Vincent

Senior member
Joined
Dec 30, 2013
Messages
895
Reason
PALS
Diagnosis
08/2014
Country
CA
State
ON
As someone who went through my father's cancer journey, I learned not to ask how are you? Crappy, dying, in pain the list went on.I asked instead how today was? Overall things were falling apart, but some days were better than others.
Vincent
 

ReginaS

Forum Supporter
Active member
Joined
Nov 20, 2018
Messages
92
Reason
CALS
Diagnosis
02/2018
Country
US
State
--
I sometimes say "I don't know any more how to answer this question."
You know what else I don't like? When they ask the same question about my pALS.

Though...many people are genuinely concerned. And I often don't know what the 'right' thing to say is either.

I also get to see the best side of people, like this past weekend when the waterline broke. We got so much help, friends (plumber and electrician) dropped what they were doing and came over to help and even the repair people opened up about their ailments.
 

Ken15

Member
Joined
Jan 9, 2018
Messages
21
Reason
CALS
Diagnosis
09/2017
Country
US
State
South Carolina
To friends and neighbors I see on a fairly regular basis, I will go into more detail, like: "today was a good/bad day or we're looking forward to participating in an upcoming clinical trial or multi-disciplinary clinic, etc."

To friends and acquaintances I see considerably less often (i.e., run into at the market or elsewhere) my standard response is "we're taking it a day at a time, thanks for asking." If the conversation leads to a more detailed discussion, or not, so be it.

In each case I believe the concern is genuine. People care, on a certain level, else they would not ask. My response is tempered by the situation as described above.

Ken
 
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