Recent content by Staying strong

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    Something that works

    I honestly always looked at those products as scams ( I'm a lifelong pessimist ) but hearing it from you makes Me want to know more.
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    Now I've become Her Burden

    Thank you Both for the kind words full of wisdom and points to ponder.. My therapist has me going to a Shrink in 2 weeks to talk about Meds. I have mixed feelings about the Meds part but can't continue living this Rollercoaster much longer. Fair to say it isn't a healthy way to start a new...
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    Now I've become Her Burden

    It's been close to 2 years since My Liz was taken from us after a 5 year ALS battle. And yes I have started a new life with a wonderful new Wife. The last 3 months have been horrible. I can't shake the feeling I'm cheating on Liz and shouldn't be happy. Thankfully my 2 children are not only...
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    Guilt is Growing as Re-Marriage comes closer

    Thank you All for the support. And a special thanks to "Tillie" for the private message. I'd like to publicly apologize for typing before I really thought about what I was saying.. especially to someone that has been nothing but thoughtful and supportive all these years. Happy Friday to All.
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    Guilt is Growing as Re-Marriage comes closer

    My Fiancé is well aware and understanding about my feelings.. You've left me feeling a bit judged.. first time ever have I gotten that feeling here.. goodbye All.. Not a safe place to share for Me anymore. My Therapist warned Me that I would encounter people that would question my choices...
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    Guilt is Growing as Re-Marriage comes closer

    Yes.. as my wedding day grows closer the guilt inside Me is becoming a Monster. Never in Million years did I think I would have ended up a " CALS" and never in a Billion years would I've of thought I would re-marry after such a Rollercoaster of 5 years living the ALS life. This is what Liz...
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    Oh the Memories

    Coming up on a Year and a Half for Me.. it's getting easier to remember Lizzy pre-ALS but at times I have to fight to keep the Picture in my head of her last days.. Thinking of You All..
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    50 and widowed

    Happy Birthday!!... I was 50 also when my Lizzy passed.. My Kids for better or worse grew up quick during the 5 year ALS journey. They miss Mommy but speak of her with big smiles and how they know she is with them every day.. As for Me I've tried to look at this point in my life as the start of...
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    Therapy appointment Left Me Guilty

    Greetings All: I've found a new therapist and really made a nice connection with Her and have been going weekly for a few months now.. 2 days ago at my session we talked about Liz ( my late wife and Pals ) and My now Fiancé. It felt rather constructive and good at the time..But not long after...
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    Feeding Tube Formulas

    We saw great results with " Liquid Hope " Over a bunch we tried. We were lucky that my insurance paid for it. My Pals gained weight and strength when we switched to it..
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    A form of closure

    So True.. When your deep in the Routine of being a CALS you almost don't see the decline. You really don't have the time to see it and process it.. Happy to Hear you felt some closure at the service.. Mine moment of closure came strangely the moment My Liz took her last breath in my arms. I felt...
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    Nobody told me

    I'm so very sorry for your loss.. The coming days and months will be a challenge. But as CALS we all know what a challenge feels like. I think most of us thought we were prepared for " The Day " but how can you be. Stay strong and fall apart when you need to.. sending good thoughts your way.
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    The good and the bad

    Thank you for posting this... After getting Engaged last week I've heard the " Shoulds" and " should nots " to my face and whispered behind my back.. no one but a Cals has any idea what it's like to walk a mile in our shoes. My Therapist told me right off the bat that there is no timeline for...
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    Sad when I should be smiling

    With the 1 year anniversary past without to much sadness and My Son getting called back to his job and My Daughter getting into every college she applied to with many scholarship offers I feel like I was in a decent place. My new G/F is wonderful understanding and loving to the 3 of us.. My...
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    I also found comfort in my Therapist.. i held off going for a while until I realized that the way it was effecting me was starting to drag my 2 kids down my " Hole of despair "... it's not about reliving the pain and grief it's about getting tools to help you through the everyday thoughts and...