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smokey

New member
Joined
Oct 30, 2007
Messages
4
Reason
CALS
Country
au
State
buckland
City
buckland
Hi my husband is waiting to be tested for MND. This has been really hard as he has had symptoms for nearly a year and not told me. he finally told me he had an appointment with a neurologist and was not having an affair. he had been so distant and pushed me away wouldnt tell me what was wrong until finally I asked him if he wanted me to leave thats when he told me. He still wont tell me the date of his test says he wants to deal with it first then will tell me when he is ready.This is so hard as I want to be there for him.He keeps saying even if the test is positive doesnt mean he has it. He symptoms have got worse. What started as just cramp in his calves have now gone to twitching in thighs , back and arms. He has some weakness in his grip but that comes and goes. He has lost 12kg over the year, but also not exercising as has a broken pelvis at the moment from Mountaining biking he is very active so quite depressed about everything.
What can I do to help him and get him to open up I am scared he will try to handle it himself. He said he didnt want to tell me as he doesnt want me to worry. We have been together for 20yrs he is only 43.I feel guilty when I get angry with him for being a pain knowing what he is going through. I told him no matter what we will deal with it together.That we just have to take one day at a time.He seems to be happier with people that dont know thats hard to take but I understand why. What can I do ?
 

brooksea

Legendary member
Joined
Sep 27, 2006
Messages
5,171
Reason
Other
Country
HM
smokey,

Very sorry to hear that your husband may have MND/ALS. My husband also hid his symptoms from me. But I was the one that had to force him to go to the doctor. Men are so stubborn sometimes. (no offense guys)

It sounds like you have already done the best you can by telling him you will be there for him no matter what. Please let us know the outcome of his doctor's appointment.

Post under the caregivers forum. there are plenty of us here to provide support.

do y'all have any children. My husband is 48 and we have one son.

Good luck and hang in there!
 

pmbenb83

Distinguished member
Joined
Aug 6, 2007
Messages
399
Diagnosis
03/2008
Country
US
State
VA
City
Stafford
Hi Smokey,

I am also sorry to hear that you and your husband are going through this. My husband is 45 and did his best to stay in denial about his symptoms. I also had to urge him to go to the doctor and I made the neurology appointment for him.

My husband is also very stubborn, but at some point they come to terms with everything and realize how important it is to go through this together. There are many previous posts that give great web sites about MND along with many caring people who go above and beyond to help us new people. I cannot thank them enough. :)

Take care of yourself and let us know how you and your husband are doing.
Pam B in Va
 
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