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pepsiman

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Feb 4, 2009
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445
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Lost a loved one
Country
US
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NY
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Latham
I posted over on the Family Hurts thread about my talk last night with Liz's best friend. Well after that talk, and after the boy's went to bed, my 18 year old stayed up and we talked...for three hours. No topic was off limits, we talked sex, drugs (she's been experimenting a little with that "herbal remedy"), school, life and love and everything else that came to mind. She's got a remarkable head on her shoulders, just like her mother. I was amazed by what she was interested in discussing and what was verboten between her and her mother. We had a meaningful discussion about sex (not the, use condoms, don't get pregnant discussion she had with her mother), with no embarrassment and no judgement. We had a similar discussion about drugs and alcohol. I told her the story of our love, memories I hold dear, things we never resolved, just everything.

As I said, she's 18 and even if I wanted to, I can't effectively tell her what to do anymore. She does however, apparently, have great respect for me and my opinions. This amazes me in light of the events of the last year and particularily the last four months.

I think I've developed a rapport with this daughter of mine. One I hope will last the rest of my life. I can only hope to reach each of my other three kids in such a deep and meaningful way. Now I'm crying, but these are happy tears. I am dad, and mom now, and I think I might just be able to pull this off.

Dick
 
Boast away my friend!
 
Dick, darling Dick, you have just given me the first smile of the day and it is hald past six in the evening so it was overdue.
That is just SUCH good news. Send loads and loads of love to your daughter and if she needs to come and practise her French she- will be welcome, though she'd end up having to do the cooking:)
 
Iris, I am so glad to be able to give you that smile. I just read your post over in the PALS section. You deserve all the smiles we can give you. I'm sure Joanne would love to visit you, she's gone as far as anyone can go in HS French here in the US (her last standardized test placed her third in the country). I'm afraid though, like her mother, she's not much of a cook. ;)

Dick
 
Hey Dick with language skills like that who needs to cook.. I think the kitchen is for looks anyway.lol.. That is amazing, you are doing a great job. I think so much of you, and I love that you have continued Liz's journey with us. I always thought of her a such a smart and dynamic lady, can only imagine her children are the same.. Boast often and a lot.. I love hearing it..
 
Yes, they are an amazing bunch of kids, and I try to make sure they know it, often. Personally, I would have preferred that we had practiced making babies a little longer before popping them all out. ;) But such was not to be the case. It's all good though.

Dick
 
Is your daughter still doing French. She is welcome to write to me to practise if she likes. And we can live on sandwiches while she's here. Does history interest her? Here practically everything dates from tenth, eleventh century, like she would never have seen in US.Tell her from me PLEASE to cut the herb out of her life right now cos it is much much more dangerous than people realise. THAT WONT BE you NAGGING? BUT me;
i too think it fantastic that you have kept coming here.
 
The money she saves by not buying the "herb" could go towards an airplane ticket to France! 8)8)
 
She hasn't used it enough to have actually bought any yet. It'd be a hard sell to try to convince her on the grounds that it's dangerous, unless someone found a connection between it and ALS. Liz was pretty much continually stoned throughout high school (long before i met her). Joanne knows this, the fact that she has actually made it to her senior year without touching it impresses me greatly. I think she'll navigate this minefield okay, like I said she's got a good head on her shoulders.
Dick
 
Congrats to you Mr. Mom! Thank you for sharing. That put a little sunshine into my day...
 
Wow Dick - I justed scrolled down and read the full thread. Like I told my oldest boy, who's 19, - it appears I might not have screwed you up too badly, despite my best efforts. You are doing a great job - I'm hoping to connect on that level with my three kids also.
 
Alas, irismarie, Joanne says she doesn't have time for a trip to France. She refuses to listen to you nag her about the reefer either (she's sitting right behind me telling me all of this). Madame says Joanne already writes the language better than she does. She's a very busy young woman, she works three or more days a week in the cafeteria at the hospital, carries a course load full of AP classes in High School, plus of course she has friends. I even need to make an appointment to take her out for dinner. She's off to Delaware State in the fall for their Foreign Language program, with a minor in film. She's got it together pretty well, I'm just glad she let me in before she ran off to college. It could have gone either way.

I'm also glad to hear that several of you still like to see me post here. I've wondered at times if maybe everyone would just as soon I stop. I feel sort of like an interloper now that Liz is gone, but I continue because I believe Liz's story won't be done until there's no
one left to remember her. I intend to remember her, and to make sure our kids remember her, at least until I'm gone.

Dick
 
Dick, she will live & be remembered forever in your hearts. The kids will never forget!

Personally, I am glad to see you here; as long as it doesn't cause you any added stress.
 
Dick, this forum is for anyone affected by this awful disease so there is no way that you are an interloper, you have as much right and need to be here as anyone else. I enjoy your honesty and your openness in describing how ALS has affected you and your family. Although I did not talk to her much I think that Liz would be proud of you both for what you are telling us and for what you are doing to raise your kids.
 
What the hell? Interloper? Give me a break Dick! We love you...you are an integral part of this community now. Don't you go away! I always look forward to your posts. Just wish I didn't have to read any for the obvious reasons!
 
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