Larrytbm
Distinguished member
- Joined
- May 13, 2017
- Messages
- 102
- Reason
- Lost a loved one
- Diagnosis
- 05/2017
- Country
- US
- State
- TX
- City
- Austin
This will probably be my last post on the forum. At the time of Eileen's funeral I weighed 122 lbs, I am now at 134 lbs. I'm not sure if it is just my nature or my strong belief in God, but even before the funeral, I felt that God did not want me to waste the rest of my life in grief. I made it a point to remove all the medical equipment associated with ALS and I feel I was fortunate in not having to be a caregiver for many years, locked into a set routine. As a side note, I paid $22k for the handicapped van in June and Mobility Works gave me $24k in October since I didn't want to deal with potential buyers. They just sold it on Friday for $40k.
I replaced the special RV, downsizing to a smaller unit and I did volunteer jobs in October and November. That was good for both my physical and mental attitude and got me out of the house. But my biggest change is that somehow I have reconnected with someone I dated in college, 50 yrs ago. We are totally different people than we were 50 yrs ago, yet we have a strong connection. In fact we are now engaged. She is a semi-retired pastor so we both have a strong commitment to serving our God, but in very different ways. And we are committed to helping each other in that service.
I can't tell anyone else how to deal with grief, but if you believe in God and there is a plan that we don't and can't understand. Yet God wouldn't want anyone to waste the rest of their life, then getting beyond grief is what he wants for us. And that is what we should be striving for as quickly as possible. I remember a simple saying that has been with me forever. "Worry is like sitting in a rocking chair, it will keep you busy but it won't get you anywhere". The same can be said for grief.
I replaced the special RV, downsizing to a smaller unit and I did volunteer jobs in October and November. That was good for both my physical and mental attitude and got me out of the house. But my biggest change is that somehow I have reconnected with someone I dated in college, 50 yrs ago. We are totally different people than we were 50 yrs ago, yet we have a strong connection. In fact we are now engaged. She is a semi-retired pastor so we both have a strong commitment to serving our God, but in very different ways. And we are committed to helping each other in that service.
I can't tell anyone else how to deal with grief, but if you believe in God and there is a plan that we don't and can't understand. Yet God wouldn't want anyone to waste the rest of their life, then getting beyond grief is what he wants for us. And that is what we should be striving for as quickly as possible. I remember a simple saying that has been with me forever. "Worry is like sitting in a rocking chair, it will keep you busy but it won't get you anywhere". The same can be said for grief.