tension, and the fact it was a game with myself meant I then really made myself calm and it was amazing how much better I felt able to cope with so much!

Even if you don't do something like your own version of this, when it's bad you can always imagine me pacing my hallway like a maniac :lol:

I've been thinking about you and a Darcey a lot. Hang in there Jim. I can only imagine how hard this is for you. It's not Darcey. It's the beast. Keep reminding her of that beautiful little pup in need of some serious loving to arrive at the end of March. Keep reminding yourself too Jim. Hugs to you.

No matter how many times your head tells you they can't help it, it hurts... Sorry Jim! I remember that feeling.