Hi Roisin, I know we have been talking privately and I hope the advice I have given you is helping in some ways. Everybody is saying the same thing here I see, the despair and fear of whats coming is gripping at the beginning, but in time you learn to adjust to the changes, and to make some changes that help. In turn you will find friends and family will be a great help to you and this forum is without question the best source of advice on medical and emotional worries.
I will say my best advice yet, Make some special memories. Do things your mum enjoys and some nights, not all, but some nights she will go to bed with a smile on her face. Your kids bring you so much joy, so bring her some in the times ahead. As hard as it is for you, and they do say for some its harder on the family, I just think how awful it must be for them, to lose their independance and to ask your children to wash you and dress you etc. My mam said to me the other day, you have seen my whole body now, sights you shouldnt see, but I just said, I dont look. When we shower her, I always wrap the towel around her while I do her hair, so she is not sitting there exposed, she hates that. I know its about dignity for her. You will in time learn little things that will help her.
As these few weeks pass you will come into your own routine and treasure the little things, the trip to the shops, spending all day infront of the tv watching films and eating chocs etc...
Im thinking of you, take care x