Wildemom, i know that feeling, so many thoughts started going through my mind, and I found I could not stop thinking about those things... And one day, I started to pray, and as I let everything out, I cried I screamed and was really just lost, it finally came over me..... "You can only control what your in control of". And literally from that point on, I can't force myself to think of some of the thing I was worried about. Don't get me wrong, at first you do have to be realistic and get things in order, and talk about stuff you normally wouldn't, I think that is very important. But if your anything like me.... I tend to obsess over things, and that is not a good thing.
For me, I can't control ALS or the progression,or the end result, I can control him being comfortable, him having knowledge of what's happening, us having a safe living space, things like that. So that is what I focus on. And to tell you the truth, when God helped me realize that he also lead me to this forum, and what a turn around our household made. Just for the fact, that I finally had people that understood, and they actually listen and help, in turn I realized what an effect my attitude had on my pALS and the daily process of things. If I stay positive, he seems to follow suite, if I'm cranky, he's twice as cranky.... And that's miserable... If I try something out that I learned from someone hear, he thinks I'm wonderful, and that's awesome! Lol sorry everyone, I do take the credit for stuff! Hehehe.
Ok I started rambling, but I guess the point is, this damn disease seems to take us CALS on a roller coaster of emotions, just know that with each step of the way you have a whole forum of CALS here for you! We give good cinder hugs!
Prayers for all!