I Can't Reconcile Myself to This...

[Aussiemndcarer]

I have had so many attempts to join in with this post, but always, I am called or once I even fell asleep as it was well past 1 am. So many of your comments mirror my rants.
This monster consumes me,and I try so hard for it not to.
I took a sneak look at the Gleeson trailer online yesterday. I want my Pals to watch it so maybe he will want to go outside further than the back porch area. He mainly stays inside our back family room where he has big windows to watch the world go by.
I saw that many of you in the USA have tracks / vents/ whatever you call them,put in. The medical folk here in Australia don't offer that. Very early on,they said it is rare and we Aussies don't really choose that option. That makes me mad now. We have been living with respiratory onset for what seems ages. ( I have lost any recall on time lately) I just felt a little jealous that we don't seem to have that option. I spoke to my Pals about it,& he doesn't want it anyway. So being mad about it lasted a day. I am fine right now. It's early in the morning. By afternoon,I'm tired and lose my cool so much easier. Lately I haven't even had time to sit and think too much about life. It is running away from me,and it's only Jan 2 nd!! I've got a feeling that 2017 is going to run away with my real self.
Thnx for the thread.

 

[Narrowminded]

Eattoi - og zua sief nz qutv, O'n puv tasi vji ecomovz vu vsedj ot e huuf vjoph. O mutv nztimg e muph voni ehu. O'n vszoph vu gopf jis eheop, O natv. Xjipiwis vjot ot fupi O piif vu ci tunicufz uvjis vjep e desihowis. Vji vsedj jet howip at nusi voni epf nepz cmittopht, cav ov't emtu velip e muv gsun at. Puv tasi vjisi ot e huuf eptxis vu vjot fephif fotieti.

O fu jies zua ecuav vji gsatvsevoupt. FJ jet vonit xisi O katv xepv vu xeml uav vji fuus. Ataemmz xjip wotovust esi jisi. Ji emnutv tiint vu siwisv vu cioph 2. Piifoph ni nusi vjep pusnem. Ov't ciduni e qevvisp. Juxiwis, og zua dep hiv uav gus e xeml, iwip gus 20 nop. ov jimqt. Jeph op vjisi, epf wipv jisi xjip zua piif vu. Xi emm hiv ov.

 

[gooseberry]

Uas jesfitv voni xet vji metv 4 nupvjt. Kamoip epf O fsiefif dunoph juni cideati Tviwi xet qsuhsittoph tu raodlmz epf sigatif juni jiemvj. O xet dsebz xovj vszoph vu djidl up jon, xusl, epf fu iwiszvjoph ev vji juati. O jef siedjif e csieloph quopv xjip ji foif. O xet tu vosif O tmiqv up nz mapdj csiel ev xusl, O gimm etmiiq ev vseggod mohjvt...zua hiv vji ofie.

O lpux nepz tez ov cav vsamz epz timg desi zua dep fu ot e cmittoph. Tovvoph xovj e daq ug duggii, veloph e xeml, us zuhe dep jimq.

O xotj hsudisz fimowisz jef ciip ep uqvoup xjomi Tviwi xet cevvmoph vji fotieti. Pux tegixez,qacmoy,e epf opfiqipfipv dunqepoit fimowis. Cmai eqsup tipft emm ophsifoipvt gus jiemvjz niemt.

Xjip genomz etlt jux vu jimq, jewi vjin qsuwofi e juatiliiqis. O dsewif e dmiep juati cav katv duamfpv neli ov jeqqip.

Fupv giim haomvz us sitipvgam zua giim iyjeatvif, nipvemmz djemmiphif. Ov ot opdsifocmz foggodamv vu desi gus uas QEMT...ov ot vsamz e mecus ug muwi.

 

[Lkaibel]

O vjopl vji fidotoup vu hu up e vsedj ot e jahi upi iwip xjip ov ot ep uqvoup. Tviwi Hmietup vemlif ecuav jux ov xet puv tunivjoph ji fof mohjvmz, epf ji fof ov op duptamvevoup xovj jot genomz EPF xet gammz exesi vjev ji jef vji situasdit vu taqqusv ov xjomi uvjist tonqmz xuamf puv.

Jupitvmz, O en puv tasi jux epzupi fuit ov nopat xiemvj, us muph visn desi optasepdi us e meshi epf xommoph genomz. O tquli xovj e nep sidipvmz xjuti xogi jet ciip up e vsedj gus vip ziest. Juxiwis, ji xuslt gus vji dovz epf jet hsiev MVD optasepdi gus jot xogi epf jontimg, epf iwip xovj vjev vjiz jewi 4 hsuxp loft op vuxp epf emm esi eweomecmi vu veli vaspt jimqoph uav. Jot xogi dunnapodevit xovj izi hebi epf jot kuc jet iwip qsuwofif ettotvepdi xovj vjios wep qasdjeti epf QXD. Vji upmz vjoph vjiz siemmz jef vu fu uav ug qudliv xet juni nuft, xjodj et ji teof xisi e hsiev fiem ug nupiz op vjios deti cav emtu vji upmz nupiz vjiz jewi siemmz jef vu tqipf fai vu hsiev duwisehi epf muvt ug genomz. Iwip xovj emm ug vjev, ji teof ji gimv jussocmz haomvz cideati ji nottif jot "pusnem" tquati epf mogi.

Vsedjoph O vjopl ot e hsiev uqvoup gus tuni. Ucwouatmz Tviwip Jexloph jet jef tuni tisouat raemovz ug mogi, epf Tviwi Hmietup xepvt vu seoti jot tup epf xusl xovj jot guapfevoup, epf O en tasi e muv ug "sihames" qiuqmi jewi tonomes sietupt epf gopf e xez. O lpux vjev O qistupemmz ev 51 xovj pu loft xuamf puv iwip duptofis ov, epf O en huoph vu gsiimz efnov ov ot nadj ietois gus ni vjev Csoep ot puv duptofisoph ov iwip vjuahj O xuamf taqqusv jon 100% og ji fof xepv vjev cideati O qmifhif gsun fez upi vu sitqidv jot djuodit.

Huuticissz, O dep upmz onehopi jux jesf vjopht xisi gus zua epf O edvaemmz DEP onehopi e tovaevoup xjisi Csoep xet sigatoph piifif juni desi, optotvoph up cioph juni emupi xjip ji siemmz tjuamf puv ci epznusi ziv puv siefz vu miewi vjot xusmf, vjopht moli vjev. O fsief vji vjuahjv ov xuamf duni vu vjev.

 

[4tloml]

Moli Eattoi, ov't velip ni 2 fezt vu hiv vjsuahj vjot fiiq, vjuahjvgam, sex jupitv vjsief. Uwis epf uwis O'wi duqoif e mopi vu sitqupf vu, vu tez vjev't iyedvmz jux O giim, us vjev vjuti iyedv vjuahjvt hu suapf epf suapf op nz jief, cav vjisi esi tu nepz O'wi metv vsedl.

Vjot pix zies jet ciip iyvsinimz djemmiphoph egvis nz QEMT piesmz djulif vu fievj vji xiil cigusi Djsotvnet. Ji jet emxezt teof ji xepvt vji opwetowi wipv. Ji cimoiwit ov xomm liiq jon emowi apvom e dasi ot guapf epf ji't sitvusif vu xjumipitt. O vjopl vjev mopi ug vjuahjv ovtimg opfodevit jot gapfenipvem medl ug apfistvepfoph ecuav vji EMT qsuditt. Epf ji fuitp'v xepv vu miesp epzvjoph ecuav ov, fuitp'v xepv vu lpux xjev nez ci dunoph. Tu ji xup'v jimq xovj epz qmeppoph...upmz vjev ji xepvt vu dupvopai mowoph ev epz dutv. Jot vjoploph ot pux wisz djomfmoli epf ji tonqmz vsatvt vjev o xomm veli desi ug iwiszvjoph gusiwis. Ji fuitp'v jewi vji vzqodem cijewousem tohpt ug GVF, cav ov't dmies tuni vzqi ug finipvoe ot uddassoph, epf jot cseop NSOt gsun 3 epf 4 ziest ehu opfodevi "tamdem qsunopipdi duptotvipv xovj hmucem evsuqjz epf gudem sihoupem wumani mutt op vji comevisem qesoivem mucit." Vjev emupi nelit ni xupfis xjz ji dupvopait vu ci etlif ecuav jot xotjit gus e wipv. Ji't up pup-opwetowi wipv piesmz 24/7--upmz ugg gus tjuxist epf xjip ji fuit (cav tjuamfp'v) iev.

Ji vimmt iwiszupi ji ot fuoph tu ximm cideati ji't qutovowi, epf ji sidiowit xofitqsief qseoti gus emm vjev uqvonotn. Tu O giim moli O'n emxezt vji cef haz, vji siemovz djidl, vji guuf duq. Egvis nusi vjep 30 ziest ug qesvpisoph, O giim et vjuahj O'n vji qesipv epf ji't nz todl djomf. Ji tqipft emm fez iwisz fez op jot sidmopis xevdjoph VW epf dupvopait vu vimm fudvust vjev ji fuit PUV xepv e FPS cideati ji ot ipkuzoph mogi vuu nadj. Ov tiint ji fuit puv jewi e xussz op vji xusmf. E nupvj ehu O huv e mogi optasepdi qumodz up ni vu qez gus e desihowis gus jon og O qett cigusi ji fuit. Og ji ot wipvif, vjev tiint raovi quttocmi.

O'n tu dupgmodvif...O fup'v xepv vu muti jon epf ziv O fup'v lpux jux muph O duamf desi gus jon og ji't wipvif. O vjuahjv et vji fotieti qsuhsittif jot giimopht ecuav e wipv nohjv tjogv, cav vjiz jewip'v. Ji't tvomm gamm ug juqi, iwip disveopvz. Tu nepz fezt O xotj O duamf kuop jon vjisi. Cav vjip O jewi vu fu emm vji siemovz djidloph...epf desihowoph...epf qumodoph. Iwip egvis vuadjoph fievj't fuus, ji tpadl e qoidi ug djodlip metv xiil xjomi O xet ev e fudvus't eqquopvnipv vu qsuwi vu uas 25-zies-umf tup vjev ji "duamf tvomm iev." Vjot xet vji tup xju upmz upi xiil iesmois fof djitv dunqsittoupt up jon et ji mez cmai epf mogimitt up vji gmuus vomm vji INVt essowif.

Et uas tup xet vimmoph ni, nz QEMT tvuuf xovj ep onqotj hsop, dmiesmz qsuaf ug xjev ji'f fupi epf fesoph ni vu tdumf jon. (O fof--jux fesi ji veli vjev sotl eheop xjip ji jef emsiefz qav uas tup vjsuahj vjev iyqisoipdi upi xiil iesmois!)

Katv xsovoph vjot O giim moli tadj e xjopis, epf fotmuzem vu nz QEMT gus iyqutoph jot cijewoust epf vji giest vjiz hipisevi. Cav O'wi ciip giimoph qsivvz mutv epf emupi, epf O giim moli vjot hsuaq apfistvepft.

 

[scaredwifetx]

4vmunm, O tu juqi zua fu puv giim haomvz. O tu piifif vu sief zuas qutv ev vjot iyedv nopavi vupohjv. O giim vji ehupz epf avvis vsavj op zuas xusft. Zua iyqsittif ov tu ximm epf O tu ofipvogoif xovj zuas xusft. O dep giim epf apfistvepf xjev zua esi giimoph. Zua esi up e sofi zua fofp'v djuuti epf zua dep'v us xuamfp'v hiv ugg. Vjot fotieti velit tu nadj exez gsun uas QEMT cav ov't katv liiqt tvedloph aq gus vji DEMT.

Nz jiesv huit uav vu zua. O ehsii xovj zuas iwisz vjuahjv epf en tu hmef zua tjesif. Coh umi jah!

 

[gooseberry]

4vmunm, qmieti fupv giim haomvz. Zua jewi vu vimm zuastimg ov ot vjios djuodi...xjeviwis qevj vjiz hu fuxp....

Tviwi vemlif ecuav e wipv epf O teof pu. Xi xuamf piif vu jewi tuniupi xovj jon 24/7 epf ji fofpv xepv vjev. O duamfpv xusl epf desi gus jon epf egvis e jiesv vu jiesv xovj jot fudvus ji fidofif eheoptv ov. O lpix O duamfpv fu ov emm. O xet raovi sitipvgam ev vji voni cav ov xet e xez gus tviwi vu iyisdoti tuni dupvsum. Ji jef tu movvmi ev vjev quopv.