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anneinma

Active member
Joined
Aug 6, 2007
Messages
67
Reason
PALS
Country
US
State
MA
City
barnstable
I signed on to this forum less than a year ago when my husband was diagnosed. I found this forum scary and have not been back until now.

My beloved husband began displaying symptoms in about April 2007. He had a draggy foot and was becoming weaker. He was an active 71. He had some breathing problems. We went through many months of excrutiating mis-diagnoses. He was diagnosed in August with a 2nd opinion in September.

My husband was a very active man, always building, working on his house and yard - a loving husband and dad. He gradually could do little mainly due to breathing and weakness. He lost 50 pounds (muscle). He was an avid reader, historian and was writing a book.

By spring my husband was pretty much confined to home based on panic attacks, weakness, loss of breath. Our daughter was going on an exchange to Spain and my husband insisted on keeping our plans to go to Mexico which we did every spring. He knew he would be in a wheelchair and like a trooper he went and we had a nice trip although somewhat bittersweet. Wheelchair, B pap, and good attitude.

We returned on a Sunday. On Monday my husband rcvd. copies of his published memoirs. He read emails from our daughter in Spain. He called old friends about his book. On Tuesday after our peaceful cocktail time he passed away. Very suddenly. The doctors think probably pulmonary embolism but they don't know. Possibly brought on by the plane trip but my husband did tell a friend in Mexico that he knew he would go soon. He gave me that trip as an amazing gift. The day he died he told me he would not be walking much longer and that he thought he would die in his sleep. He would have absolutely hated not being able to walk and having to depend on me.. We had gone through a week in Mexico with him in a wheelchair and that was part of his sacrifice to spend a week together that will always be in my memory. He wanted me to remember him on a beach in Mexico rather than on machines at home.

For those of you who are going through this agonizing disease, my prayers are with you. There is no answer as to what will happen next. Live each day to its fullest. Savor every moment with your loved one. Each day is part of the journey.
 
my deepest sympathy for the loss of your soul mate. i too have a husband with als, 58 and on hospice now. i treasure each day with him and pray daily for cure for als.

God bless you and take care of yourself,
Patty
 
so sorry about ur husband. i pray every night for god to take me in my sleep but than thnk him every morning for giving me another day. i wish i could enjoy my time but im so embarass to go out
 
going out

My husband was a great socializer when he was healthy. When he got sick he also was embarassed about going out so I would take him in the car away from where we lived and we would have lunch. He loved seeing people and being out without being recognized. Is there is someone that can take you out to lunch?
 
Anne,

Thanks for sharing this story of your husband with us. This has touched my heart and I ask God even now to wrap his loving arms around you and let you feel the peace and comfort that only he can give you. May God's Blessings be with you always.
 
i dont eat out cuz i make a mess sort of like when my son was little. i wouldnt take him to resturants now its me. i eat by my self alone. but mayb my son will take for a ride or some where. thnk for advise. take care n so sorry
 
Anne,

I'm so terribly sorry for your loss. It is so wonderful that you were able to build memories with your husband during his last days.

I hope you find peace in knowing he is in a better place.
 
What a nice tribute to your husband. I was able to imagine what a good man he was, and what a blessing to you he was. I am so sorry that you have lost him.
Laurel
 
I am so sorry for your loss. You have my deepest sympathy.

God bless,
 
Anne,

I am so sorry for the lost of your husband. He sounded like a wonderful man.
Please take care of yourself, may you hold onto those memories forever.
 
Hi anneinma! Wonderful post. My condolences to you, and may your beloved rest in peace. I am so thrilled you guys were directed by our Father to spend time together to the end. What perfect timing, and the wonderful things you'll did together. That is such a blessing! Isn't it strange how Als takes you at the end. Your husband had a peaceful departure. He is with his Father, where there is no more pain, and no morer Als, and yet he is with you always, watching over you. God bless you, and thanks for sharing such a beautiful tribute with us!

Irma
 
Hello Anneinma- I am so sorry for your loss. We can all learn a thing or two from how your husband handled his disease. Sounds like even in his last weeks he continued to think of his family and your needs. Cindy
 
Hello Anneimna, This was a really inspiring and beautiful piece you wrote. I think my mum is thinking the same, she has brought all of her kids together, some live abroad, and we are all taking a family holiday together this week, she has booked an all inclusive hotel so that my sisters do not have to be spending all week on the kids, she has spent a lot of money but as she said she cant take it with her,and she wants to see us all enjoy it. I think she too is preparing for the end? Its sad to watch but I think as a mother, as your husband felt as a husband, he wants to make sure he is doing all he can for his loved ones, and at the same time creating some special memories so that not all of our memories are filled with medication and hospital visits. He went peacefully and im sure happy with his memories of his holiday, thinking of you
 
Thank you all. My husband was a truly loving and caring man. I know he was thinking of me in the end and he was very proud of our daughter.

We also went to an AI resort where we have been together many times and have some very special memories. Our journey together though his illness made me love him more for his courage, strength and love. Our last trip together was an amazing gift that I shall forever treasure.

I am happy for you that your mom is organizing this trip for your family. She sounds like a very special person.
 
Anne,
Your story of your husband is such a moving one and gives us all a glimpse of what lies ahead for we CALS. What a special man your husband was! A true soul-mate. His reading and love of walking sounds so much like my PALS husband. Now your many memories will be your constant companions.
I know what you mean by finding this forum a scary place. It's impossible to fathom life without our PALS.
I wish you peace on this new journey after the passing of your husband. Yours was such a special life together.
Take care and all the best,
Jane
 
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