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    • If you know someone that battled ALS, please add them here
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Rene

New member
Joined
Dec 29, 2007
Messages
2
Reason
Loved one DX
Country
US
State
MO
City
Poplar Bluff
After a 2 year battle with ALS, my dad, two days past his 58th birthday, finally suffered no more on March 8, 2008. My dad and I grew very close in the past two years. It is sad a disease had to bring a daughter closer to her father, but we both got to say things to each other that probably would never had been said. That I am thankful for. Because of the reality of the end result of the disease, I knew I had to take advantage of every day I had with him. I am soo glad that I came home every other weekend to see him. The four hour drive there and back always killed me Monday mornings, but I have no regrets, no hugs not given, no words that didn't get said. My brain knows he is in a much better place and I would not want him here suffering, but my heart doesn't, it is selfish. Along with the sadness, I am still very angry that this disease even developed in him. How do I let go of the life I pictured for him in what should have been his glory years? He should of been tinkering(sp) with cars, taking care of the yard he loved, and getting to relax and enjoy the rest of his life since he spent so much of his younger life working to support his family. I can't let it go that this should not of happened to him!
I used his forum a few times and have read many blogs. It really helped our family. Thank you for suggestions, honesty, and your stories.
 

Al

Moderator emeritus
Joined
May 25, 2004
Messages
7,960
Reason
PALS
Diagnosis
10/2003
Country
CA
State
On
City
NW of Toronto
Sorry to hear about your dad Rene. He sounds like he was a special part of your life.
AL.
 

hopealive

Active member
Joined
Sep 22, 2006
Messages
93
Reason
Lost a loved one
Country
US
State
OR
City
Albany
so very sorry

Rene,

My thoughts and prayers are with you. My mother has had ALS for 2 years now, she is 59. I feel exactly the same way that you do. It is very, very difficult for me to let go of the life I had imagined for her. She doesn't deserve this, no one does. I pray for comfort and peace for you and your family. Allow yourself time to grieve and process this, it is a lot to handle.
God Bless,
Hopealive
 

CindyM

Moderator emeritus
Joined
Sep 17, 2006
Messages
3,543
Reason
Learn about ALS
Country
US
State
New England
City
Anytown
I am sorry for your loss, Rene. You are right that nobody deserves this. Please check back in from time to time and let us know how things are for you. Cindy
 

MtPockets

Very helpful member
Joined
Jun 1, 2006
Messages
1,528
Reason
PALS
Diagnosis
05/2006
Country
US
State
Ms
City
Gulfport
Rene I'm sorry for your loss. You bring up a good point that I am always telling people. You had time with your Dad. There is very little if anything good about ALS, but at least we have time to get things in order, say the things we need to say, give the hugs, the love, etc. Many who die from a heart attack or car wreck never get the chance for closure like we do. I know it's not much, but I have to be thankful for the little things.

I pray for peace for you.
 

Paty

Distinguished member
Joined
Apr 1, 2006
Messages
194
Reason
PALS
Country
Mexico
State
Baja California
City
Mexicali
I am very sorry for your loss Rene

I know how you feel, I also lost my husband to A.L.S., after two and a half yrs. struggling with this horrible disease.

May God bless you and give you comfort; it is hard but I think that only time
will help us.

Paty
Baja California, Mexico
Cals to late husband Jorge
Dx 10/17/2005 Died. Dec. 30, 2007
 

1Mother

New member
Joined
Nov 26, 2007
Messages
3
Reason
Learn about ALS
Country
US
State
Il
City
Lake Forest
My condolences on the passing of your beloved father.
 

ScottishKiwi

New member
Joined
Jan 3, 2008
Messages
7
Reason
Loved one DX
Country
NZ
State
Northland
City
Kerikeri
Hi Rene,
First of all, I am so sorry for the loss of your father. My husband passed away just over a month ago after living with MND for just over 2 years, he was 61 and like your father, he was looking forward to his retirement and made lots of plans for renovating the house, designing the garden etc. etc. Although he was disappointed he wasn't able to follow thru' with his plans, he was full of gratitude that he had a life to look back on, to watch our 2 sons grow up to be fine young men and took great pleasure in seeing the next generation born. He felt fortunate that he'd reached the age he was, and felt so sad for the younger generation who were diagnosed with MND and hadn't the opportunity to experience everything he had during his life. So don't be angry that your father has missed out on his twilight years, but be happy he had the experience of having such a wonderful daughter who has grown up to be a caring, sensitive person. No doubt he had other experiences throughout his life he would not have missed for the world, and the people he met along the way. My heart goes out to you during this grieving time, but I hope you will, in time, remember your father with the love and joy you shared in his last few years, not many people get around to saying the things they should have said throughout their lives so be happy you and he had that opportunity.

Kind regards, Ang
 

Icanmanz

Senior member
Joined
Jul 14, 2007
Messages
947
Reason
PALS
Country
Uni
State
Texas
City
Tomball
God bless you Rene, and sorry for the late reply! I know the pain when you lose a loved one to this terrible disease, and I also know the peace you have in your heart at the end knowing that they are no longer suffering. May your loved one rest in peace. I long to see and feel my son too, but when you know in your heart that it was He who called him Home, you feel some peace! May God bless you!

Irma
 

JACKIEMAX

Distinguished member
Joined
Jan 22, 2007
Messages
159
Country
US
State
TN
City
Baxter
sorry for your loss

i am sorry for your loss. some als patients last many years esp. if it is just in the muscles and limbs. my husband has both - weak limbs pluecs diminished lumg capacity and is alive only bec=. he is on a special bipap that breathes for him. he can't walk, but can talk a little, can take the bi-pap off 3xa A DAY to eat, but must put it back on immed. i am sorry for your loss, but we all know als is a progressive, debilitating disease.

we all need each other, that's for sure. jackiemax
 

kra_zquilter

New member
Joined
Mar 27, 2008
Messages
8
Reason
Learn about ALS
Country
US
State
Maine
City
Lee
Sorry for your loss

There will be nothing but the passage of time that will help you cope with your loss. When you wrote about the things you were able to share with your father, it reminded me of when I lost my mother at the age of 58 to lung cancer. Out of her four children, I was blessed to be the one she felt she could be totally honest with in her final days. We laid in bed together, remembering happy times, discussing the scary road ahead, and I learned things about my mother I never knew. She was an immaculate housekeeper and one of the things she said to me was, "I should have played with you kids more and forgotten about that damn house!" I took that counsel to heart and played more with my children after that.

Unfortunately, I did not get the chance to have the same situation with my son. He died at age 30 in a house fire. We had been separated by space and time for a while prior to his death. I have often wondered what his last thoughts might have been. But it was a comfort for me to know my Mom was on the other side to greet him.

May you find peace knowing you were a comfort and a strength to your father when he needed you the most.

Elaine
 

Icanmanz

Senior member
Joined
Jul 14, 2007
Messages
947
Reason
PALS
Country
Uni
State
Texas
City
Tomball
kra, sorry for your losses. May your loved ones rest in peace. My prayers to you, and God bless!

Irma
 
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