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jdale949 Sorry for your loss

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Moderator emeritus
May 25, 2004
NW of Toronto
I am doubly sorry today. First for the loss of your loving mother and secondly because of my effort to combine your posts into this memorial forum I lost everything and can't get it back. For those that posted earlier if you could repost, that would help me to not feel so terrible. Your eulogy to your mother was lovely and if you could repost it here as a lasting memory of her it would make us both feel better. Once again I am sorry for causing you more trouble in this difficult time.
Mom passed on Jan 18th-Eulogy To My Mother

My mother, Carolyn Gail Payne Lee, was a remarkable woman. She was a beautiful woman and the one feature that I think most of us will remember is her smile. Her smile was radiant and just lit up her whole face.
Thankfully, ALS did not take her smile until the very end. She was a strong woman for she smiled all through this awful disease and I feel blessed for it. Yet, it was her inner beauty that radiated with such a glow that she left a mark on everyone she encountered. She was truly stunning.
My mother was my rock and my fortress. When I failed, she would remind me that it wasn’t the end of the world. And when I acted like a jerk, she wasn’t afraid to call me on it, love me through it, and forgive me for it. She often loved me in spite of myself. She was like that with all of her children. Then of course, there are her grandchildren and great-grandchildren. They were the center of her universe and while she loved them all the same, she had a unique relationship with each of them.
I will never forget the day I was diagnosed with cancer. The first place I went to when I left the doctor’s office was my mom’s house. I wanted my mom and I cried on her shoulder like a baby. Then, after my biopsy and my diagnosis were confirmed, she walked into my hospital room, took my hand, and cried. She kept saying, “I wish it was me, Oh God, how I wish it was me”. And I told her, “No mom, I need you.” That’s how she was. She loved her children unconditionally.
I will also never forget the day of her ALS diagnosis. She took it a lot better than I did. I was heartbroken. I kept professing my commitment to take care of her through this and how she wouldn’t be alone and again those thoughts came into my head, “I need you mom.” She put her hand on my arm and said, “It’s ok, I made my peace with God a long time ago.” I believe God gave her some of his own peace because that is the only way that I can explain her positive, beautiful attitude through a horrible disease like ALS.
Death is as much a miracle as birth. It replaces time with timelessness. It stretches the boundaries of space to infinity. It necessitates ways of knowing that are beyond the five senses. I was saddened by her diminishment in the latter years of her life, and I’ll miss her like crazy. But I marvel at all the things she and her life have taught me. I celebrate the way she has touched all of our lives here, and many more also. And I carry a piece of her always with me.
In a minute you will hear a song that speaks every feeling that I hold in my heart for my mother. I have asked my friend, Pam Hope, to sing it for me as a dedication to my mom.
Years ago my mom asked me to share this last piece of advice with you, her family and friends, at her funeral one day.

So she leaves you with this:

Remember me with smiles and laughter,
For that’s how I will remember you all.
If you can only remember me with tears,
Then don’t remember me at all.

We Love You Mom!
jdale, such a beautiful post. You and your mom were so lucky to have each other. Als is such a terrible disease, it turns your world inside out. I know exactly what you are going through now, and at the time of diagnosed as well. I felt the same way about my son. These Pals are so courageous! I remember when my son was given the diagnosed, I kept telling him, I wish it was me instead. He told me and everyone that he saw it as a plan that God had for him. All I can say is God bless these heroes, and the ones that have departed, may they rest in peace. Prayers your way, and may your dear Mom rest in peace.

Thank you Irma!

My heart just breaks at the knowledge that you lost your son to this horrible disease. :cry: It is bad enough losing a parent but I can't imagine losing a child. I have two myself. My daughter is 5 and my son is 10. You are such a strong person only made stronger through this terrible disease. I guess that is the one possitive thing to come from it. I feel stronger just extremely emotionally tired and sad. I am sure it is just part of the grieving process.
Blessings sent your way,
Your mom sounds like a wonderful person. My deepest sympathy to you and your family.
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