Bebe
New member
- Joined
- Jan 9, 2016
- Messages
- 1
- Reason
- CALS
- Diagnosis
- 03/2010
- Country
- US
- State
- Missouri
- City
- Brentwood
Hello. I hope I dont sound selfish. I really dont know what to do. My husband was diagnosed with als in 2013. He is at the later stages now but he is unrealistic. I was in the process of filing for divorce shortly before he was diagnosed [because he wsd si mean and wanted to isolate me from my friends and family. Upon diag nosis i decided to stay and care for him.
My daily routine consist of getting up on the morning to change and shower him. I dress him and make breakfast for him. I get myself dressed then drive over an hour to het to work. I paid a caregiver out of pocked becausr he didnt like the caregivers sent by pallative care.
When u come home. He wants me to ask him if i could do my chores. He says he doesn't want me to leave him in the room long.
When i want to get out with my friends or family...he says that i dont care. I feel guilty so i stay home.
He was given hospice but he only wants me to use the service for pain. Even though i tell him that im tired and need rest, he complains.
I recently began to talk extensively about his condition with a collegue and he is so understanding and patient.
He often gives me encouragement and keep me with perspective. I feel like my husband is becoming more spiteful and mean as time goes on. The gentleman asked me out to dinner and i really dont know what to say.
I do want a life after my husband is gone and i am intrigued by this collegue.
I wonder if i should get her a caregiver and go. Or decline the offer until my duties are done.
I care for my husband and i want him to have quality. After20 years of marriage..i owe him that.
I feel confused. I feel like i am dieing necause i have no outsite life.
Am I wrong for both wanting to live life. Am I selfish?
My daily routine consist of getting up on the morning to change and shower him. I dress him and make breakfast for him. I get myself dressed then drive over an hour to het to work. I paid a caregiver out of pocked becausr he didnt like the caregivers sent by pallative care.
When u come home. He wants me to ask him if i could do my chores. He says he doesn't want me to leave him in the room long.
When i want to get out with my friends or family...he says that i dont care. I feel guilty so i stay home.
He was given hospice but he only wants me to use the service for pain. Even though i tell him that im tired and need rest, he complains.
I recently began to talk extensively about his condition with a collegue and he is so understanding and patient.
He often gives me encouragement and keep me with perspective. I feel like my husband is becoming more spiteful and mean as time goes on. The gentleman asked me out to dinner and i really dont know what to say.
I do want a life after my husband is gone and i am intrigued by this collegue.
I wonder if i should get her a caregiver and go. Or decline the offer until my duties are done.
I care for my husband and i want him to have quality. After20 years of marriage..i owe him that.
I feel confused. I feel like i am dieing necause i have no outsite life.
Am I wrong for both wanting to live life. Am I selfish?
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