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Poet Chistopher Robin

Distinguished member
Joined
Mar 17, 2012
Messages
147
Reason
PALS
Diagnosis
06/2011
Country
UK
State
Tyne and Wear
City
Newcastle upon Tyne
I’ve actually got copd, which means my lungs are gone, als, plus a small cancer growth in my back at the left and a hernia on my right, then my sister in law is dying from cancer, mother in law was cremated just six months back yet we’ve had my wife’s alcoholic brother in to this actual hospice looking for my wife twice this week, wanting yet more cash for yet more drink, I know he has drank since aged 13 but he needs a massive shake up from God, he has no sense of decency and no scruples at all such is the state he has stooped down too. Coming in here hunting my wife, his sister, looking for cash for yet more drink playing on her low state of mind, like a wolf.

If i could only talk normally i would tell him where to get off

I know he cannot help himself but he has drank for six months solid since his mother’s death, using that as an excuse. He abused his poor mom financially and now he thinks his sisters will keep him in drink, my wife has enough on her plate keeping her job down and coming in here to see me as also do her two sisters, the younger with heart problems, the older with cancer.

He thought nothing of showing himself up in front of five of my friends, luckily all Christians and three knowing of him, any Christians reading this please pray that god will give him an almighty wakeup or shake up call, as he is already on warfin for his blood, and we often wonder how we cope, my wife is being incredibly strong through all this without him adding to all the pressure
 
i hope she tells him no , she is way to busy dealing with real life and death , he now has to do it on his own ... sorry you are having such trouble added on to you and your wife ... i wouldnt of even let him in the house
 
My heart just aches for you. I grew up in an alcoholic home, married in to one (as did my sister), so i know what its like. the only thing that stopped them, unfortunately, was death. my prayers for your family today.

be strong and courageous... joshua 1:6-9
 
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Robin, I am so sorry for what you and your wife are going through. Is there any way they (Hospice) can keep this man out? Dear God, he needs help! No....first he needs God! I will be praying on this end!

Irma
 
Christopher, I'm so sorry you guys are dealing with an alcoholic family member at this point in your lives.
 
Christopher, he sounds like my BIL, who died 2 years ago of liver failure... he was in his 40's...

and as much as you think he can change his behavior, he can't and he won't... I would give him $10 and tell him never to come back, unless he was sober, or you'll call the police.

Have you ever heard of "wet brain"? It's not pretty, and I can almost guarantee you that if he doesn't already have it, he will.

Don't let him in the door again... and hang tough my friend.
 
Time for some tough love from your wife. She needs to cut him from your lives. He will suck the life and all your money from you both and not give it a thought if you and she let him. To give him your money makes you and she Enablers. Shut him out no matter how hard it is to hear him cry. He's sick. You and your wife can't help him. Only he can help himself.
 
Oh what a mess--you and your wife do not need to deal with him on top of everything else. Is there anyone like a family friend of yours who can step up anad tell him to GET OUT AND DONT COME BACK to help protect the two of you. you guys need to be focused on yourselves right now, he is being a selfish jerk. I am so sorry...
 
So sorry Robin for all the junk going on, I agree with Marta, your wife needs to let him know to get out and stay out, she really does need to deal with that on top of eveerything else. Prayers being said for all. Hang in there, and put him in HIS hands. Hoping you are doing ok. {HUG}
 
Oh, Christopher! I'm so sorry! I think hospice should be able to limit visitors. My prayers are with you all!

Jen
 
Christopher, the hospice facility here (US) told me that they could keep someone from visiting (entering facility) if instructed to do so or at their own discretion, if necessary. I was was dealing with a crazy in-law problem. Perhaps, as someone else suggested, you can communicate with the staff regarding this issue and have him barred.

I don't know why the lunatics all show up during such times!
 
So sorry you are dealing with so much .This is a problem your wife needs to address .She is an enabler .
She need to get an order of protection ,and bar him from your facility ASAP.
Once she get rid of the parasite your wife will be better off

I believe in prayer but this guy needs more like a twelve step programme .I have zero patients for drunks .Selfish
God help you all
Patricia
 
It's like I told my husband's aunt, my brother-in-law was always borrowing money from her for liquor, when she was telling us about it I told her she should have stopped and bought it for him it would be the same thing since she knows that is what he is going to do. She is a very strong older Church of Christ but she had never thought about it that way but if your giving money to someone and you know what they are going to do with it you might as well buy it yourself.
 
Chris this is awful for you and your wife. As someone else mentioned, I am sure you can ask the hospice to stop any unwanted visitors. When Mark was in the hospice the lovely reception staff told some of the visitors who were likely to overstay their welcome that visits were limited to 15 minutes or on a couple of days that Mark wasnt seeing visitors that day.
 
I am so sorry you have the extra stress. Tell her don't be his enabler, cut him off. "Tough Love"Sounds like he needs to mourn his mom and not cover up those feelings. Maybe a family intervention is needed, invite him over for some reason and have everybody read him their letters of how they see it and how his driving is also effecting their lives. Tell him you need him to be striaght and help his family. I am so sorry you guys are going through this also. I swear that women (your wife) is a saint.
 
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