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Anja

Active member
Joined
Mar 24, 2012
Messages
91
Diagnosis
06/2012
Country
NL
State
zh
City
The Hague
Just want to say GRRRRRRRR.... shout etc. I feel angry & sad now and due to not working left hand can't express what i want to, 1 hand typing sucks big time! :cry:

My new neuro from university hospital wanted me to have the emg earlier, but today i was called it is impossible, so have to wait till May 21... grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.... i'm getting crazy! But i can do it, but hate it...

I am not asking 4 anyone to feel sorry 4 me, just want to yell & scream! My already weak foot and part of leg is now also showing spasm, grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr i had no idea, my PT told me today :(

& much more i'd want to scream & yell about i now have a super down moment, and can't even write/type all i'd want to, i know about dragon, but don't have the money yet so another yell/rant/screaam....

I feel sad, angry and scared! I had it with not being able to walk normal, i HATE it GRRRRRRRR, sorry 4 CAPS if i'd use voice now you all would need ear protection :D

I will stop now, sorry dear people 4 this weak moment, hope you don't think i'm thinking i'm pathetic or so, i'm not, just needed to express...

Thanks 4 listening :)
 
Anja,

We've all been there and we will probably return there sooner than we hope. Rant all you want.
 
Dear Anja, like TR said we have all had these moments when we feel angry, sad and scared when body parts don't work and we cry, scream and yell too.
It's okay, it sucks but it's okay, you can do that here, among friends who listen and understand. :)
 
I hear you Sweetie! I PMd you a link that might help.
 
I feel like the famous painting Silent Scream. I can't scream...I want to scream at times! We are here to support you on your good days and rotten days. Hugs..Becky
 
In the beginning, it seems like all I did was rant!
 
Rant away Anja, we all can relate, and is ok. So sorry though.
 
It's okay Anja, rant all you want. We really do understand.
 
Just want to say GRRRRRRRR.... shout etc. I feel angry & sad now and due to not working left hand can't express what i want to, 1 hand typing sucks big time! :cry:

My new neuro from university hospital wanted me to have the emg earlier, but today i was called it is impossible, so have to wait till May 21... grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.... i'm getting crazy! But i can do it, but hate it...

I am not asking 4 anyone to feel sorry 4 me, just want to yell & scream! My already weak foot and part of leg is now also showing spasm, grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr i had no idea, my PT told me today :(

& much more i'd want to scream & yell about i now have a super down moment, and can't even write/type all i'd want to, i know about dragon, but don't have the money yet so another yell/rant/screaam....

I feel sad, angry and scared! I had it with not being able to walk normal, i HATE it GRRRRRRRR, sorry 4 CAPS if i'd use voice now you all would need ear protection :D

I will stop now, sorry dear people 4 this weak moment, hope you don't think i'm thinking i'm pathetic or so, i'm not, just needed to express...

Thanks 4 listening :)


Been there done that, hey I have dragon 8 it it helps I can send it to you.
 
Anja. You have every right to rant and rave. So sorry. Thinking of you. Yasmin.
 
We're all there with you Anja! Rant away!
 
thank you dear friends, sorry i was away for so long, i felt BAD! And i feel confused, i was called by hospital EMG was sooner, i had it a week ago, and i might have ALS or MMN... and after 3 hrs of EMG doctor told me they also found an obstruction, so no diagnoses yet, 1rst MRI of left upper arm now to view if there is any.. i'm sure there is not, same story was 4 right leg, obstruction found in EMG in the knee, MRI showed none... if it was a slap stick i'd laugh about it but it isn't....

Tomorrow calling hospital... they promised to call me last Monday, they didn't, i waited with patience, not anymore... i want answers! But also i feel depressed, like i don't care anymore, grrrrrrrrrrr

JLRNL i'll PM you!

Thanks again friends! Big higs 4 you!
 
Anja,
Rant away....

panguinjen hugs and thanks!

Wish i could writing 1 hand is horror, so slow, wish i could record voice rant and upload but can't post that yet don't know when i can, grrrrrrrrrr

I hate the situation, i hate it everything goes so slow, i hate it i can't move anymore, i hate it not to know what is wronh with me, i hate it i got no real answer and another 'obstruction' showed on EMG, same happend on EMG of right leg but on MRI nothing was found... i hope they find an obstruction, because then i don't have or might not have ALS or MMN... CONFUSING... i hate it... i feel tired... so tired... i hope i have the strength tomorrow to call the hospital, i will let you know...

Tnx 4 listening!

XOXOXO
Anja
 
Oh btw my fingers they hurt like hell because i can't stretch them anymore 4 months, cramps, anyone have a clue what to do about that? I have Gabapentine but that doesn't help, it only makes me feel groggy, dizzy, etc. grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr sorry 4 ranting so much, i don't want to feel sorry 4 myself or look like pathetic or something like that, i feel shit 4 sure... down is what i feel like... and angry, at anyone, wish i could stop that...

Now enough, i go sleep, it is 2 am here, time 4 bed, hope i can sleep...
 
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