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stephie

Distinguished member
Joined
Mar 28, 2008
Messages
117
Reason
CALS
Diagnosis
01/2007
Country
US
State
mn
City
coon rapids
For four years I search this site to try and prepare myself for what the end would be like for my husband. Now that he has passed away, I would like to share this with others who are trying to prepare themselves.

I do not want to upset or offend anyone, so please do not read any further if you do not wish to know! I will tell you that it was much more peaceful than I had anticipated.

My husband signed up for hospice about 2 months ago. He was almost completely paralyzed, could not speak, and his breathing was quite low, but he was still using bipap only at night. Hospice started him on low doses of Morphine to take away the "air hunger" feeling, so he was much more comfortable. He had a great quality of life until the last couple of days. He got up every morning, got on his computer, and spent the day watching T.V. and following the stock market online. He had long chats with both of the kids when they came home from school.

A couple of weeks ago he felt like he could not breathe. I gave him several doses of Morphine and called the hospice nurse. She came out and gave him more medication until he fell asleep. I was afraid that he would not wake up in the morning, but he did. He felt a little better and wanted to get out of bed. He was up for about 15 minutes when he began gasping for air. He knew it was the end and he asked me (on the computer) to let the nurse do whatever it took to keep him comfortable. The hospice nurse arrived and gave him medication every 2 hour to keep him asleep and breathing comfortably.

Once John was asleep, he never gasped for air. His body was more relaxed than it had been in a long time and his face was peaceful. I had enough time to call the family and he died 12 hours later. He did not wake up, his breathing just got slower and slower until he quit breathing. His greatest fear was that he would die gasping for air, and he did not. He slept peacefully until the end.

I know that every situation is different, but my husband was able to die as he lived- on his own terms.
 
thank you. prayers to you and your family.
 
thank you for sharing your story and i am so very sorry for you loss. My deepest condolences to you and yours.
 
As a caregiver for my husband, I have lain awake many nights thinking about how his last hours will be. I could not bear the thought that he would slowly suffocate, terrorized by what was happening.

Your story gave me hope that his end can be peaceful. It sounds like you had a great hospice group. I hope we will be as fortunate.

I offer my condolences and thanks for your candor.

P Bush's Wife
 
Thanks for sharing. May peace find you.
 
Thank you so much, Stephie! Thank you for caring for us cALS and letting us know your experience. I really appreciate it!
 
Thank you so much for this. My mom is in hospice now (as of about a month) and can walk but barely speak, is on a feeding tube and only has use of one hand and that is minimal. As of yesterday she wanted oxygen full time. As of today she stopped having the feedings, claiming constipation but I would not be surprised if she's trying to take things into her own hands. Will contact the nurse about the morphine and now can tell her it will take away the "air hunger" because up until now she has refused. Thank you and my prayers are with you.
Linda
 
Thank you for sharing these intimate details. My sincere condolences on your loss. I wish peace and resolve for you.
 
Thank you for sharing and peace be with you.

AL.
 
so sorry for your loss. thank u for sharing. it gives me a easy feeling knowing.
 
Stephie, I'm very sorry to hear of John's passing but so glad you were there for him during his illness. Thank you for all of the loving care you gave!
 
Stephie, Thank you so much for sharing what many of us wonder. I am so sorry for your loss.
 
Thank you for sharing. My sister passed very similiar. I am so sorry for your loss.
 
Thanks for sharing this experience. My husband went the same way. May god bless you at this difficult time
 
Thank you for sharing your story.....I'm sorry for your great loss.
 
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