MamaSara6
Member
- Joined
- Apr 3, 2007
- Messages
- 24
- Reason
- Loved one DX
- Country
- US
- State
- GA
- City
- Alpharetta
Jacquelyn---I'm sorry about your dad. This is such a hard time! My sis was the CALS for my mom and I just visited when I could, but I was there for the last 2 weeks. I think she went through all the stages of the disease in only 13 months. She was completely bedridden at then end with only a tiny bit of motion in her hands and a little ability to verbalize and eat. Even though she had a feeding tube, she tried to eat instead of use it. She loved her cappucino in the mornings, but it was harder and harder each day. We knew we were really at the end when she could no longer suck the tiniest bit out and she asked for it in the tube.
I was there for a full week and she didn't seem to be "going anywhere". But then she got much more agitated and emotional and was weaker each day. We were continually surprised that she was with us the next morning. We were giving her a few drops of morphine every 4 hours to help her breathe better. Her breathing was very shallow---only the very tops of her lungs were clear; the rest was full of fluid. The last few days we gave her some type of eyedrop by mouth that dries up the secretions so she didn't have so much fluid rattling around in her throat. From Tuesday to Saturday she really didn't wake up. Tues and Weds. she might open her eyes ifyou spoke to her, but not respond. Or sometimes grunt---like when my bro. asked if she wanted to hear him play the banjo! I think from Wednesday p.m. until Saturday afternoon, she didn't awaken at all. She died on a Saturday when my sister and I were with her. She just took longer breaks between breaths and was gone in a minute or two. It was such a surprise when we had expected it any moment for a whole week! But it was peaceful and not painful. She had been so scared when diagnosed that it would be horrible. Hospice was very helpful in terms of keeping her comfortable---morphine to help breathing, drops, and also an anti-anxiety med.
We read and re-read the information on dying to find out what it would be like and it didn't really help. She had so many of the signs that it was imminent for a week that we were very much on edge! So I hope this helps for you to know what it was like for us and it can be very peaceful. Just love him all you can and try to remember to touch him and hug him. One of the things we regret most is that we didn't actually put our arms around her and hug her when she was bedridden the last 6 weeks. Sure, we touched and stroked and massaged hands and feet, and got in bed with her and cuddled, but no real hugs. And she just loved having her hair brushed, HARD! lol. I thought I was going to draw blood, but it made her smile like nothing else!
No one could answer our questions satisfactorily and tell us what would happen. I wish my mom had prepared me for the death of a loved one in advance. But you can only live it. Just love him all you can and cry with him if he cries, laugh with him, and just enjoy every minute with him because nothing will ever be the same again.
God bless your family. And everyone else here on this forum.
Sara
I was there for a full week and she didn't seem to be "going anywhere". But then she got much more agitated and emotional and was weaker each day. We were continually surprised that she was with us the next morning. We were giving her a few drops of morphine every 4 hours to help her breathe better. Her breathing was very shallow---only the very tops of her lungs were clear; the rest was full of fluid. The last few days we gave her some type of eyedrop by mouth that dries up the secretions so she didn't have so much fluid rattling around in her throat. From Tuesday to Saturday she really didn't wake up. Tues and Weds. she might open her eyes ifyou spoke to her, but not respond. Or sometimes grunt---like when my bro. asked if she wanted to hear him play the banjo! I think from Wednesday p.m. until Saturday afternoon, she didn't awaken at all. She died on a Saturday when my sister and I were with her. She just took longer breaks between breaths and was gone in a minute or two. It was such a surprise when we had expected it any moment for a whole week! But it was peaceful and not painful. She had been so scared when diagnosed that it would be horrible. Hospice was very helpful in terms of keeping her comfortable---morphine to help breathing, drops, and also an anti-anxiety med.
We read and re-read the information on dying to find out what it would be like and it didn't really help. She had so many of the signs that it was imminent for a week that we were very much on edge! So I hope this helps for you to know what it was like for us and it can be very peaceful. Just love him all you can and try to remember to touch him and hug him. One of the things we regret most is that we didn't actually put our arms around her and hug her when she was bedridden the last 6 weeks. Sure, we touched and stroked and massaged hands and feet, and got in bed with her and cuddled, but no real hugs. And she just loved having her hair brushed, HARD! lol. I thought I was going to draw blood, but it made her smile like nothing else!
No one could answer our questions satisfactorily and tell us what would happen. I wish my mom had prepared me for the death of a loved one in advance. But you can only live it. Just love him all you can and cry with him if he cries, laugh with him, and just enjoy every minute with him because nothing will ever be the same again.
God bless your family. And everyone else here on this forum.
Sara