Hubby Isn't Feeling Good

[TGB1]

I feel exactly the same way Barbie. I hate what this disease has done to my mother, and I hate and resent what it is taking away from me and my family. And yet we carry on, as we must. Thinking of you.

Trina

 

[cheerleader]

Barbie, ALWAYS appreciate your honesty. Life is not easy for PALS or CALS!

 

[Atsugi]

I know exactly what you mean, Barbie, and I worry for you. Frankly, the hospital is a scary place for a very good reason, and I don't mean germs. There are too many "semi-skilled" workers who don't understand paralysis, but will never admit it. I think you were very brave just to take ten minutes out for dinner. I think I would have called out for a pizza delivery. I'm glad you're home.

 

[gooseberry]

Barbie, I am so sorry it was for so long and so miserable. After our brief stints in the hospitals recently I understand a little. Even good nurses provide mediocre care and our pals do get so scared. We have to see a cardiologist to manage my husbands heart symptoms. The cardiologist told us, before the neuro that his problems were all neuromuscular..

 

[nebrhahe53]

So sorry Barbie.All you can do is the best you can do, and you are.
Last night my wife and daughter were gone for 4-5 hrs shopping and driving around. I started to panic because they weren't there but I managed not to bother them-was close though. Its hard, but you need some time for yourself too!

 

[JimInVA]

Thinking about you, Barbie... and hoping you both got some sleep last night...

Jim

 

[rosec]

Barbie, I am so glad the whole hospital ordeal is over for the two of you. I understand about the needy part; it's the same with my DH. He understands that I need to be away for work, errands, etc. but otherwise he wants me around all the time. These days he will not allow anyone else to put him to bed, not even the children, because he feels I am the only one who knows exactly how to adjust his bipap, his arms, legs and head to make him comfortable in bed.
I hope your DH will start using the bipap regularly when he gets it. Thinking of you guys.....

 

[Janie H]

Barbie is there anyone else who he trusts to stay with him while you get some rest? Will benefit both of you.

Janie

 

[Diane H]

A PALS that is so demanding as to keep caregivers from leaving even with someone else there probably isn't being difficult intentionally. The cause is likely to be severe anxiety, even panic attacks. Some antidepressants have good anti-anxiety effects and may work wonders. In the very early stages of having breathing problems, I was fighting all out panic attacks whenever my husband was out of range for hearing me. I am sure I got to be a real pain in the a$$! Within two weeks of starting on Zoloft I was much more relaxed -- and able to problem solve. Coming up with a reliable way to call for help was what completed the process of returning me to being reasonable! A PALS who refuses to even try antidepressants is being totally unreasonable!

 

[Barbie]

Hi All

Last nite, after we got home 3 of our kids showed up to "help" . they mean well, but...my oldest daughter brought some food (yeah!) and I got husband fed and toileted and bathed and relaxed on the computer. I took a long shower and then my dear daughter tried to help my husband to bed. he was unreasonable in his desire to only have me. she helped him anyway despite his complaints, and then I went upstairs to sleep and she stayed with him. I slept 12 hours without a break. it was wonderful. I could really use another couple of days of it. thank you god for my oldest daughter and her understanding of the situation.

Diane, mu husband has been on citalopram for several years. It has worked very well. we were attempting to switch to an anti-depressant that has an appetite increase as a side affect when all this started. right now he does not want to go back on the citalopram but the other anti depressant is out of the question. I think he needs the citalopram--he has been very emotional and needy with out it (yes, we tapered but obviously still withdrawling) I am going to suggest to him that he needs it again. I hope he will agree.

 

[affected]

So glad you are home!

Hospital with a PALS is a nightmare, don't I know it.

I hope you can keep things at a level now where you can stay home, and get that anti depressant back happening! More wine love, it's the weekend, unwind as you can!

Are your kids gone or some at least staying the rest of the weekend?

 

[SMP51]

oh Barbie, I have been MIA for just a little while and missed this! So glad you are home and BIG brownie points to your daughter!

 

[Janie H]

So glad you are home and got some rest, my oldest son is my CALS and he does a very good job, I thank God every day for him. Ken may be on so many meds that he doesn't realise what he is doing to you. I was hospitalized for a month in 2007, on many pain meds, I honestly thought that I couldn't be left alone, it was a botched surgery that got infected and I really thought that the nurses were going to kill me to keep me from suing ( never did), sometimes the meds can make a person more needy than usual.

 

[DreamsEnd]

All I can say Barbie, is that you are amazing and I'm so glad this forum is here for you/us! I am so sorry for you both. So glad you got that long sleep! Wish I was closer so I could bring food and perhaps my PALs and I could give you a break.

Thank you for sharing this, you are helping me to prepare and understand.

Wear your suit proudly, strong lady!

Sherry

 

[zoohouse]

Barbie, I am so sorry that things have been so difficult. Tim's 2 oldest brothers came as well as one sister-in-law on friday, but they originally were supposed to be here thursday. I have been going non-stop for the last 5 days, although his brothers did change the tires on his pwc, and other things that needed to be done. I did get one 45 min. nap while they took him for a walk, and I woke up feeling the most rested I have in a year. I am hoping that your husbands elevated heart rate was related to the anxiety of being in the hospital, and will begin to settle back to that magic 90. I am glad your daughter didn't bend to her father, as that is exactly what needed to happen.
My husband is really great, but he too has become very reluctant to let anyone do anything for him but me. I have hinted that I would like to sleep in the spare room, and bring his alarm ringer with me so that if he called I would be sure to hear it, but he almost became weepy. I can understand, and it really isn't that bad being in the room. Lately he has been dreaming a lot and ringing the bell because of something in his dream. He always is so apologetic but one night it happened 4 times. The silly thing is that I hear the slightest sound that he makes so don't really need the alarm, except when I am in the office on the computer. It is what it is.

Paulette