Dad in hospital infection? Breathing a problem

[affected]

Thanks for updating Penelope, it is hard to watch and I'm glad you are feeling supported.

It is normal to keep slowly upping the meds, as keeping him comfortable now is total focus. I hope it was a problem with the vpap and he is more comfortable when you go in this morning.

Remember to just keep sending the love to him, that will be a huge comfort to him no matter what.

 

[Penelope]

Thanks all. Crappy day again (days should be measured in degrees of crappiness at the moment lol)

He has had a catheter put in as he was retaining too much urine. Hopefully that will be more comfortable.

Today he typed on his ipad (which is a big effort for him) that if he can't get out of hospital he wants it over with as soon as possible. My Mother dissolved into tears I managed to hold it together. I can totally understand why he would feel that way but it is still so difficult to digest.

We have laminated some signs for him to hold up for the nurses to help him avoid using the ipad.

I have told the nurses what he typed I am trying to advocate for him but feel helpless. Will keep being there holding his hand cracking my lame jokes and making sure what he wants is heard.

 

[affected]

I would think that as his daughter advocating for him must be incredibly difficult. You will always treasure knowing that you gave him this at this time.

Catheter now is a great idea. I know that Chris had a full bladder at one point at the end stage and became really restless and it took a smart nurse on a phone to think of it.

Wish I could hug you, but I can tell you that you are doing an amazing job supporting your dad this way and I'm sure you are supporting your mum a lot too. I hope you have someone who can give you some support (besides us, that is).

Hold your head high, have a great big cry in the shower or whenever you need tonight. Deep breath, and know we are behind you.

 

[AKjo]

I had the privilege of being with my brother who at age 59 died from pancreatic cancer. I told him that I would make sure that his wife of 39 years was ok and I would help her get through it. Although unresponsive at the time, it seemed to relax him to hear that. I also sang hymns and old songs and talked about times when we were kids. I think he heard me! Let your dad know you will be there for your mom...

 

[MaxEidswick]

>Will keep being there holding his hand cracking my lame jokes and making sure what he wants is heard.

hang in there, you are doing what is needed!

 

[skipper66]

Sending you our love and support. You are doing all the right things. I wish I could be there in person as well to give you a hug.

 

[Janie H]

Prayers for you and you mum.

Janie

 

[affected]

Penelope how are you doing and your dad?

I've been thinking of you a lot today.

 

[Penelope]

Good morning.

Dad passed away 2 hours ago at 115am. I am typing now as I cannot sleep and am lying in a bed at my parents house trying to wrap my head around this.

He had seemed a little better the last two days we had given him a couple of pieces of good news he seemed keen to type things on his iPad to get across to us. I reassured him those things would be taken care of that we would do everything with Mum in mind and I left the room for the last time telling him I loved him.

He was using morphine 3 hourly in the end there was talk of putting in a driver in the next day or so.

Mum called to check on him 4 hours before he passed he had been a little agitated but once he had meds was resting comfortably.

They called 4 hours later to say he had passed peacefully.

Things I am glad for:-
He could communicate his wishes til the end was lucid comfortable and able to smile a little at good news about his kids/grandkids
He only spent two weeks of his life in hospital in reasonable comfort and not scared
He had marvellous caring staff attending him
That I could tell him I loved him and ease his fears for Mun
That he wasn't scared or sick in his last hours with a temp or infection and that he passed in his sleep
He was strong and stubborn and held onto to his dignity humour to the end and went with out additional intervention or suffering

My sadnesses are for my loss that I can't see him speak to
Him or kiss him again.

I hope his mates were waiting for him with a scotch and soda and a juicy steak and that wherever he is now he can walk talk breathe and be at peace

Thank you all for your comments and support you are an amazing bunch dealing with an awful illness and I salute you and appreciate the time you have given me.

I will be back in to check on you and keep updated.

Fly free Dad I love you forever

 

[affected]

Wrapping you in a virtual hug Penelope. I'm so sorry for the loss of your dad, but as you have so beautifully written he he has flown free and is at peace in a better place eating steak and drinking scotch!

Now be really kind to yourself, you have been on a high alert the past couple of weeks in particular. Keep coming here as you work through this part of things.

What you wrote about your positives was great wisdom - there are many things to be glad for even in the midst of the despair of loss. I am also grateful for each thing on that list.

I didn't want to say earlier, but your dad is now the third of the aussies I've known this week or so, since you started this thread. The other 2 had very peaceful passings as well.

The statistics say that we average 2 deaths per day to MND here in Australia. I've not known anyone personally who has passed for months, now suddenly 3 in a week or so.

You are not alone, so keep posting. How do you think your mum is with it all? How old is she?

I hope you get a bit of a sleep in if you did get off to sleep. hugs

 

[Nikki J]

Please continue this in a new thread I created in In Memoriam