Hi,
I want to respond to is the fear - for Cornelius and others - "What I am trying to do is change my thinking. That no matter what it is, to make the best out of everyday. To not let fear overwhelm and paralyze me."
I agree with Jeff, and my ALS story is much the same, except that I am still being tested for MMN, as the second opinion to ALS DX. My right hand cramping started early in 2002, and my finger began to bend. It stopped moving in 2006, I fell many times. Oct 31, 2006 ALS DX. ALS clinic Dec, 2007 EMG 3 limbs positive for ALS, blood work no problems, but I have been on IVIG since Jan 2007. I may go off after another EMG/NVC due to a bit more progression anyway. Twitching in right hand started a few years ago - don't remember when. My progression is super slow.
That being said, the reason I am writing is about fear: MY youngest sister died at 22 - car accident (graduated as a teacher, posthumously 3 months later.) I lost 6 years in mourning, stopped my masters, delayed having kids etc. etc. What was the point?
I healed - moved on when I became grateful for her. All of my mom's siblings died of cancer before age 60. My cousin died of cancer. My mom had Parkinson and cancers (2) died after 5 years of dementia and cancer. My oldest sister died after living with /fighting cancer for 12 years(breast to bone cancer). My other two sisters are breast cancer survivors (11 years and almost 2 years.) I don't have it. - my annual tests are this week.
Two weeks ago my husband was DX with prostate cancer. He will have surgery on April 2. My sister has surgery April 1. Please put us in your prayers also. Again I see, and in my most sincere and humble way, I pray for gratitude. So much of life is not in our control, but gratitude may be. For us we have two wonderful daughters and a new wonderful son in law. Our daughters are college grads, and both are back to get their teaching degrees. I had 36 years of teaching, and finished an Ed. Specialist and1/2 toward the Ph.D, before I had to stop. My husband got to be the home parent.
So I wish for you as you go through finding what's wrong that you can note everyday what is right and open yourself to peace. I wish you all a very blessed Holy Week. Sincerely, Peg