casual morbid thoughts

Kristina1

Senior member
Joined
Jan 26, 2017
Messages
791
Reason
PALS
Diagnosis
03/2017
Country
US
State
MA
City
Grafton
We wanted to show Remember the Titans to our older two kids (ages 9 and 11). All our movies are in our shared video library but technically they are all owned by MY Amazon account. As I was purchasing Remember the Titans I casually wondered how my family will get all my digital content once I'm dead.

Anyone else have these thoughts? Just so casually morbid?
 

beauty4everyone

Distinguished member
Joined
Jul 5, 2018
Messages
220
Reason
PALS
Diagnosis
04/2018
Country
US
State
GA
City
Someplace
Kristina T, I don't think it's morbid to CONSIDER such things. If there's a way they can access them, write it down. They can feel happy remembering the times shared together watching them. We've discussed such things. It's wise to do so. Gives one peace of mind and you can mark it off your list. Ultimately, I think things left undone trouble one more than doing them.

I'm currently making a list of where family members are buried. I'm the only one who knows. You can find out through www.findagrave.com. It's FREE. As my "gift" to "them", I'm having monuments cleaned and reset, if needed. Perhaps, future family will want to visit. (Picnicking in the cemetery is forbidden - so don't leave any wrappers ;) ) B :cool:

I believe: WISE, IS THINKING. MORBID, IS DWELLING.
 

Nikki J

Moderator
Joined
Mar 22, 2012
Messages
8,432
Reason
PALS
Diagnosis
04/2014
Country
US
State
MA
City
Boston
And the cheery ( not) answer is you can’t transfer them to another account. However if someone has your log in and no one tells amazon they can presumably keep using them.

not morbid. Practical
 

nona

Distinguished member
Joined
Oct 1, 2018
Messages
279
Reason
PALS
Diagnosis
02/2015
Country
US
State
NH
City
NEW LONDON
I wrote a draft obit and started a list of instructions. These are morbid times!
 

KarenNWendyn

Forum Supporter
Moderator
Joined
Jul 29, 2017
Messages
3,401
Reason
PALS
Diagnosis
07/2017
Country
US
State
OR
City
Southern Oregon
I wrote a draft obit and started a list of instructions. These are morbid times!
I did the same — my “post death instructions”. Include passwords and account numbers. I also mentioned who to call. Perhaps some accounts that are in your name only can be changed to shared accounts while you’re still alive. Especially true if you have any bank accounts in your name only.
 

KarenNWendyn

Forum Supporter
Moderator
Joined
Jul 29, 2017
Messages
3,401
Reason
PALS
Diagnosis
07/2017
Country
US
State
OR
City
Southern Oregon
Speaking of casual morbid thoughts, here’s one I thought about—
If I got Coronavirus and got really sick with it but didn’t want to be hospitalized, I wonder if hospice would be willing to see me?
 

EricInLA

Forum Supporter
Active member
Joined
Oct 20, 2019
Messages
35
Reason
PALS
Diagnosis
01/2020
Country
US
State
CA
City
Los Angeles
That's an interesting one Karen. This Coronavirus superimposed on ALS brings a range of thoughts to mind.

In answer to Kristina, I agree with others who have talked about the importance of writing a detailed memo with all the practical information. It's important for the survivors, but equally important for pALS' peace of mind. When I first developed symptoms and was told motor neuron was a possibility, I began composing a detailed memo to my wife with all the important information -- everything from investments and passwords to the more mundane like how often I change the air filters in our house and who to call to flush out the tankless waterheater. I revisit, update, and supplement this memo (which I have on Google Docs) every couple of months. I find that having this ready for whenever it's needed reduces my anxiety about at least that particular aspect of this disease.
 

affected

Guru status reached
Joined
Apr 26, 2013
Messages
12,239
Reason
Lost a loved one
Diagnosis
05/2013
Country
OZ
State
AU
City
lala land
Karen I think that is something well worth discussing with hospice right now. I'm thinking of both sides of the coin - if hospice were caring for you, would the workers also be caring for patients who have corona virus?
It could be a conversation all PALS should be having with carers who come into their home to look after them, that also look after other people.
 

RandomMom

New member
Joined
Jan 26, 2019
Messages
6
Reason
PALS
Diagnosis
01/2019
Country
US
State
NJ
City
Tabernacle
I have been thinking my own morbid thoughts as related to the coronavirus. I’m the lead administrator at my University in coordinating our response to it. We have moved our courses online or the next couple of weeks and some staff will be working remotely, including those with chronic health conditions.

Based on recommendations from the CDC, I probably should stay at home, cancel some upcoming trips (which might happen anyway since so much is shutting down) and wait it out. BUT, I don’t really want to. If my remaining time is limited, I’d rather do things while I still can, make an impact where I can, etc. However, I do keep doubting my decisions.
 

Kristina1

Senior member
Joined
Jan 26, 2017
Messages
791
Reason
PALS
Diagnosis
03/2017
Country
US
State
MA
City
Grafton
I guess my post was more about how casual the thoughts are now. I have been making practical preperations since I was first diagnosed. But whereas these thoughts were once accompanied by a storm of emotions, they now flit casually in and out of my mind without emotion.
 

KarenNWendyn

Forum Supporter
Moderator
Joined
Jul 29, 2017
Messages
3,401
Reason
PALS
Diagnosis
07/2017
Country
US
State
OR
City
Southern Oregon
When faced with a disease that will likely end our lives within 3-5 years (or less, for those of us who may be a few years into it), I think thoughts that the average person rarely has become casual and common for us. I think about my inevitable death every day with the same calmness as I would have thought about what I was having for lunch several years ago. It’s just the reality of our situation. It’s good to make plans.

Regarding Coronavirus (and this could be a separate thread), those of us with respiratory weakness are in the high risk category. I also have asthma, so double whammy. I figure if I got infected, chances are I wouldn’t survive it. Though I’m going to try to avoid getting it, it would also be my ticket out of ALS and I wouldn’t want to be hospitalized. If my CALS got it, I’d be screwed. I have two hired caregivers. My contingency plan is to hire a third and give her a shift every week. If someone gets sick, she’s ready to fill in. If the epidemic gets really bad around here, I may have to hire a fourth. It’s analogous to stocking up on critical supplies.
Random morbid thoughts.
 

KimT

Forum Supporter
Extremely helpful member
Joined
Nov 18, 2014
Messages
3,686
Reason
PALS
Diagnosis
08/2015
Country
US
State
South
City
The Beach
I was out in the pool today and I heard someone say loudly, “I hope Trump tests positive.” It made me wonder what I would do. We have no test kits in our County. I would refuse to go to the hospital and take my chances. I have plenty of drugs. I’m much less afraid of things than I was years ago. And I‘Ve changed my will more than once. It seems so normal.
 

wmilo

Active member
Joined
Feb 14, 2018
Messages
48
Reason
PALS
Diagnosis
10/2017
Country
US
State
PA
City
Zelienople
It seems to me to be expected that PALS (and CALS) would think more about our mortality, both for planning and to have some sense (illusion?) of control over the process. OTOH, it may be like going in to combat - you don't really know how you will react until it happens.
I agree with Beauty's summary above: Wise is thinking; morbid is dwelling.
Best regards,
Bill
 
Top