Forum Follies-- Bushrangers "Down Under"

[BarryG]

"Good on ya Glen, he already looks like a copper" said Ned "OK, lets move out, who is gonna ride in the back of the ute with the mutt?"

No one volunteers. "Well, we cant all ride in the front so someone has to go in the back"

As they hit the road to the bank, Ned is driving with Chico riding shotgun and the rest of the gang is in the back.

Meanwhile Sergeant Barry, Corporal Skippy and Mad Max are on a walkabout in the never never looking for Ned's hideout. "I think that you have gotten us lost" says Barry to Max. "Yeah, that'd be right but no worries mate, it'll be dark soon and we can cook up this big boomer of yours, have a ripper feast and she'll be right in the morning" replies Max'

"Eat Corporal Skippy?, I'd rather eat a trough lolly!" says Barry as he pulls a hidden knife out of his boot to defend his friend. "Ok, don't spit the dummy, there will just be more for me. And you call that a knife, that's not a knife, now THAT'S a knife" says Max as he pulls out a two foot long knife" (you knew this line had to be in here somewhere)

Skippy is looking very nervous as the sun sets....

[peter57]

On the way they lob in at the blacksmiths shop to pick up the gear.

The blacksmith, Billy takes one look at the gang and decides he had better do the right thing with them and offers them a pot.

While they are downing the pot Billy, and his assistant, who has to be a dropkick loads the gear into the ute.

With an Aussie salute off they go.

Two miles down the road Ned pulls over and gets out, time to fit the gear on, pair up and help each other, Rose you are with me, so you can check my arm again

So they pair up and suprise suprise Zaph and Brooksea pair up and head into the bush for a "fitting"

This is going to be a long fitting smiled Ned,

Chico you keep watch and dont shoot through on us, we will be only an hour or two.

Meanwhile Skippy is still awake keeping an eye on Max and his devils

[KeeKer]

Meanwhile poor Colleen mumbles"Why am I always left cooking? Oh, well. I'll just through a few more bugs on the barbie and wait for someone to come and rescue me. At least I'm not up in the air!"
Poochie comes around the corner grinning! She has found something long dead and has rolled in it. She's looking for that dog that thinks it's a police dog! She wants to show him how it's really done! Besides she can out stink Chico anyday!

[rose]

Originally Posted by peter57

Two miles down the road Ned pulls over and gets out, time to fit the gear on, pair up and help each other, Rose you are with me, so you can check my arm again

Chico you keep watch and dont shoot through on us, we will be only an hour or two.

Chico, never one to be a drongo, made a contemptuous sniff in Ned's direction, and went off to find where he could be of real use to the gang.

Rose bent nearer to inspect the wound. "It seems what you need is a good hand warming. I happen to have some dinky-di hand warmers that could just do the trick to keep you out of shock" Ned tried to pull off a brave but yet willing smile to show he was in agreement with this course of follow-up treatment. He closed his eyes and waited..... then, not sensing any warmth, or anything else for that matter, he sneaked a peek in hopes that the delay was due to "preparation" and that he was to recieve the Deluxe Hand and Arm Warming, rather than the Standard Method.

The gleaming blade of Rose's knife came swiftly into focus.

[thelma313]

Meanwhile Chico was making his way to the bank to carry out his mission. He hoped that figjam, Poochie wasn’t going to show up and foil his scheme but as he trotted along the Yarra River, enjoying a vegemite sandwich, he happened upon a real beaut from the Lucky Country who, coincidently was enjoying her own vegemite sanger.

"Holy dooley, Olivia Newton John!"

"G’day Chico, where are you off to today lookin’ like a full-on spunk?"

"Oh you know, just trying to make a quid, gotta run but I loved you in Xanadu!"

"Thanks, Mate!"

"Hooroo, Olivia!"

Chico continued on his way, just a rip snorter of a Schnoodle, off to join his mob in pulling off a corker of a bank robbery.

[BarryG]

The gang, all back together again, are all suited up outside the bank. Ned hadn't ended up with his hand warmers after all, it was all just a misunderstanding with Rose and the knife, she was just going to loosen off his bandage and the knot was too tight.

Once she had attended to Ned's needs she announced "Sorry mate but I gotta shoot through cause one of my rellies needs me" With that she flags down a passing road train heading for the big smoke and hops on board.

"Well anybody else want to chuck a sickie? No? Ok. Let's tee-up and hit this place and relieve these tall poppies of some moolah" Cries Ned as he barges into the bank followed by Zaph, Brooksea, Rosella, Glen and Colleen (who has just flown in from the hut).

Chico and Poochie arrive on the scene just in time to see gang head into the bank and to also to see Sargeant Barry arrive by himself. Skippy and Mad Max had faced off in the Thunderdome and two men entered (well OK, one man and one kangaroo) but only one left. And that one was ..... Skippy who KO'd Max with a sucker punch and a quick tail jab. With that win Skippy decided that his future was in the WWE or the NHL so he left Barry and headed to the coast to ogle the white pointers.

[GlenBrittle]

Chico and Poochie meet just outside the door to the bank and do the customary butt sniffing.

Chico ask "What is that intoxicating odor Poochie?"

"Eau de dead wombat" remarks Poochie "It took me three rolls to get it on right"

Poochie comments that Chico is not wearing anything noteworthy .. "Whats up?"

"When I start wagging my tail furiously , head for a human" says Chico " I had two bowls of roo stew. "

A patron of the bank runs out through the door and the canine stinkers enter the bank to see Ned and his gang being forced to wait in line for a teller.

Chico and Poochie start meandering through the line of patrons. Poochie gets an immediate reaction. Chico runs around the counter and and barks. One of the bank clerks mentions "What a cutie you are all dressed up" when Chico does the drop and run . The clerk throws up on the spot.

Coughing and gagging spreads through the bank . People in line are running for the door.

[peter57]

They score the moolah and head utside to see Sargent Barry outside, removing his jacket. Whats going on said Colleen.

Well i have had my eye on this little place in NSW for some time and the only way to get the dosh for it is to team up with you guys.

Well then said Ned thats fine by me, we didnt want to plug you, even though you almost killed me.

Lets all hop in the ute and head out of town before the fuzz turns up
So the 7 of them pile into the ute with Chico and Poochie.
Whats that goddam stink said Rosella,
Why its the dogs replied Zaphoon, look at them trying to stink each other out, get out of the ute and run behind we are not going far and it might give you a chance to wear some of the stink off, as he leans over the side and does another liquid laugh.

They head down the road dogs running behind, sucking on one for the road and throw downs.

[peter57]

At a truck stop they stop to divide up the loot, 250 quid per person.

Ok guys what are you going to do with your share.

Well Barry said, it enough for my piece of dirt in NSW so i am off.
Wait a minute said Colleen, you wouldnt like some company, like the dogs would you?
Sure if you come too, replied Barry with a smile, why not replied Colleen, i am ready for a change.

Zaphoon replied, me and Brooksea have decided to set up a business selling flower pots from the gear we had made from the blacksmiths, only we are going to import them from China and make a killing.

Glen said i am just going walkabout for a while and see what comes up.

and you Rosella? me i think i might go to the big smoke and see if i can find a Sandgroper or two for a good time.

And you Ned ?
Me i just might roam around here for a while and chill out.
Who knows i might find another place to rob, if i do any takers?

Too right mate they all replied before heading their seperate ways.

Ned watched them go and headed back to the shack to sink a long neck or two, grinning like a shot fox because in his helmet was another 500 quid.

oh happy days oh happy days, he hummed as he headed off.

[Five]

Strewth!! this is such entertainment. Not quite brave enough to join in yet, huge kudos to Peter's kick-off and to all the rest... well, I would hardly know that you weren't true blue! Bravo! Bravo!

[thelma313]

G'day Everyone, thanks for the entertainment!
Peter, thank you for sharing a slice of Australia's colourful history and culture with us. I'm so relieved the bank robbery went off with a hitch. I only wish I could have participated more, but I worked all day Saturday and spent the day on Sunday with my handsome dad.

Have a splendid Monday, Everybody!

[mare]

This is the REAL reason Al started the new topics- he needed somewhere to put the Follies! LOL
And, the rant section for people to say (about the said follies) "WTF are they talking about?" (so sorry about the language; not very lady-like, but felt it said it all! LOL)

[Blackpool]

Thanks for the entertainment.Such talent from all of you. Great stuff.

[BarryG]

Thanks Peter for the ripper follies! I am now on my piece of sod that I purchased with my share of the loot. My new place is somewhere (not exactly sure where) between Delinquent and Stud Park and Skippy came back just like a boomarang after he discovered that he wasn't so tough after all.

I had fun and learned a lot of very useful words and phrases too! Way to go!

Barry

[BethU]

Great follies, everybody! Great set-up, Peter! And we actually had a plot this time! What progress !!!!

Now, Whooooo's going to volunteer for Halloween??

Methinks it might be up PZ's alley? Or Glen's? Or ... ??