Okay, I think what I have is an example of the “wait a year”type of decision To make. None of this is about ALS and it’s a dull read besides, so consider moving along
Its the house, and it’s so d%@! complicated it makes my head hurt.
My current home is at least a few things a home should be (in my opinion). It’s below my means. I’ve always felt that whenever possible, you need a mortgage that you can either make double payments on if you opt to do so, or you can weather loss of income without having to move. Check and check.
It has space. When you carry 4 cats and a dog, a tiny wonder will not do. I have some plans to narrow the heard by natural attrition, as a few a these animals are seniors and I tell myself maybe I won’t do another dog, but I’ll likely end up with two dogs so they can keep each other company while I work when this one and some of the cats pass on. So space, and my fenced in yard matters.
Then we have the other side.
The location is both an advantage and a problem. It’s very convenient, next to the major freeways, etc. The neighborhood is sub par. I’m an urban bear and have never much cared. However, being single is making me care more. Brian was not a big man, but he was a fierce one and adept with his rifles besides ( he was trained in same, not just a guns guy). Years ago, he scared off home invaders ( in another house, not this one) and made the news. I’m not at all saying I live in fear, but I think I underestimated how much safer his pre ALS presence made me feel.
I have a full grounds service here, not just some snow removal because there are hills here I literally cannot navigate with a lawn mower of any caliber. The hill from the front is insane. My late nephew did it once, and at 6’2 basically said never again without better equipment. The amazing Brian did it weekly.The mortgage is so affordable it’s not the end of the world by any means, but that’s some cash output monthly all year long for sure.
The garage is detached. In this climate, that’s brutal In winter some nights. I also don’t like walking it in the dark at night. If I stay, I’m going to floodlight the back yard.
The memories are a pro and a con. Our life together started here. We left from and returned to this house after our wedding. We moved our first dogs together into this house. Then we all know the other side so well I don’t need to elaborate. Brian died in a bed on the floors he had laid four years earlier, overlooking the garage he built, unable to move a muscle below his neck. I’m sitting a few Feet from where he passed.
In writing this, I think maybe I have made my decision. Weather, new job and all it will take me until Spring to do anything about it and it will be complicated and short term costly but I think I need to sell. I had thought for a long while that I would probably stay but now I think likely not.