Jrzygrl
Senior member
- Joined
- Feb 14, 2017
- Messages
- 751
- Reason
- Lost a loved one
- Diagnosis
- 08/2014
- Country
- US
- State
- NJ
- City
- X
Thursday was the one year anniversary of my husband's passing. It was a rough day. Truthfully it's been a rough week. My MIL and SIL are coming up today. They have still not seen his headstone. Long delays getting it in place - thank you, COVID.
I still can't put into words to others what this journey has been like, but I think you all here will understand. I grieve the loss of his life both before and after his death, if that makes sense. I look back at what those last few years were like and all I can say is "Why?". Why did this happen to such a good person? Someone so full of life, dreams, plans. I know he hated living the way he was. As hard as we tried to make things as "normal" as possible, it just wasn't.
I'm still trying to put the pieces back together, with one big one missing. I'm far from feeling whole again. I've made some progress, but it feels like it's a two steps forward, one step back dance. I feel very alone at times, even when people are around. Other times, I'm fine with solitude.
I promised him I would be OK afterward - and I will be. It's just taking me a while to get there.
Love to you all. ❤
I still can't put into words to others what this journey has been like, but I think you all here will understand. I grieve the loss of his life both before and after his death, if that makes sense. I look back at what those last few years were like and all I can say is "Why?". Why did this happen to such a good person? Someone so full of life, dreams, plans. I know he hated living the way he was. As hard as we tried to make things as "normal" as possible, it just wasn't.
I'm still trying to put the pieces back together, with one big one missing. I'm far from feeling whole again. I've made some progress, but it feels like it's a two steps forward, one step back dance. I feel very alone at times, even when people are around. Other times, I'm fine with solitude.
I promised him I would be OK afterward - and I will be. It's just taking me a while to get there.
Love to you all. ❤