Recent content by Pandora

I sit alone now in the darkest of despair. I cry my silent tears, My heart is broken into a million tiny pieces. The silence is deafening to my ears. The darkness frightens me, And the shadows climb the wall. The loneliness surrounds me, It takes my breath away, This is the pattern of my life...

11 months, 16 days, 12 hours, 16 minutes ..... in to this "new life". Where am I now in the grief process? Stranded, that's where. Am I still angry? Yes! Am I still sad? All the time. Frustration still a factor? You damn well bet! Shock and Numbness still hanging about? check. Still trying to...

I hate that word too! i hated that I joined this club, it sucks. I would give all of my tomorrows for one yesterday. I miss him so much! reminders are everywhere, of what was, what could have been, what can never be. people try to understand and i know they mean well.. but they dont have one...

I wish you the best on the day. I know it will be hard, I had our 8th all by myself. I toasted and had 2 pieces of cake .... it was sad, and happy, tearful, and full of memories.

i am doing alright. School is kicking my butt. I am getting the grades, but it dosent leave time for much anything else. And to tell the truth i am kinda down about it. I see all the kids coupling up and I really miss that. It seems i watch them from the window and play the "I remember when...

I so wish Bran would come to me. Maybe I want it so much, too much. I haven't even dreamed of him. I try.. I think about him every night before I go to sleep... and nothing. I would love a visit, maybe he knows somehow... That I would want to go with him when he had to go. I miss him so very...

I wish him the ease the this monster and I pass all the strength I have to you. You are are not alone, I have walked that path and said goodbye to my husband, best friend, and my only reason for living on. Prayers to you and yours.

We do understand here. There are really great people who have all walked this path. My journey with my husbands ALS was super fast, we got 11 months. I was his only caregiver and things were super fast and there was always an emergency. I am 2 days shy of 9 months since my husband passed away...

Thanks guys. I always feel better after getting the stuff out and i know you guys understand. I will keep on going out and getting what a "normal" life should be. I went through things they can in no way understand and as long as I can look and say I am making a an effort then "BLEEP" what they...

I fight my demons like everyone else here. Should have, could have, would have, guilt, all the stuff the comes up at night when I am alone. But for the first time I had to tell people who don't know me (or walk the same path as we do here) that my Husband died. That scary question "Are you...

there are no words for this... any reply i can think of is dripping with curse words and hate speech. really? just really?

How wonderful you got away and had some fun. Remember that you are important and deserve to do things for yourself. :)

I woke up on Friday morning and felt everything all at once. All the pain, loneliness, anger, guilt, everything. I didn't know how to feel. I was a zombie most of the day. I didn't care about one single thing. It would not have mattered if the sky fell in on me, or I won the lottery. Just numb...

i dont think we get it the worst, we just get to carry it longer.

My husband loved the fireworks. I am thinking he is going to have a better view. I miss him everyday. I would give anything to sit on the bay and watch them with him again. Very lonely this 4th, thats nothing new these days.