Wife and I are losing our minds over temperature

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TomSanti

Active member
Joined
Sep 8, 2017
Messages
62
Reason
PALS
Diagnosis
07/2011
Country
US
State
California
City
Mariposa
With all the thousands of posts and replies on this board I could be divorced by the tiime I have searched so I apologize if I am being redundant and have no problem should this be moved to a different thread.

Here's the deal, I am in my late 50s, my wife in her mid-50s she is hip deep in menopause and I am skin and bones from this damn disease. As the weather is cooling off I get cold very easily usually 75° is my threshold, for her anything above 65° and she is "roasting" last night we had our biggest fight in our 29 years of marriage. Our primary source of heat is a wood burning stove and firewood is expensive. Prior to my getting sick, and her beginning menopause the roles were completely reversed, she was easily chilled and I was trying to conserve firewood and told her to bundle up when she was cold (A fact that she never allows me to forget) rather than wasting firewood keeping the house at more than 80°. Fast-forward to today, I am so weak that even a longsleeved T-shirt becomes too restrictive so bundling up is no longer a viable option for me. I don't know how we are going to overcome this (ALS is nothing by comparison). Somebody please advise if you can.

God bless you all,

Tom
 
I use heating pads set at low heat on my bed. I tried the special low heat mattress covers but they didn't work for me. They might work for you. I have a heated lift chair but also add a heating pad. Just make sure you don't turn the heat too high because you don't want to get burned.

I keep my A/C set at 75. I would freeze if it were any lower. 75-76 seems to be my sweet spot with A/C and heat.
 
Have you tried an adaptive acrylic shower poncho? Your wife can put it on over your head. It helps keep you warm and is loose enough not to restrict you.
 
Thanks Kim,

I use an electric blanket underneath the sheet on my bed which allows me to use a lighter blanket and that works out really well. Unfortunately, that is not where the problem lies. When I get into trouble is when I am in the PWC either around the house or out in public where there's a draft or the temperature drops and my exposed skin, namely my arms get cold. I have tried lightweight longsleeve tees including thermal but they interfere with my ability to move my arms around in order to control the PWC. A blanket is even worse, helpful as long as I am sitting still but that's just not me.

She is due to arrive home from work any minute and I'm hoping that date night will earn me some forgiveness for losing my temper last night... or, she may not come back at all :-?
 
Interesting idea Laurie, I will give that a try.

Thanks,

Tom
 
Tom,

You might also look into bicycle arm warmers (found in bicycle shops or on line). They are basically detachable sleeves that cover only the arms. You can get them in a breathable wicking fabric or even in a fleecy material for colder weather. There are also similar bicycle leg warmers.
 
Also, if you have not already are you able to tolerate warm clothing in other parts of your body? If you warm your core, your head your feet and legs it does mitigate the arms a little. I am very cold intolerant so I sympathize
 
Tom - for the chair, I too would suggest a cape of some sort. Their are definitely a lot of them in the women's department in the stores, at least here. That would be a quick fix. If one of you has some sewing ability, you could make one yourself from a blanket. The sleeves suggested might also work for you.

Hugs,

Sue
 
Tom I am sorry for all the stress that this disease is causing you and your wife. It has to be so scary for both of you. And human nature being what it often is, we lash out at those we love the most over the smallest issues. People were mentioning capes and this is a source for them from a good company that makes adaptive clothing. I have ordered from them and quality is good. Men's Adaptive Outerwear - Silvert's Adaptive Clothing & Footwear I hope the current stressor sorts itself out. Best regards to you.
 
Thanks everyone for your suggestions, I haven't had an opportunity to try the poncho yet, we're experiencing a couple of days of warm weather. I have ordered the bicycle sleeves (pretty remarkable how inexpensive stuff is when it is not specifically designed/intended for the disabled) even my poncho with only $10 and that was at Universal Studios in Orlando (it rained almost the entire time we were there, It was perfect)
 
The lightest and warmest thing I can think of is a Polartec poncho. I cannot stand anything heavy on my bed but I have polartec blankets and will look for clothing of this material. I couldn't find a pic with man's version but I know they have them.
 

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You could probably have one made for you out of the blankets. Lands End has lots of the blankets and they're good quality.
 
I know how that goes. I just recently got my wife to understand that that turning the thermostat up to eighty instead of seventy five doesn't warm up the house any quicker...
 
You've gotten some good suggestions here Tom. I would like to add to the suggestions that perhaps a down or synthetic "down" vest used with the arm warmers might be a good option? The vest would allow good freedom of movement in your arms. Down is the warmest substance I know of given the warmth to weight ratio.
 
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