How can I help?

[[email protected]]

:?:My brother was diagnosed in October 2006 and is now wheelchair bound and has no use of his feet and legs. His arms and hands are very weak and breathing is becomming harder. He finds it difficult at best to hold his head and his speach is somewhat impeded. His wife and kids are great and do whatever it takes to keep my brother comfortable. I want to help out in some way to make their life easier and am looking for some ideas. Please Help!Thanks

 

[Lorie]

Spend time with your Brother

Spend time with your Brother. Give his wife a break from time to time. It would benefit you all! Offer to run errands for them. Ask if there is anything they need? Take the kids out. Alot of the time people don't bother to offer help. You learn who your true family and friends are. You obviously care. That is great!


Lorie

 

[BarkingDog]

My wife was diagnosed in Jan 07 and is at about the same stage as your brother.
Some family and friends have been spectacularly helpful to us. The greatest of all have not offered help or asked what they could do, they just did it. They would turn up with food, they would come over unannouced and start cleaning, get their kids to ring our kids to ask if they want to come to the movies or a sleep-over etc.
They don't ask for thanks, they don't make you ask, they don't talk about what they'll do, they do it!
They are angels.

 

[brooksea]

BarkingDog,

You are so very lucky to have such giving friends!

Welcome to the forum, sorry you have to be here! You will find support and information on this site and I'm sure you will be able to help us as you journey through ALS with your wife.

 

[BarkingDog]

On reflection, I thought my post was a little cold.
I guess what I was trying to get across was, don't do things out of guilt. Everyone's at a different point in their life. Some can do a little, some can do a lot. Do what you can because you want to. Go over and make your brother a cup of coffee.
The greatest gift has been not having to ask.

 

[[email protected]]

Thanks a bunch

Hey Barking Dog- I tried the just do it thing,and by golly it worked. Thanks a bunch.

 

[BarkingDog]

Fantastic.
I truly believe you have made both you and your brothers life better.

 

[ilovemymom]

I really love this thread

My mother was diagnosed with Bulbar ALS in October 2006. When my parents' neighbors were told of the diagnosis they dropped a note in my parents' mailbox offering sincere sympathy and support - very kind of them, indeed.

Now that she depends on a feeding tube and wheelchair and her speech is unintelligible to those outside of the family the neighbors have been calling me to ask how they can help. I suggested that they drop easy, homemade meals off for my Dad since he relies on not-so-healthy take out, if he eats dinner at all. They jumped right into action - dropping off chicken and rice dishes, pasta and pre-chopped salads that my dad can just throw in a bowl and add the dressing provided. I know my mom appreciates that my Dad is eating meals with fresh ingredients now that he does not have the delicious and health-conscious meals she always prepared.

Tagging on to the previous comment about offering help without being prompted - so true and so appreciated. A simple and excellent example: I was grabbing the newspaper from the front porch and saw that a neighbor was pulling my parents' trashcans up the driveway after the garbage had been collected. We made eye contact, I smiled and said thanks, he waved and said "no problem." I mentioned it to my Dad and he said the neighbor does it every week without fail. I was so moved by this simple act of community.