Old 05-16-2016, 04:20 AM #1 (permalink)
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Default Man Up - Grow a Pair

As most of the PALS here are males I am aiming this at them. Man Up - Grow a Pair!!

Our caregivers are the most wonderful people out there and we just selfishly take and take from them. We don't physically or emotionally help them. It's time that we see them as more important than ourselves and treat them like the Princess' they are.

I don't want to hear any bull sh1t about I cant do this or I cant do that - Pusscakes!

You can communicate you can do little things - let them know how special they are and for Gods sake stop WHINING at them!

I cant do this, I cant do that, I feel this way, or I feel that way, poor me I am dying of ALS wah, wah, wah - bunch of frickin panty waist! Quit IT! Your suppose to be their Knight in Shinning Armor start acting Like it.

OH one last thing, if you don't like this why don't you go find a little corner to cry about it in until your mother brings you a bottle. The truth hurts, get over it and treat that little lady like shes something special!

We are a generation of deutsch bags!
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Old 05-16-2016, 08:06 AM #2 (permalink)
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Default Re: Man Up - Grow a Pair

There are times when I want to say things like that too, and not just to men. Women can be total wusses as well!
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Old 05-16-2016, 08:56 AM #3 (permalink)
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Default Re: Man Up - Grow a Pair

Haha, why don't ya really tell us how ya feel Pete! I totally agree ! I find myself mostly acting not so much as a whimp or on the piety pot but just angry and frustrated right in the transition spot between falling off a plateau and learning to live with the new reality. Good on ya Pete for keeping it real thanks. Chally
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Old 05-16-2016, 09:41 AM #4 (permalink)
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Default Re: Man Up - Grow a Pair

I don't want to hear any bull sh1t about I cant do this or I cant do that - Pusscakes!

Glad you got that out of your system, Pete! The above sentence was my was my favorite and make me laugh! The stress of this disease is incredible and so hard on everyone around us. When I feel the urge to complain I find it better to go silent into a meditative state.

Hope that all you Puss cakes have a great day!
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Old 05-16-2016, 10:48 AM #5 (permalink)
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Default Re: Man Up - Grow a Pair

sticky time?

i trust in your pair, displayed in your courage to insult all pals

i am in awe of your bravery and wisdom,

pat
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Old 05-16-2016, 12:36 PM #6 (permalink)
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Default Re: Man Up - Grow a Pair

To each his own. Don't want any part of those on the pity pot, but wish to console those who need sincere compassion. Perhaps I missed a post that generated this thread? ?
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Old 05-16-2016, 03:04 PM #7 (permalink)
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Default Re: Man Up - Grow a Pair

Quote:
Originally Posted by frankb View Post
To each his own. Don't want any part of those on the pity pot, but wish to console those who need sincere compassion. Perhaps I missed a post that generated this thread? ?
Some of us feel like enough of a burden. I know I do. I feel guilty for not being able to be the one who cares for the sick at my church. Each PALS journey is their journey. We don't share everything here.

Pete, if your post made you feel better, so be it. If it helped some PALS, that's good too.
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Old 05-16-2016, 04:28 PM #8 (permalink)
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Default Re: Man Up - Grow a Pair

i am in Jersey, maybe u could show me how to do this. please never remove that post or this thread, the guidance is illuminating.

this man up idea, please do that with your post above. never remove it, please.

any more lessons on manhood? or can u offer more direction the masses how to be better pals? for any possible doubters of your wisdom, maybe qualify, how long have u been manning up? also how long have u had als, what condition are u in?

please teach,

pat
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Old 05-16-2016, 11:12 PM #9 (permalink)
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Default Re: Man Up - Grow a Pair

Pat,
We let people vent/rant here, as long as they keep it R-rated and do not make personal attacks. Please respect that intent.

Best,
Laurie
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Old 05-17-2016, 02:31 AM #10 (permalink)
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Default Re: Man Up - Grow a Pair

thank u for the warning Laurie. i am surprised, but i will act accordingly. i apologize for being out of order here.

i have known courageous pals and cals,

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Old 05-17-2016, 07:03 AM #11 (permalink)
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Default Re: Man Up - Grow a Pair

To answer a few questions. The idea for this post came after reading a couple of the CALS post where the CALS where not being treated the way a women should be let alone a women who cares for our needs the way they do. My wife and I have often talked about how "men" just do not treat women the way they should.

I was diagnosed in late November 2014 after a 2 year ride on the medical roller coaster to find out what was going on. My condition, I have respiratory onset, and while I can still use most of my parts my respiratory system is all but gone and I have been directed by my clinic to get Hospice care.

I do not take exception to anyone's comments - fire away.

Rules for Manning Up!


1) The object of your love is more important than you are - You are not the issue but the one you love is. Stop thinking about yourself and all your "woes" and start thinking about your lady. This is the most important rule and all other rules come from this one.

2) The little things matter - Open the damn door for her. "But I'm in a wheelchair and its to hard" my guess is that even when you where not in a chair you didn't open it for her either, you just opened it and went in yourself and left her behind. I see it every day and it is rude, inconsiderate and shows a complete lack of testicles. I wheel my chair to the door and open it - its the way a man does things. Send her flowers. You are reading this so the computer works - let her know shes special.

3) Take the bullet for her - I would die for my wife, I say it and I mean it. If you say it, than do it. Anything that comes into our lives that can hurt her is a bullet, bad physical news, in laws, visitors, etc. Step in front of it ("But I am in a wheelchair" - Then roll in front of it). Blunt every shot if not remove it. So you hurt - who cares! She is more important than you! A man with a pair always takes the difficulties and the hardships and uses himself to shield her, stop whining and focus on protecting.

I can add more rules if the estrogen in your whimp a$$ body is keeping the above rules from getting through to your scrotum.

Live by the rules!
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Old 05-17-2016, 07:47 AM #12 (permalink)
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Default Re: Man Up - Grow a Pair

You are one of a kind Tripete! Actually, maybe not one of a kind. I married a man like you 20 years ago. He has treated me like a queen for the last 20 years. I feel lucky to have be his queen. I will do anything to see him happy and make his days the best they can be. There should be more like you!
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Old 05-17-2016, 07:57 AM #13 (permalink)
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Default Re: Man Up - Grow a Pair

As a Male Caregiver to my Wife I have to admit She is the Stronger one out of the two of us 99% of the time.. I find myself feeling like I should grow a set and Man up.. But I agree this is a place where people should feel free to Vent.. Just my 2 cents
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Old 05-17-2016, 08:42 AM #14 (permalink)
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Default Re: Man Up - Grow a Pair

Pete, I commend you. I love it when I see men treating their wives this way. Your wife is a lucky woman.
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Old 05-17-2016, 12:31 PM #15 (permalink)
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Default Re: Man Up - Grow a Pair

Pete I really admired the guts you had to lay out your thoughts on supporting CALS. I agree with what you say, but know it can be hard for people to hear as our personalities are so different in response to diseases that take away so much of the person. Some do man up and some do the opposite. As a RN for all my working life, I am witness to how people respond to devastating illness and disease. The experts say that ones response hinges on your premorbid personality (personality before the illness). I think there is a lot of truth in that premise. The "my glass is half full" personalities often died with their glasses half full, and the "my glass is half empty" often died with their glass half empty. I think what you wrote is excellent as it might make some of the "glass if half empty" personalities try a little harder to at least show some kindness and thankfulness to their CALS. But I also believe that some of those "glass half empty" personalities have been through hell in their formative years, and thus became that way due to lack of some of the basics like love and support in their youth. But shaking up people and making them think is what you did Pete, and that is very admirable in my books. We are never too old or too sick to be humane to the ones we love. Sending you a huge bear hug.
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