I sit alone now in the darkest of despair.
I cry my silent tears,
My heart is broken into a million tiny pieces.
The silence is deafening to my ears.
The darkness frightens me,
And the shadows climb the wall.
The loneliness surrounds me,
It takes my breath away,
This is the pattern of my life...
11 months, 16 days, 12 hours, 16 minutes ..... in to this "new life".
Where am I now in the grief process? Stranded, that's where. Am I still angry? Yes! Am I still sad? All the time. Frustration still a factor? You damn well bet! Shock and Numbness still hanging about? check. Still trying to...
I fight my demons like everyone else here. Should have, could have, would have, guilt, all the stuff the comes up at night when I am alone. But for the first time I had to tell people who don't know me (or walk the same path as we do here) that my Husband died. That scary question "Are you...
I woke up on Friday morning and felt everything all at once. All the pain, loneliness, anger, guilt, everything. I didn't know how to feel. I was a zombie most of the day. I didn't care about one single thing. It would not have mattered if the sky fell in on me, or I won the lottery. Just numb...
1. We are not afraid to go to DEFCON 5 for our PAL.
2. We gave up on social skills long ago and don't care what you think.
3. We are already on edge .. careful not to push us over.
4. Where ever there is a PAL... there is a CAL.... WE ARE ALWAYS WATCHING!
5.Chances are we have not had a good...
I can not think that it has been 7 months. I thought of him all day. I am going through a move at the moments (yes another one) and I really could have used his smile today. He always was a wonderful help. You know how many men (sorry guys) would just sit on the couch and let us gals do all the...
Well it has been a little over 6 months since Bran passed away. I am struggling with so many things, when is the time to "move on" (not date or get married or anything like that) but when is it the time to live again and not feel the guilt or pain. When is it time to spread the ashes, should I...
As part of living in Florida, we all know tropical storms and hurricanes are a part of life. Bran and I used to love this time of year. We would scurry about getting things ready for a approaching storm. Popcorn and our favorite movies, flashlights and candles, our favorite treats ..M&M's for me...
It has been 6 months and I miss him everyday. I wrote a letter to him and I thought I would share it. I never thought I would feel this way, I never thought I was in such a dark place, but I am. If I had not called a friend today, I might not have made it though the day in one piece. Some days...
I read all the condolences that i received for the forum from time to time. I keep looking at the names i check the in memory pages and see so many of the same names. We are losing so many, my heart just breaks. I wish there was more I could do. More the Doctors would do. This is such a unfair...