glupavomomiche
Distinguished member
- Joined
- Sep 25, 2011
- Messages
- 282
- Reason
- PALS
- Diagnosis
- 09/2011
- Country
- US
- State
- Texas
- City
- Podunk
Well, here goes my first rant.
It's like this...
I have a younger brother. My parents emancipated him and let him get married to his knocked up girlfriend when he was 15. He has occasionally held a job, but never uses that income to pay actual bills. He has three children that we actually know and see (two from the first wife, and another from a 15-year-old girl he knocked up when he was 22, plus quite a few we "accidentally" found out about that are floating around town). My brother has now moved off to another city 6 hours away and left these kids behind. My parents are dealing with the ex-wives and baby mommas and spend a large amount of their time and money on these children. They have done this for 12 years now.
Now here I am, with ALS and a 4 year old on my own. My ex is still sorta in the picture, not romantically or me taking him back or anything like that. He's trying to get a job here so he can help take care of our son. Not thrilled about the prospect of him invading my territory (hometown) but it is the best for my son.
My parents keep telling me they are going to take care of me. They have moved into a house right down the street from me and plan to move into my house when the time comes. But the thing is... they have my nieces around (and their insane mommas) all the time. They are constantly dealing with these women who beg for (and steal) money and anything they can get their hands on. Take take take take take. And my parents let it happen.
I have always been the responsible one who took care of myself. I never asked for money. I never asked for help. But now, I have to ask for help. But I'm really afraid it's not going to be there. The times that I have needed help recently, I was put on hold for them to take care of the girls. That's ok now, but what about later on when I really do need help for every little thing. I don't think they're going to have time for me, much less for helping take care of my son. And quite frankly, I can't deal with all those little girls. On bad days, I can barely tolerate my own son, much less the offspring of my idiot brother. I certainly don't want to deal with their mommas or want them anywhere near my home.
So when I announced that I was thinking that down the line it would be a good idea for my son to go live with my ex full time and I would move to some kind of assisted living or nursing facility, the sh!t really hit the fan. I'm selfish. I'm taking their grandson away from them. It's their disease too and I'm not letting them do what they feel they need to do for me. Etc, etc, etc.
Am I really being selfish? Or am I just being realistic? Isn't it my right to decide what I do?
It's like this...
I have a younger brother. My parents emancipated him and let him get married to his knocked up girlfriend when he was 15. He has occasionally held a job, but never uses that income to pay actual bills. He has three children that we actually know and see (two from the first wife, and another from a 15-year-old girl he knocked up when he was 22, plus quite a few we "accidentally" found out about that are floating around town). My brother has now moved off to another city 6 hours away and left these kids behind. My parents are dealing with the ex-wives and baby mommas and spend a large amount of their time and money on these children. They have done this for 12 years now.
Now here I am, with ALS and a 4 year old on my own. My ex is still sorta in the picture, not romantically or me taking him back or anything like that. He's trying to get a job here so he can help take care of our son. Not thrilled about the prospect of him invading my territory (hometown) but it is the best for my son.
My parents keep telling me they are going to take care of me. They have moved into a house right down the street from me and plan to move into my house when the time comes. But the thing is... they have my nieces around (and their insane mommas) all the time. They are constantly dealing with these women who beg for (and steal) money and anything they can get their hands on. Take take take take take. And my parents let it happen.
I have always been the responsible one who took care of myself. I never asked for money. I never asked for help. But now, I have to ask for help. But I'm really afraid it's not going to be there. The times that I have needed help recently, I was put on hold for them to take care of the girls. That's ok now, but what about later on when I really do need help for every little thing. I don't think they're going to have time for me, much less for helping take care of my son. And quite frankly, I can't deal with all those little girls. On bad days, I can barely tolerate my own son, much less the offspring of my idiot brother. I certainly don't want to deal with their mommas or want them anywhere near my home.
So when I announced that I was thinking that down the line it would be a good idea for my son to go live with my ex full time and I would move to some kind of assisted living or nursing facility, the sh!t really hit the fan. I'm selfish. I'm taking their grandson away from them. It's their disease too and I'm not letting them do what they feel they need to do for me. Etc, etc, etc.
Am I really being selfish? Or am I just being realistic? Isn't it my right to decide what I do?