newday
New member
- Joined
- Sep 28, 2010
- Messages
- 2
- Reason
- PALS
- Diagnosis
- 10/1992
- Country
- US
- State
- NY
- City
- Westbury
Hello All. I have been dealing with the devastating effects of ALS for 19 years now. I would like to share this letter that I recently wrote to ALS itself.
Dear ALS,
I just wanted to drop you a few lines to tell you how I honestly feel about you. I despise you because you almost destroyed my life. You took away my dreams and you nearly took away all of my hope. You destroyed my family especially my children. Because of you my husband moved out and our children followed him. You chased away all of my friends and you left me with nobody. I was so lonely. You frightened everybody in my life including me. I couldn't understand why people wanted to stay away from me but now I know it was because of you. People don't handle death and dying very well. Imagine how scared my young children got when they found out about you, you bastard. You break up friendships. You paralyzed all of my muscles until I was totally bedridden. You threaten to take away my ability to eat and drink. I said it from the very beginning that I don't want any tubes to keep me alive. You are slowly taking away my ability to speak and you want to leave me mute. I think that's the cruelest thing to happen to anybody. Then it's impossible to communicate when you are taking away my ability to speak. ALS I really hate you. I get so sad when I am trying to speak to my children and my granddaughter and they don't know what I am saying to them. ALS you are so cruel. I wish you would go away because nobody wants you in their lives. You are so mean and you are the monster in all my nightmares and I hate you so much. I've been fighting with you for the last nineteen years now and I believe that I am winning that fight. You see I become more encouraged with each passing day. There's a lot to be said for outliving Hospice three times because I am winning this battle. I have my children back in my life again, the only thing is they are young men now. I've learned something about hope and that is when there is life there is always hope. I have hope in my life again and you can't take it away from me ever again. I have hopes and dreams back in my life and you can't ever take them back. Then some of my old friends came back and I have made so many new friends now. ALS I'm not afraid of you anymore. I am a very tough person and I can take whatever you hand me. Then I don't give up very easily and I'll fight you until the very end of me. I live each day to the fullest. Then I don't take anything for granted anymore. I try to live in the moment and I never waste time. I have a better appreciation for life now. I have so many blessings in my life and so much to live for. I love life and I am so happy and I'm very content too. This disease has made me into a better human being. I am many things to many people. First I'm a wife and a mother and a grandmother and a daughter and a sister and an aunt and a cousin and a friend. I am in a good place right now and you can't get me down because I won't let you it's that simple. You can't make me feel bitter. You can't hurt me anymore and I believe with my whole heart that I will beat you in this battle.
From, NEWDAY - My letter to a terminal disease
Dear ALS,
I just wanted to drop you a few lines to tell you how I honestly feel about you. I despise you because you almost destroyed my life. You took away my dreams and you nearly took away all of my hope. You destroyed my family especially my children. Because of you my husband moved out and our children followed him. You chased away all of my friends and you left me with nobody. I was so lonely. You frightened everybody in my life including me. I couldn't understand why people wanted to stay away from me but now I know it was because of you. People don't handle death and dying very well. Imagine how scared my young children got when they found out about you, you bastard. You break up friendships. You paralyzed all of my muscles until I was totally bedridden. You threaten to take away my ability to eat and drink. I said it from the very beginning that I don't want any tubes to keep me alive. You are slowly taking away my ability to speak and you want to leave me mute. I think that's the cruelest thing to happen to anybody. Then it's impossible to communicate when you are taking away my ability to speak. ALS I really hate you. I get so sad when I am trying to speak to my children and my granddaughter and they don't know what I am saying to them. ALS you are so cruel. I wish you would go away because nobody wants you in their lives. You are so mean and you are the monster in all my nightmares and I hate you so much. I've been fighting with you for the last nineteen years now and I believe that I am winning that fight. You see I become more encouraged with each passing day. There's a lot to be said for outliving Hospice three times because I am winning this battle. I have my children back in my life again, the only thing is they are young men now. I've learned something about hope and that is when there is life there is always hope. I have hope in my life again and you can't take it away from me ever again. I have hopes and dreams back in my life and you can't ever take them back. Then some of my old friends came back and I have made so many new friends now. ALS I'm not afraid of you anymore. I am a very tough person and I can take whatever you hand me. Then I don't give up very easily and I'll fight you until the very end of me. I live each day to the fullest. Then I don't take anything for granted anymore. I try to live in the moment and I never waste time. I have a better appreciation for life now. I have so many blessings in my life and so much to live for. I love life and I am so happy and I'm very content too. This disease has made me into a better human being. I am many things to many people. First I'm a wife and a mother and a grandmother and a daughter and a sister and an aunt and a cousin and a friend. I am in a good place right now and you can't get me down because I won't let you it's that simple. You can't make me feel bitter. You can't hurt me anymore and I believe with my whole heart that I will beat you in this battle.
From, NEWDAY - My letter to a terminal disease
