Phil, I saw your post about family memebers and just wanted you to hear that I do understand. It is much easier to say than to do. I tell Web [his absent selfish adult sons] that their absence from his life is their loss. It is true but it doesn't fill that empty spot in his heart. :[ I encourage him to write each one of them a letter that tells them in written words the love that he has always had for each of them. He has not done it yet but I am hopeful :] I can not even imagine the searing pain that they will live with all of their days because they did not choose to be a part of his life in authentic ways. Hugs to you. Kay Marie