faithandlove
Distinguished member
- Joined
- May 22, 2016
- Messages
- 174
- Reason
- PALS
- Diagnosis
- 06/2016
- Country
- US
- State
- NV
- City
- Reno
Hi everyone,
As hard as I try, nothing sounds good to eat. I was suppose to get a device that would feed me while I slept, but it never came. When I saw the doctor last Friday, he was shocked that I did not get it. Everyone was pointing the finger at everyone else. In the meantime, I've lost an additional 12# this month alone.
My caregivers are pushing water and liquid food in me. I, also, had a bladder infection, and I think it is back again. My husband showed the hospice nurse the color of my urine (brown), and he almost threw it in her face. I'm so glad he didn't. What a mess this month has been.
My husband finally broke down and started throwing things, and yelling at the top of his lungs. After he calmed down, I told him that what he did was emotionally abusive and that I was afraid of him. I wanted to leave and live in a assisted living home. He had said some very hurtful things. He did not understand and thought I was trying to die. He apologized and is back to his sweet self.
I've always loved to eat, so this is new to me. I would never stop eating and try to die, but, because of my current situation, I pray each night for God to take me.
Forgive me if this message does not make any sense. I'm not myself at all and I'm so week. Hopefully, May will be better.
Hugs,
Deb
As hard as I try, nothing sounds good to eat. I was suppose to get a device that would feed me while I slept, but it never came. When I saw the doctor last Friday, he was shocked that I did not get it. Everyone was pointing the finger at everyone else. In the meantime, I've lost an additional 12# this month alone.
My caregivers are pushing water and liquid food in me. I, also, had a bladder infection, and I think it is back again. My husband showed the hospice nurse the color of my urine (brown), and he almost threw it in her face. I'm so glad he didn't. What a mess this month has been.
My husband finally broke down and started throwing things, and yelling at the top of his lungs. After he calmed down, I told him that what he did was emotionally abusive and that I was afraid of him. I wanted to leave and live in a assisted living home. He had said some very hurtful things. He did not understand and thought I was trying to die. He apologized and is back to his sweet self.
I've always loved to eat, so this is new to me. I would never stop eating and try to die, but, because of my current situation, I pray each night for God to take me.
Forgive me if this message does not make any sense. I'm not myself at all and I'm so week. Hopefully, May will be better.
Hugs,
Deb