Confused and disappointed
New member
- Joined
- Mar 24, 2008
- Messages
- 9
- Reason
- Loved one DX
- Country
- US
- State
- California
- City
- San Dimas
My brother in law passed away March 26, 2008, from ALS with Dementia. He was only
57. We will miss him terribly. He was practically a part of my whole life. When he first met my oldest sister, I was 11 and I will soon turn 50. So for 39 years this man saw me grow up, graduate, and later get married. He was there when we adopted our son, and he was there for me throughout my life as a supportive loving, compassionate, and giving human being. He loved life, and he had a sense of humor that always put a smile on everyone's face. But most of all he loved my niece Marie with all of his heart, and loved her unconditionally. He and my sister divorced after 27 years of marriage, not what he wanted, but he learned to go on with his life. When the disease first made it's appearance he thought he had carpal tunnel in one of his hands and wrists. He was misdiagnosed and had surgery to correct it. Little did we all know. Then his behavior was starting to change as a result of the dementia and we just chalked it up to a "midlife crisis." How naive we all were. When he started having more problems with his hands and arms somehow it all did not seem like something that would go away. He was officially diagnosed in March of 2006 with ALS. Later he was diagnosed with ALS with dementia. We think he probably was having the symptoms of the disease for about 5 years prior to 2006. In 2006 he quit his beloved banking job, and his other job which was teaching real estate at Cal Poly Pomona, and went to stay up in northern Calfiornia with his brother and sister. He then came to live after a few months with my niece and her husband in Boerne, Texas. Last year my niece and her husband flew out with my brother in law to California, and we had a big family get together down at the beach. Jerry looked pretty good then. He hadn't lost complete use of his hands and arms, but he was limited. He could still walk and he was eating. He had maintained his weight with the love of his daughter with good meals and supplements of Ensure. That was a time we all will cherish as that was the last time a lot of us saw him. I went down additional days to spend time with him, and my niece. I am so glad I did. Later in the year he began to go down hill. By January he had lost a lot of his use of his hands. His challenges at the things we take for granted became a chore. By February he went into a nursing home, and was using his bi-pap machine full time. He also had a feeding tube as his swallowing mechanism was slowly leaving. By March he developed pneumonia and was moved to Hospice. By the 26th of March he took his last breath with a tear in his eye and left this world.
I am inspired by the man he was, for he was the kindest most gentlest soul I have ever known. He loved his daughter with his whole soul, and all of his good qualities are in her and she is his mirror image.
I hope with time we all can come to terms with all of this. Losing him at this time just brought up so many memories for all of us. We lost my Dad to lung cancer 5 years ago on April 14th, and my husband lost his brother who was only 48 at the time to a heart attack 4 years ago April 4th. Why God takes our loved ones when he does is a mystery. But I hope they are all together and having a party to celebrate that Jerry is no longer a prisioner in his own body.
We love you Jerry and forever you will be in our hearts!
57. We will miss him terribly. He was practically a part of my whole life. When he first met my oldest sister, I was 11 and I will soon turn 50. So for 39 years this man saw me grow up, graduate, and later get married. He was there when we adopted our son, and he was there for me throughout my life as a supportive loving, compassionate, and giving human being. He loved life, and he had a sense of humor that always put a smile on everyone's face. But most of all he loved my niece Marie with all of his heart, and loved her unconditionally. He and my sister divorced after 27 years of marriage, not what he wanted, but he learned to go on with his life. When the disease first made it's appearance he thought he had carpal tunnel in one of his hands and wrists. He was misdiagnosed and had surgery to correct it. Little did we all know. Then his behavior was starting to change as a result of the dementia and we just chalked it up to a "midlife crisis." How naive we all were. When he started having more problems with his hands and arms somehow it all did not seem like something that would go away. He was officially diagnosed in March of 2006 with ALS. Later he was diagnosed with ALS with dementia. We think he probably was having the symptoms of the disease for about 5 years prior to 2006. In 2006 he quit his beloved banking job, and his other job which was teaching real estate at Cal Poly Pomona, and went to stay up in northern Calfiornia with his brother and sister. He then came to live after a few months with my niece and her husband in Boerne, Texas. Last year my niece and her husband flew out with my brother in law to California, and we had a big family get together down at the beach. Jerry looked pretty good then. He hadn't lost complete use of his hands and arms, but he was limited. He could still walk and he was eating. He had maintained his weight with the love of his daughter with good meals and supplements of Ensure. That was a time we all will cherish as that was the last time a lot of us saw him. I went down additional days to spend time with him, and my niece. I am so glad I did. Later in the year he began to go down hill. By January he had lost a lot of his use of his hands. His challenges at the things we take for granted became a chore. By February he went into a nursing home, and was using his bi-pap machine full time. He also had a feeding tube as his swallowing mechanism was slowly leaving. By March he developed pneumonia and was moved to Hospice. By the 26th of March he took his last breath with a tear in his eye and left this world.
I am inspired by the man he was, for he was the kindest most gentlest soul I have ever known. He loved his daughter with his whole soul, and all of his good qualities are in her and she is his mirror image.
I hope with time we all can come to terms with all of this. Losing him at this time just brought up so many memories for all of us. We lost my Dad to lung cancer 5 years ago on April 14th, and my husband lost his brother who was only 48 at the time to a heart attack 4 years ago April 4th. Why God takes our loved ones when he does is a mystery. But I hope they are all together and having a party to celebrate that Jerry is no longer a prisioner in his own body.
We love you Jerry and forever you will be in our hearts!
