Hi Chris,
I see you and Roderick have met--that's great! I'm so sorry your nurse experience wasn't helpful. You were right in my opinion--feeding Shane with the constraints of the Bipap don't give you options which might be "nicer".
You're blessed in getting a deck off your bedroom, and as it's your fall I hope there are many days he can go outside and feel sunshine. That is wonderful. The "Meuris chair" isn't something I've heard of before. Is he able up til now to get out of bed, or is he restricted to bed only, until a wheelchair is found? I hope that this chair situation is worked out quickly while weather is nice.