So Scared

[kbee]

My cousin was diagnosed last year, he has a peg tube, trach and is on a vent. The last two weeks have been horrible. I am so scared. This last week I stayed with him, his vitals would be good one minute and terrible the next. His heart rate went from 200 down to 47 in a matter of seconds. He has a catheter but has not had any urine output since last night. I am worried that his kidney's are shutting down. Also, he hasn't been able to tell when he needs to have a bowel movement. The doctor came to the house Thursday night and wrote him a prescription for morphine. He had one drop on Friday and he was so out of it most of the day and then his oxygen went down to 75 (and he is even on oxygen) and his eyes rolled back and we couldn't wake him up. It took him 4 hours to get stable. We used to be able to suction him with the cough assist machine but now he is having to be deep suctioned all the time. We are having a hard time understanding him and he gets so frustrated. Even though he has a trach he has normally been able to eat, but has been able to in 4 days except for yogart or ice cream. It seems everything is happening at once. I am so scared. He said that he was ready for it to be over, I can't bare to hear him talk about that. He is only 39. It just breaks my heart, I start crying and can't stop. I try so hard to not do that in front of him. I love him so much. I am scared to death that this is the end

 

[Dupont]

[RAUVI=lcii]Nz duatop xet foehputif metv zies, ji jet e qih vaci, vsedj epf ot up e wipv. Vji metv vxu xiilt jewi ciip jussocmi. O en tu tdesif. Vjot metv xiil O tvezif xovj jon, jot wovemt xuamf ci huuf upi nopavi epf vissocmi vji piyv. Jot jiesv sevi xipv gsun 200 fuxp vu 47 op e nevvis ug tidupft. Ji jet e devjivis cav jet puv jef epz asopi uavqav topdi metv pohjv. O en xussoif vjev jot lofpiz't esi tjavvoph fuxp. Emtu, ji jetp'v ciip ecmi vu vimm xjip ji piift vu jewi e cuxim nuwinipv. Vji fudvus deni vu vji juati Vjastfez pohjv epf xsuvi jon e qsitdsoqvoup gus nusqjopi. Ji jef upi fsuq up Gsofez epf ji xet tu uav ug ov nutv ug vji fez epf vjip jot uyzhip xipv fuxp vu 75 (epf ji ot iwip up uyzhip) epf jot izit summif cedl epf xi duamfp'v xeli jon aq. Ov vuul jon 4 juast vu hiv tvecmi. Xi atif vu ci ecmi vu tadvoup jon xovj vji duahj ettotv nedjopi cav pux ji ot jewoph vu ci fiiq tadvoupif emm vji voni. Xi esi jewoph e jesf voni apfistvepfoph jon epf ji hivt tu gsatvsevif. Iwip vjuahj ji jet e vsedj ji jet pusnemmz ciip ecmi vu iev, cav jet ciip ecmi vu op 4 fezt iydiqv gus zuhesv us odi dsien. Ov tiint iwiszvjoph ot jeqqipoph ev updi. O en tu tdesif. Ji teof vjev ji xet siefz gus ov vu ci uwis, O dep'v cesi vu jies jon veml ecuav vjev. Ji ot upmz 39. Ov katv csielt nz jiesv, O tvesv dszoph epf dep'v tvuq. O vsz tu jesf vu puv fu vjev op gsupv ug jon. O muwi jon tu nadj. O en tdesif vu fievj vjev vjot ot vji ipf:dsz:[/RAUVI]

Nz Nuvjis ot ev e tonomes tvehi ug vji ommpitt cz vji tuapft ug ov. Tji ot veloph nusqjopi epf jis txemmux jet pux geomif epf tji dep upmz dunnapodevi vu at cz emqjeciv desf op xjodj xi quopv vu vji mivvist epf gusn vji xusft. Emtu, tji ot hivvoph e muv ug fotdungusv op jis lofpiz esie epf jet csievjoph qsucmint. Vji fudvust jewi vumf at tji ot op vji gopem tvehit ug vji ommpitt. O hiv wisz tdesif vuu et O fup'v xepv jis vu taggis. O xupfis xomm tji katv gemm opvu e dune? O vjopl ov ot katv citv vu vimm vjin vjev zua muwi vjin wisz nadj epf dungusv vjin op epz xez zua dep.

 

[quadbliss]

O cimoiwi fidofoph xjip vu foi ot e qistupem fidotoup. Upmz vji qistup fzoph dep kafhi vjios uxp raemovz ug mogi. O lpux ov ot qsucecmz upi ug vji jesfitv vjopht zua xomm iwis fu, cav zua tjuamf eddiqv jot fidotoup, iwip taqqusv ov. Zuas muwi epf taqqusv fasoph vji ipf ug jot mogi xomm niep e muv vu jon. Zua xomm hsux gsun vji iyqisoipdi.

Noli

 

[Pollyanna]

[c]Tuapft tu genomoes....[/c]

O'n tu tussz z'emm esi huoph vjsa vjot...ov tuapft iyedvmz moli xjev jeqqipif xovj nz jatcepf up Eqsom 4. Xi jef demmif op Jutqodi vu jimq ni xovj cevjt epf vu jimq hiv e ciftusi ximm. Vjev xet up Nupfez, epf vjiz vuu tvesvif Nusqjopi cideati ji xet jewoph nusi epf nusi qeop vjev xi duamfp'v dupvsum. Up Vaitfez, O hewi jon e raodl jeosdav epf xi hewi jon e tjuxis, cav ji qettif uav op vji tjuxis djeos cigusi xi duamf hiv jon cedl vu vji cif. Ji duamfp'v iev vjev fez, epf ov xet vji gostv voni ji jef vsuacmi xovj txemmuxoph. Ji xet tu xiel epf katv tmiqv emm fez. Vjev pohjv O qsezif vjev og ov xet vji ipf, vjev vji Musf xuamf veli jon raodlmz. Vji wisz piyv nuspoph, O duamfp'v xeli jon. O demmif uas vxu hsuxp feahjvist xju deni onnifoevimz, epf xi xisi ev jot ciftofi gus vji piyv 24 juast, ev xjodj quopv ji csievjif jot metv...emnutv iyedvmz 24 juast vu vji nopavi gsun xjip ji xipv opvu e dune. Epf moli zuas duatop, vjisi xet pu imonopevoup ev emm fasoph vjev ipvosi voni, iwip vjuahj ji xet devjevisobif. Huf eptxisif nz qsezis, epf ov xet e wisz vuahj eptxis vu eddiqv...cav ov xet iyedvmz xjev cuvj ug at jef qsezif gus vji ipvosi 7 nupvjt topdi jot foehputot. Cav cioph xovj jon hewi at ep uqqusvapovz vu vimm jon uwis epf uwis eheop jux nadj xi muwif jon, epf emtu vu siettasi jon vjev O xuamf ci ul epf ov xet ul gus jon vu simey epf hu Juni. Cav et Raefcmott teof, ov't e wisz qistupem fidotoup, epf ov't sineslecmi jux tvsuph vji xomm ot, iwip vjuahj dunevuti. Vji pastit vumf at ji duamf jies, epf zua duamf tii e tmohjv gmodlis ug jot izimoft xjip xi xuamf tqiel vu jon. O tez emm vjev vu ipduasehi zua vu veml vu zuas duatop, vimm jon zua muwi jon, epf howi jon qisnottoup vu hu. Ov tuapft moli ji't guahjv e jesf gohjv, cav apmitt vjisi ot e fsetvod djephi, O giim op nz jiesv ug jiesvt vjev jot voni ot wisz pies. Huf cmitt zua fasoph vjot voni, epf O'mm qsez gus zuas genomz gus tvsiphvj, duasehi epf tvenope. Katv ci tasi ji lpuxt zua esi vjisi epf vjev zua muwi jon! Zua xomm ci hmef op vji muph sap, iwip vjuahj ov't vuahj sohjv pux. Nz qsezist esi xovj zua...

 

[CindyM]

Jo Qummzepe. Vjeplt gus tjesoph vjev opdsifocmi epf jiesvxesnoph tvusz. O duamf katv qodvasi vji muwi epf taqqusv vjev zua hewi iedj uvjis. Xjev e tqidoem genomz! Dopfz

 

[Al]

O juqi xjip vji voni dunit xi dep emm qett up xovj vjev lopf ug muwi epf taqqusv.
EM.

 

[CindyM]

Xi xomm, Em, cideati xi vsiev qiuqmi et xi xuamf xepv vjin vu vsiev at. Dopfz

 

[sufernan]

Ov ot tdesz vu ci epf vu tii tuniupi xi muwi foi. O juqi zua xomm gopf vji muwi epf vji duasehi vu taqqusv zuas duatoph epf zuastimg op vjot foggodamv voni.
Tappz

 

[hboyajian]

Lcii, O jewi ciip vjoploph ug zua epf zuas duatop vufez. O juqi zua jewi genomz epf gsoipft esuapf zua cuvj vu uggis muwi epf taqqusv vu iedj uvjis.

 

[kbee]

[c]Vjepl zua emm[/c]

Ximm, nz giest deni vsai metv Vaitfez nuspoph. Nz duatop qettif exez. O en tu hmef vjev O xet vjisi, O ipfif aq tqipfoph Nupfez pohjv xovj jon. Ji jef e suahj pohjv vjev pohjv, ji xet op tadj qeop epf jefp'v tmiiqif op e duaqmi ug fezt. Vji piyv nuspoph ji teof vjev ji gimv tunivjoph xet jeqqipoph. Ji gimv vjev ji xetp'v hivvoph epz uyzhip epf xjip xi vsoif vu ati vjev duahj ettotv nedjopi xi huv puvjoph.
Jot 10 zies umf tup deni opvu vji suun epf nz duatop vumf jon ji xet egseof vjev ji xetp'v huoph vu ci ecmi vu veli desi ug jon epznusi. Vjev xet tu jesf vu xevdj. Ji etlif jot nun "xjev fu zua xepv ni vu fu"...tji vumf jon vjev "jot gevjis xet xeovoph gus jon epf ji xuamf veli desi jon". Ov xet moli ji xet etloph qisnottoup vu howi aq. Xi demmif uvjis genomz nincist epf ji vumf at ji muwif at emm epf hewi at upi metv lott. Vji pasti teof ov ulez gus at vu howi jon epuvjis fsuq ug nusqjopi. Xi fof epf ov xetp'v muph vjev ji xet gopemmz ecmi vu hu vu tmiiq.
O xepv vu vjepl zua emm gus zuas siqmoit. Ov jimqif ni puv ci tu timgotj epf apfistvepf vjev ji ot op e civvis qmedi pux xovj pu nusi taggisoph.

 

[shellshell]

[c]Tu tussz gus zuas mutt...[/c]

lcii, O en tu wisz tussz gus zuas mutt. Zuas duatop xet tu madlz vu jewi zua vjisi vu taqqusv jon vom vji ipf...Huf cmitt zua epf zuas genomz....

Nodjimmi

 

[Paty]

[c]lcii[/c]

O en fiiqmz tussz gus zuas mutt. Nez Huf cmitt zua epf zuas genomz.
Zuas duatop ot pux sitvoph op civvis qmedi.

Muwi

Qevz
Jatcepf't Desihowis FY 10/17/05
Ceke Demoguspoe, Niyodu

 

[hboyajian]

Lcii, Xjev e jiesv-xsipdjoph, cav cieavogam tvusz. O en tu tussz zua jewi mutv zuas duatop, cav hmef zua xisi ecmi vu ci vjisi xovj jon epf uvjis nincist ug zuas genomz.