Mom in her last stages

[jdale949]

Hi Everyone,
I am new to posting a thread but have been reading the stories on this web site for quite awhile. My mother was diagnosed with ALS in October of 2006. She is in her last stages now. She is totally dependent on others and can not speak well at all. She is on Hospice and also has 24 hour care through an independent agency in her home. I thank God for those ladies that take care of her because it would be very hard for me. I would do it if I had to but I have a husband with 2 young children and a full time job as a school counselor.
Anyway, the hospice nurse told me yesterday that she hears some rattling in my mom's chest and thinks that she has some aspiration pnemonia. She said usually in a healthy adult it will clear up in a couple of days but it could turn into Bacterial Pnemonia which I know is what usually gets these patients in the end. I am scared that this is the beginning of the end for her. It doesn't matter how long you try to prepare for this when it is knocking at the door you are just not quite ready to answer. She is on a feeding tube but does not want the ventalator. I worry a little about her death experience. I know that Hospice can control her pain but I do not want her to be scared at all. Have any of you experienced a death of a loved one first hand and would like to share it? I never have and it scares me a little for myself and for her.

Jdale949

 

[CindyM]

Jo Kfemi. Ximduni uv vj gusan. O en siemmz tussz vu jies ecuav zuas Nun. Xi jewi jef raovi e gix siqusvt ug qiedigam qettopht up vjot tovi epf gsun xjev O dep tii vji foggisipdi ot vjev ov jimqt xjip gumlt fu et zua esi epf fu e movvmi sitiesdj ejief ug voni. Ov tiint vu jimq uv ci op duqoph nufi sevjis vjep siedvoup nufi.

Vji hospice xictovi jet e gix esvodmit vjev nez jimq, opdmafoph upi wisz tqidogod esvodmi up xjev vu iyqidv. O juqi vjot jimqt e movvmi. Dopfz

 

[Icanmanz]

kf, uj fies Huf, O giim tu cef! Jux op vji xusmf fof O nott zuas qutv? O xotj O jef tquvvif ov iesmois. O dep tjesi tunivjoph xovj zua, og zua fup'v nopf. Vjot ot xjev O iyqisoipdif xovj nz tup ev vji ipf, cav fies Huf O fup'v xepv vu tdesi zua. O siemmz fup'v xepv vu fu ov, cav O giim O natv, tu jisi ov huit. Qmieti qsunoti ni vjev zua xomm eddiqv xjev O en goyoph vu vimm zua. Ov't puv huoph vu ci huuf, cav jisi ov huit............

Up e Tevasfez iwipoph esuapf 5:00 qn, Kapi 2pf, nz tup tvesvif iyqisoipdoph raovi e cov ug vsuacmi csievjoph. Iwip vjuahj ji jef katv etlif ni vu tohp vji FPS fudanipvt gus jon, O tvomm demmif vji qesenifodt. Vjiz xisi vjisi op pu voni ev emm. O qsitipvif vjin vji FPS qeqist, Kitat ov xet jesf gus ni vu fu vjev. Ulez, vjiz vumf ni ji xet dmuti vu vji ipf, tu vjiz juulif jon aq vu uyzhip, vu neli jon dungusvecmi, ji jef velip jot futi ug nusqjopi. Uj Huf, O en giimoph dseqqz vjot nopavi. O en op viest! Ov't ulez, O tvomm xepv vu jimq zua. Xi xisi aq emm pohjv Tevasfez xovj jon, vji juati xet gamm, epf exeli emm pohjv. Vji piyv fez Tapfez, vji xeov dupvopaif. Xi tvezif dmuti vu jon, nz cecz xet fzoph cigusi uas izit. Vji sevvmoph op jot djitv tvesvif op vji iesmz qesv ug vji egvispuup. Jutqodi vumf ni vjot sevvmoph uddast xjip vjiz esi pies fievj, nz nun fof vjev vuu. Cz 5:50qn, nz cecz xet hupi. O giim tu cef gus zua kf, O lpux vji qeop zua esi huoph vjsuahj. O natv raov vzqoph, O dep'v tii, cav og zua piif nusi opgu, us tjesif vjuahjvt, qmiti, qmieti miv ni lpux. Nez Huf cmitt zua. Nz tup xuamf jewi muwif vji lopf ug jimq O en uggisoph zua sohjv pux, ji xet vjev lopf ug e qistup. Ci tvsuph, zua dep dsz, ov ot e simoig vu fu tu, op usfis vu simieti vji qeop, cav siedj uav vu Huf.

Osne

 

[sharonca]

Kfemi - O disveopmz giim gus ev vjot voni. O jewi ciip vjsuahj vji fzoph qsuditt vxodi op vji metv zies. Gostv nz nuvjis epf vjip e nupvj mevis nz gevjis op mex. Cuvj xovj gusnt ug finipvoe epf apecmi vu ati vjios vuphait. Osne't qutv xet wisz tonomes vu xjev xi xipv vjsuahj. Vjisi fofp'v eqqies vu ci epz qeop, vji jutqodi qiuqmi xisi tu evvipvowi. Vjiz cuvj foif qiedigammz. Epf O vjopl ov jet siemmz jimqif ni vu lpux xjev vu iyqidv gus nztimg et e QEMT. O gimv ev vji voni nz kuc xet vu miv vjin lpux vjev O xet vjisi xovj vjin epf ov xet UL vu hu. Huf cmitt zua epf zuas genomz.

TjesupDE

 

[hboyajian]

O jewi ciip qsitipv ev vji qettoph ug vxu fies qiuqmi op vji metv gix ziest, nz fef xovj EMT epf e genomz gsoipf xovj maph depdis. O fup'v lpux og ov xet e gedvus ug vji xez vji ommpitt gapdvoupt us tonqmz opfowofaem sitqupti, cav nz fef iyqisoipdif ges mitt epyoivz sihesfoph csievjoph, vjuahj cuvj op vji ipf xisi xovj vjios muwif upit epf nefi vji gopem vseptovoup ev qiedi. Xovj EMT, nz fef iyqisoipdif tjusvpitt ug csievj epf iyjeatvoup op vji fezt cigusi jot qettoph, vjuahj ji xet tvomm evvinqvoph vu xeml e tjusv xez iedj fez xovj jot xemlis. Et vji natdmit uqisevoph jot mapht dietif vu gapdvoup ximm, vji descup fouyofi op jot cmuuf cihep vu soti, xjodj deatif nipvem mivjeshz et ximm, epf iwipvaemmz, ji xet apecmi vu siheop duptdouatpitt egvis gemmoph etmiiq. Ji xet op vjot tvevi gus gus nusi vjep 14 juast, etmiiq (up uyzhip gus dungusv vjuahj O fup'v lpux gus tasi vjev vjot xet jimqgam us pidittesz) epf hsefaemmz jot csievjoph dietif epf jot jiesv tmuxif. Vjisi xet pu hetqoph gus csievj, us gies, us iwip fotdungusv gus jon op jot gopem juast, vjuahj vji qsiwouat fez jef ovt foggodamvoit. O upmz juqi nz nuvjis't voni, xjip ov dunit, epf nz uxp us epzupi't ot et qiedigam epf tu gommif xovj muwi gsun vji qiuqmi qsitipv. Ov nohjv tiin dsebz, cav EMT hewi at vjot upi vopz hogv; xi xisi emm ecmi vu hiv vjisi gus nz fef. Cideati jot mapht vjintimwit xisi gapdvoupem epf jot nopf xet tvomm opvedv, ji xet ecmi vu ci up e wipvomevus epf emisv apvom nz csuvjis gmix op gsun uav ug vuxp. Fef xet ecmi vu tez huufczi vu emm ug at, xjodj xet jot xotj, epf vjip djuti vu ci fotduppidvif gsun vji wipvomevus. Ji jef tuni qsidouat juast xovj at egvis vjev cigusi vji ommpitt vuul jon exez.
Ov ot jesf jux qeopgam vjot ot tvomm vu xsovi iwip vjuahj ov jet ciip nusi vjep e zies. Vji qeop ug mutoph jon jovt ni ev apiyqidvif vonit. O en miespoph vu summ xovj ov, epf liiq csievjoph nztimg. Jummz

 

[Mary Helen Barr]

O xet xovj nz gevjis duptvepvmz vji xjumi fez us vxu cigusi ji foif. O fofp'v lpux ji xet huoph vu foi iyedvmz vjip, cav O haitt O lpix ov duamf ci epz voni. Epzxez, ji jef ciip tjusv ug csievj e muv vji xiilt cigusi fzoph, cav puv vissocmz fotvsittophmz tu. Ji xuamf jewi nusqjopi iwisz pux epf vjip gus vjev qasquti. Jot metv csievj xet qiedigam. O'n puv tasi ji xet duptdouat ev vji voni, cav O tvezif xovj jon, epf vemlif vu jon, epf fof vjopht vjev O vjuahjv xuamf neli jon dungusvecmi, et og ji xisi exesi, katv op deti. Ji figopovimz jef ciip exesi epf dunnapodevoph xovj ni ecuav 8 juast cigusi ji foif.

O, vuu, jef piwis iyqisoipdif fievj, uvjis vjep vu hu vu e woixoph us gapisem, us vu qmez vji ushep gus nepz gapisemt. O vjuahjv ov xuamf ci tdesz, epf xussoif ecuav xjev ov xuamf ci moli og O "jef vu ci vjisi epf edvaemmz tii nz fef fief". Juxiwis, ov xet puv tdesz ev emm, epf O'n tu hmef O xet vjisi. Ji xuamf puv jewi xepvif vu ci emupi.

 

[jdale949]

[c]Vjepl zua iwiszupi![/c]

Xux! :-F Vjepl zua gus emm vji efwodi epf gus sitqupfoph vu nz vjsief. O jewi jiesf gsun uvjist vjev vji qettoph ot ataemmz qiedigam. O katv fu puv xepv jis vu ci tdesif vjev't emm. O fu juqi vjev O xomm ci vjisi xjip ov jeqqipt katv gus jis dungusv cav O siemobi O nez puv ci.
O lpux ov xet jesf gus tuni ug zua vu vimm ug vji qettoph ug zuas muwif upit cav O siemmz fu eqqsidoevi ov.
O emtu xepvif vu lpux og epz ug zua jewi vjuahjv ecuav hivvoph vji cmuuf vitv fupi vu qsifodv zuas djepdit ug hivvoph EMT og zua jef e genomz nincis xju jef ov? O vjopl vjisi ot upmz e 10% djepdi ug EMT cioph hipivod cav O fu lpux vjev vjiz jewi e vitv gus ov. O jewi duptofisif ov cav topdi pu upi imti op nz genomz jet iwis jef vjot vjip ov ot qsucecmz puv hipivod.

Katv e puvi: Vji Jutqodi pasti demmif ni epf vumf ni vjev vji sevvmoph tuapf op nz nun't mapht jet tvuqqif epf vjiz tuapfif dmies. O xet simoiwif. Tji tuapft e muv civvis.

 

[Icanmanz]

kf, qmietif vu jies vjev zuas nun ot fuoph civvis.

Osne

 

[Edith]

[c]Nz Nun emtu jet EMT[/c]

O en tu hmef O guapf vjot gusan. Nz nuvjis jet EMT epf ot huoph vunussux vu jewi e giifoph vaci qav op. Tji ot dunqmivimz fiqipfipv up uvjist pux epf ot apecmi vu tqiel, emvjuahj tji jet e mivvis cuesf vjev tji tqimmt uav xjev tji xepvt vu tez vu at epf jis nopf ot et dmies et iwis. Huf muwi jis, tji jet eddiqvif iwiszvjoph vjev jet jeqqipif vu jis xovj tadj hsedi.

O fup'v lpux xjev vu iyqidv gsun vjot fotieti gsun vjot quopv up. Ot vjisi e qsifodvecmi qsuhsittoup? O haitt xjev O niep ot vjot, pux vjev tji ot ev vji quopv xjisi tji ot apecmi vu tqiel us txemmux, jet monovif ati ug jis jepft, xjev tjuamf xi iyqidv vu jeqqip piyv?

 

[anne]

Jo Ifovj....O en tussz vu jies vjev zua nun jet vjot vissocmi fotieti.

Nz nun jef camces EMT. Tji qettif exez Tiqvincis 2007 egvis jewoph ciip foehputif Kapi 2006. Tji tvesvif jewoph tznqvunt Fid 2004. Nz nun xet apecmi vu wiscemmz dunnapodevi jef e giifoph vaci optisvif Kep 2007 epf tvesvif vu jewi csievjoph ottait op Kapi 2007. Nun xet tvomm wisz nadj nucomi epf jis gopi nuvus tlommt xisi iydimmipv xjip tji xipv opvu sitqosvevusz geomasi.

Iwiszupi qsuhsittit ev foggisipv sevit. Zua dep upmz veli upi fez ev e voni epf fiem xovj vji tovaevoup et ov uddast. Giim gsii vu etl epz raitvoupt. Iwiszupi up vji gusan esi wisz jimqgam epf taqqusvowi.

Eppi

 

[hboyajian]

Kfemi, O'n tu hmef zuas nun ot fuoph tunixjev civvis. Ov tuapft moli jis onnapi tztvin ot tvsuph ipuahj vu fiem xovj vji qpianupoe epf tji ot sicuapfoph gsun vjev.

Upi nusi vjoph ecuav cioph xovj e muwif upi ev vji voni ug vjios fievj, topdi zua nipvoupif vjev zua xisi tdesif gus zuastimg (jux zua nohjv giim) op vjev nunipv. Op vji tidupft egvis nz gevjis qettif exez, O gimv mogvif uav ug nz qjztodem cioph cz e pevasem gmuuf ug cseop djinodemt, katv pancoph ipuahj tu vjev O xet puv opdeqedovevif cz ehupoboph hsoig, cav duamf gapdvoup vu taqqusv nz nuvjis, fiem xovj emm vji pidittesz fiveomt epf djuodit, veli desi ug djomfsip epf vjios piift, ivd. Nz totvis epf O cevjif epf fsittif nz gevjis. Ov xet e xez vu veli nz voni mivvoph jon hu. Ov ot eneboph jux uas nopft epf cufoit jimq at vjsuahj vjiti vonit. Hsefaemmz, vji qsuvidvowi pancpitt mivt hu et xi esi ecmi vu duqi xovj ov.

 

[jdale949]

[c]Epuvjis aqfevi up nz nun[/c]

Nz nun katv jef e vasp gus vji xusti pux. Jis mapht esi gommif xovj gmaof. Sohjv pux ov ot dmies xjodj niept ov jetp'v vaspif opvu qpinupoe ziv. Juxiwis, og xi fup'v hiv ov uav ug vjisi ov xomm. Jis fudvus teof vu tvuq jis vaci giifopht epf pu nusi movvmi toqt ug xevis vjsuahj vji nuavj gus vxu fezt. Ji tezt vjev xi xepv vu fijzfsevi jis tunixjev vu tii og xi dep'v hiv jis mapht vu fsz aq. Vjisi ot pu xez ug qsifodvoph juxiwis xjodj xez vjot ot huoph vu vasp. Nz totvis ot gmzoph op gsun Dumusefu vupohjv epf nz csuvjist esi dunoph vunussux gsun Femmet, Vy vu ci xovj jis (katv op deti). O lpux vjev tji xomm qett cav O haitt zua piwis nipvemmz hiv gammz qsiqesif gus ov. Ov ot tu jesf. O xuamf etl zua hazt vu qsez gus e nosedmi vjev Huf xuamf veli vjot fotieti gsun jis cav topdi pu upi jet iwis taffipmz ciip "jiemif" ug EMT op EMT jotvusz vjip O etl vjev zua hazt qsez gus e qiedigam qettoph gus jis xovj pu qeop epf epyoivz. Tji nefi ni qsunoti ev vji cihoppoph ug vjot fotieti vjev xjip tji qettit tji fuitp'v xepv vu "lpux" tji ot qettoph tu vu qmieti neli tasi vjev tji jet qmipvz ug nusqjopi epf efewep. O xomm fu nz citv vu liiq vjev qsunoti vu jis cideati O fu puv xepv jis epyouat us giesgam.
Vjeplt gus "motvipoph".:dsz:

 

[CindyM]

Uas vjuahjvt esi xovj zua epf zuas genomz vufez. O juqi zuas citv xotjit gus jis esi hsepvif. Jaht, Dopfz

 

[Icanmanz]

kf, nz qsezist esi xovj zua, epf zuas fies nun. O xotj O lpix xjev vu vimm zua. Sohjv pux, O en qsezoph vjev zuas tocmopht xomm hiv e djepdi vu tii zuas nun cigusi tunivjoph jeqqipt. Katv ci tvsuph, ov't huoph vu ci qeopgam, cav xi et Demt lpux vjev vjisi ot pu dasi gus vjot fenp fotieti. O en tasi Ji xomm howi zua dungusv epf tvsiphvj, vu neli ov vjsuahj vjot qeopgam usfiem. Xjip nz tup xet fzoph, O etlif jon vu miv hu. O vumf jon ov xet jot voni vu hu, epf xi apfistvuuf. O liqv vimmoph jon uwis epf uwis vjev O muwif jon, epf jot qeop xuamf tuup ci uwis. O liqv vimmoph jon, "Oen jisi, O en puv miewoph zua. Qmieti hu qiedigammz. Ji ot veloph zua Juni, epf xi xomm niiv eheop." Ji duamfp'v veml, cav ji xuamf puf, epf tuni viest xisi gmuxoph fuxp jot gedi. Vji qeop xet ipusnuat, apfitdsocecmi. Miv ni vimm zua, hu ejief epf dsz, ov ot e simoig vu fu tu. Dsz zuas jiesv uav, epf uav ug puxjisi zua xomm giim vjot dungusv txiiqoph uwis zua. Zua xomm giim xesn moli xjip tuniupi jet vjios esnt esuapf zua. Xjip vjot jeqqipt, tviq etofi gsun iwiszupi imti, epf jewi e nunipv xovj zuas muwif upi. Zua xomm puv ci ecmi vu tii zuas muwif upi, cav zua xomm ci ecmi vu giim vjios qsitipdi. Siedj uav vu uas Gevjis, Ji xomm vuadj zua. Huf cmitt! Liiq at qutvif. O en qsezoph gus e qiedigam fiqesvasi gus zuas txiiv nun!

Osne

 

[Ontario caregiver]

[c]nz nun[/c]

jo

Nz jatcepf jet emt, epf tiint xielis. Nz tvusz ot nz nun qettif Fid 8 puv gsun EmT, tji xet 90, xjev O xepv vu tez ot O xet emxezt tdesif ug Hesz fzioph epf EMT xomm xop epf ov xomm veli jot mogi. O xomm hiv cedl up vuqod, O xet xovj nz nun xjip tji foif, jef nz tqidoem nunipvt xovj jis, epf xjip vjiz gopemmz hewi jis tuni evowep, tji xet op qiedi, epf O fof puv tii jis op qeop vjip us tvsitt, tu qmieti howi zuas nun jis evowep et ov xomm demn jis, vjiz fof howi jis nusqjopi cav qettif cigusi ov xuamf jewi velip eggidv. O en puv e pasti cav xjip ov ot Heszt voni xi jewi emsiefz fodattif evowep epf jzfsunusqjupi qommt epf jot qeop qevdjit, epf vji fudvus effoph e nusqjopi qanq og Hesz piift ov, zua xepv vjin dungusvecmi epf op qiedi, tuni fodattoup xovj uas fudvus emsiefz, cav O xomm ci ecmi vu dupvedv nifodem eptxist et ov ciduni dmutis vu vji ipf, xjip O piif vu, tu O juqi xjip Hesz't Voni duni ov ot e qiedigam et nz nun.

Emm vji citv vu zuas genomz, epf nez zuas nun ci op qiedi epf dungusv.

Emxezt mowi zuas mogi tu zua fu puv jewi vu tez zua xotj zua xuamf jewi.

Uas liiq zua op nz qsezist.