Post things to cheer up people - Page 17

happy · 08-22-2008, 08:59 PM

Sorry for offending you...but that was not racial. It's a fact of life, there is such a thing as black and white...and it is not a secret that some cultures speak differently...I live in Ca a very culturally diverse place I even told this joke to a good friend who is black...she loved it. It is only offensive to those who are eager to find the differences. What about polish jokes or the like do you find those racially offensive?

I do not apologize for trying to find humor in life...no one was targeted here.

happy · 08-22-2008, 09:35 PM

And one more thing, looking back at the other jokes what about drunks, there are those you know...it's a real disease too, or people that love Jesus they might be totally offendend, or people with Missippi accents what about that can you deny that they have a different accent than most? Come on where did your funny bone go? This really annoys me.

happy · 08-22-2008, 10:15 PM

Actually the more I think about it I am kinda offended myself that you would even think Iwas tring to be racial...take a look at my profile I have posted some pictures of my best friends..under Happy's Group. I've got to leave this alone.

BethU · 08-22-2008, 10:23 PM

OK, let's try this one....

An old man wanted to hoe his potato patch, but couldn't manage it alone, and his only son was in prison.

He wrote his son, "I guess I won't be able to plant potatoes this year, without you here to help me."

Son wrote back, "Dad, for heaven's sake, don't dig up the garden! That's where I buried the guns!"

Next day, a dozen FBI agents and a platoon of cops showed up and dug up the garden. Finding nothing, they apologized and left.

Day after that, the man got a letter from his son: "Dear Dad, go on and plant the potatoes. This was the best I could do under the circumstances."

BethU

rose · 08-22-2008, 11:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BethU

OK, let's try this one....

An old man wanted to hoe his potato patch, but couldn't manage it alone, and his only son was in prison.

He wrote his son, "I guess I won't be able to plant potatoes this year, without you here to help me."

Son wrote back, "Dad, for heaven's sake, don't dig up the garden! That's where I buried the guns!"

Next day, a dozen FBI agents and a platoon of cops showed up and dug up the garden. Finding nothing, they apologized and left.

Day after that, the man got a letter from his son: "Dear Dad, go on and plant the potatoes. This was the best I could do under the circumstances."

BethU

rose · 08-22-2008, 11:39 PM

Following a funeral service, the pallbearers are carrying the casket out of the church when they accidentally bump into a wall. From inside the coffin they hear a faint moan. Opening the lid, they find the man inside alive! He leaps out, performs a little jig, and lives another ten years before eventually keeling over.

Once again, a ceremony is conducted, and at the end, the pallbearers carry out the casket. As they head toward the doors of the church, the wife of the deceased leaps to her feet and shouts. "Watch the wall!!!"

**************************************** ***********************

WHAT A CHOICE

A little old lady was running up and down the halls in a nursing home. As she walked, she would flip up the hem of her nightgown and say, "Supersex." She walked up to an elderly man in a wheelchair. Flipping her gown at him, she said, "Supersex." He sat silently for a moment or two and finally answered, "I'll take the soup."

rose · 08-22-2008, 11:51 PM

Painless Childbirth

A married couple went to have their baby delivered. Upon their arrival, the
doctor said he had invented a new machine that would transfer a portion of
the mother's labor pain to the baby's father.

He asked if they were willing to try it out. They were both very much in
favor of it. The doctor set the pain transfer to 10% for starters,
explaining that even 10% was probably more pain than the father had ever
experienced before.

As the labor progressed, the husband felt fine and asked the doctor to go
ahead and kick it up a notch. The doctor then adjusted the machine to 20%
pain transfer.

The husband was still feeling fine. The doctor checked the husband's blood
pressure and was amazed at how well he was doing.

At this point, they decided to try for 50%. The husband continued to feel
quite well. Since the pain transfer was obviously helping out the wife
considerably, the husband encouraged the doctor to transfer ALL the pain to
him.

The wife delivered a healthy baby with virtually no pain. She and her
husband were ecstatic.

When they got home, the mailman was dead on the porch

olly · 08-23-2008, 08:12 AM

first two jokes were great ,but i did not get the labour pains one

sorry for being so dim

take good care
caroline

olly · 08-23-2008, 08:19 AM

i thought the zebra joke was great,made me laugh and not at all in bad taste.
i have had many friends from different nationalities and i don't have a racist bone in my body,but jokes done in good taste and not offensive i think are ok.
i think all the political correctness in the world has gone a bit overboard.
its good to laugh at ourselves and each other,in good taste of course.
take good care
caroline

olly · 08-23-2008, 08:26 AM

i just re-read your joke rose and i got it

the mailman was the father.
i think i may need a lie down for an hour.
take good care
caroline

rose · 08-23-2008, 09:08 AM

LOL, that's ok, it took me a few moments to get Beth's

quadbliss · 08-23-2008, 05:41 PM

happy,

I wanted to publicly apologize to you because I publicly accused you of posting a racial joke. I am sorry that I caused you to feel offended and upset.

Please allow me to explain my position. To me, a joke that uses the stereotyped behavior of a particular group of people as the punch line, is wrong. It not only perpetuates the stereotype, it can also hurt members of the group it is aimed at.

Having said this, I am truly sorry. I did not mean to insinuate that you were a racist. I realize my views are a bit "overboard" compared to most, and this is not the first time my emotional opinions have gotten me into trouble on this forum.

Mike

happy · 08-23-2008, 06:47 PM

Quadbliss, thank you. I apologize too for overreacting. At least we now know where our hearts are. Be at peace my friend.

Happy

MtPockets · 08-24-2008, 11:22 AM

That is the kind of attitude that makes this Forum so special.

happy · 08-24-2008, 09:16 PM

Al, there are no words to express what a great man I think you are....angel kisses and heavens mist to you my dear friend.....I'm sad when I think of what you are enduring...
My prayers are with you.
Happy