A year has past...

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soonerwife

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This morning at 4:11 was one year since the love of my life became free of his hell. Or should I say our hell...

I don't even know what to think about that. The hell we went through, is more than I can believe actually. Honestly, how do any of us make it through that?

At 4:11, another kind of hell began. Living life without my best friend...

Missing him does not lessen. I miss him probably more today than I did that day.

Even though, that will always be in my life, missing him, grieving for him, still loving him.

I move forward. One step at a time.

I am able to have fun. I plan for the future. I have made changes that make my life better. I am ok where I am today....

No one knows what my future will hold. But we all know, there will be good days and bad days.

Some days I sing on the way home. Some days I cry all the way home.

I feel like this post is exactly what one year feels like. All over the place, one day at a time, one step at a time.

Thank you all for being my friends and walking along side me during this first year of grief!
 

affected

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I hear you!

Grief has this strange way of getting better and worse at the same time. We never 'get over it', but we do find a way forward in some direction.

This was a beautiful picture of one year, I could totally relate to it. Many hugs to you.
 

JimInVA

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Kim,


Cliff will always be at your side and in your thoughts. He would appreciate that you remember but still elect to move forward into the possibilities for each day's new tomorrow. Thank you for sharing "you" at one year. It gives me hope that I, too, will be able to find moments to sing when the future's inevitable becomes my yesterday's past.


My best...


Jim
 

KateEmerson

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So beautifully written and I understand all that you expressed. Thinking of you as you go through this day of remembrance. Kate
 

Narrowminded

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Thinking of you Sooner and was also taken aback that it’s already been a year. It does not seem like it. While no where near that time line yet, I do understand much of what you wrote. It is a new kind of hell we are face with.

Know my prayers continue for you each day.

Hugs
 

wishmobbing

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I joined the forum just over a year ago and vividly remember Cliff's last days through your posts and the support shown by the forum. You took me on a journey into widowhood without realizing that I would follow so soon, Sooner.
Thank you for sharing and staying with us.
 

soonerwife

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Thanks wish! Those were some dark days for sure. So sorry you followed so soon. I haven't posted to helped as much as I would like but I do get on here most days. This place is the only place I can go that everyone understands what I have been through. Hopefully I will be able to help on here more someday.
 

wishmobbing

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It's not the frequency of posts that's important. Never make this a task. There's days when it's really not good for me to come here. But the understanding of that is here also.
 
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