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kbee

New member
Joined
Jan 22, 2007
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Loved one DX
Country
US
State
tennessee
City
nashville
My cousin passed away May 15. I had been fearing that he was near the end. I am so glad that I was there, I ended up spending Monday night with him. He had a rough night that night, he was in such pain and hadn't sleeped in a couple of days. The next morning he said that he felt something was happening. He felt that he wasn't getting any oxygen and when we tried to use that cough assist/suction machine but we got nothing.
His 10 year old son came into the room and my cousin told him "I am afraid that I am not going to be able to take care of you anymore". That was so hard to watch. He asked his mom "what do you want me to do"...she told him that "his father was waiting for him and he would take care him". It was like he was asking permission to give up. His 4 year had been playing with my cell phone and walked in playing one of his favorite songs that we used to play while out on his boat. He smiled and said "we had so much fun and I want you all to take the whole family and continue to go and have fun".
We called other family members and he told us he loved us all and gave us one last kiss. The nurse said it okay for us to give him another drop of morphine. We did and it wasn't long that he was finally able to go to sleep.

I learned alot from many of you not be selfish and to understand that he is a better place now and not suffering anymore. It is still hard and I miss him so much but I know that I will be with him again.
 

brooksea

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Joined
Sep 27, 2006
Messages
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Other
Country
HM
i am so sorry for your loss. thank you for sharing. it is thru brave people like yourself that others who care for PALS gain strength.

cj
 

joelc

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Joined
Jul 15, 2006
Messages
2,786
Reason
PALS
Diagnosis
09/2005
Country
CA
State
BC
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Thank you for sharing this with us. He was a strong and courageous person and I am glad he is not suffering any more.

May God's blessing be with you and family.
 

saska

Active member
Joined
Jan 19, 2007
Messages
93
Reason
Lost a loved one
Country
US
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Colorado
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Lakewood
My sincere condolences to you and your family. I am sure your cousin was comforted by being surrounded by the love of his family at his time of passing. Please take comfort in the fact that you took wonderful care of him; it is so hard to let go. Also, please be very good to yourself in your grief. You are in my prayers.

Sharon
 

CindyM

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Sep 17, 2006
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Reason
Learn about ALS
Country
US
State
New England
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Anytown
Hello Kbee. I am sorry to hear about your cousin. Hug his children and remember his words, he wanted teh family to take care of each other and have good experiences together. My heart goes out to all of you! Cindy
 

liz

Senior member
Joined
Nov 9, 2006
Messages
642
Reason
PALS
Diagnosis
11/2006
Country
US
State
NY
City
Albany
Kbee -

Kbee

I lost a very dear cousin to AIDS (another ugly disease) when we were both quite young. He was just as cussedly optimistic to the end and I treasure that to this day. Some people are so amazing. My cousin has been gone 16 years - I still feel like he is with me and the thought of seeing him again makes this whole having ALS thing seem like less of burden. Having some of my own, I struggle with how the kids will cope but I have come to believe that this experience will ultimately make them stronger than I ever had to be. When I think about all the disadvantaged folks there are in the world, me (just one mom w/ALS) doesn't seem so tragic.

None of this ramble is meant to diminish your loss. Rather it is to emphasize how personally significant a loss can be even in this big wide world. It matters. Our meaning and worth is in our personal relationships and the value we place in one another.

Peace in your time of grief,

Liz
 

vmd

Senior member
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idaho
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N/A
kbee:

I'm sorry for your loss. God will keep you all safe.
 

Al

Moderator emeritus
Joined
May 25, 2004
Messages
7,960
Reason
PALS
Diagnosis
10/2003
Country
CA
State
On
City
NW of Toronto
Sorry for your loss kbee.
AL.
 
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