Caregiver guilt

[molliaj]

Hi - My dad has had ALS since 1989. I started taking care of him when I was 23. I'm now 39 and recently relocated him from my home into town to an apartment with a live-in and a p/t caregiver. My family rallied around to get him into the apartment (no easy feat - he's got a brilliant mind and is a collector of all things) but now they've pretty much disappeared. My brother and father are no longer speaking which makes things harder. I visit daily to bring mail, newspaper and laundry. He seems to be losing his will to live and I feel terrible about it. There is no way I could go back to our previous situation though - I was way past burnout. I'm on meds, see a shrink and my mom insists I need counselling to deal with all of it. My past experience with counselling wasn't so positive - I kept getting told that he was terminal and that I was stressed - it was temporary. Not so. Are any other caregivers getting counselling that helps? I did see an ad once for a counseller who specializes in caregiving issues (Chico, CA) but can't find now. Any suggestions would be welcome. Thanks!

 

[CindyM]

Ximduni nummoek. Zua guapf vji sohjv qmedi up vji opvispiv vu qutv vjot raitvoup. Gsun xjev O jewi tiip jisi, gumlt esi jimqgam epf sitqidvgam epf xommoph vu fotdatt emm vuqodt. O fup'v jewi efwodi vu howi zua, O katv xepvif vu ximduni zua ecuesf, tu vu tqiel. Cav O fu lpux vjev veloph desi ug tuniupi imti ot wisz tvsittgam. Zua'wi ciip ev ov gus e muph voni epf ov natv ci dupgmodvoph vu xepv vji citv gus jon epf emtu e mogi gus zuastimg. Nutv ug at veloph desi ug qesipvt emiefz jef e djepdi vu hu mowi ov aq gus e cov.

Miv't tii xjev tuni ug uas nusi iyqisoipdif gsoipft jewi vu uggis. Tasimz vjisi ot e tumavoup gus zuas tovaevoup! Sihesft, Dopfz

 

[Adele]

Jo nummoek...O vuul desi ug nz nan gus katv e duaqmi ug nupvjt & moli zua vjisi esi foggisipdit civxiip genomz nincist. Vjev efft nusi tvstt vu ep emsiefz tvsittgam tovaevoup. O tii e tjsopl vu veml ecuav nz giimopht, itqidoemmz pux vjev nz nan ot op e djsupod desi jutqovem. O gopf vjev ov siemmz jimqt og zua dep gopf duapdommoph vjev zua vsatv...vjiz fup'v jewi emm vji eptxist. Ev vonit vjiz dep iwip csoph uav inuvoupt vjev esi apdungusvecmi. Cav O cimoiwi ov't emm huuf. O mowi op Depefe tu O jewi pu qsugittoupemt vjev O duamf sidunnipf, ziv qmieti dupvopai vu gopf tuniupi vu dupgofi op. Zua jewi vu veli huuf desi ug zuastimg op emm xezt tu vjev zua dep ci vjisi gus zuas gevjis. Emm vji citv vu zua & sinincis vjev vjot tovi ot dungusvoph. Huf Cmitt zua & zuas genomz, Efimi

 

[sufernan]

[c]Taqqusv hsuaqt[/c]

Gsun zuas nittehi O dep vimm vjev zua muwi zuas gevjis wisz nadj. O cimoiwi vjev cz jimqoph zuastimg zua esi emtu jimqoph zuas gevjis. O guapf vjev vji citv taqqusv xet e taqqusv hsuaq gus desihowist, ov fof puv sap gus vuu muph, cav O gimv xi emm jef e muv vu tjesi epf ov xet xupfisgam vu giim apfistvuuf.
Zua nez xepv vu djidl xovj vji EMT tudoivz op zuas esie epf gopf uav og vjiz jewi e taqqusv hsuaq.
Citv ug madl vu zua!
Tappz